Death and Dying

Ok, I know the title is terrible but it is what is on my mind these days.

I have been married to my wonderful husband for 20 years now, (1991) and after many years of trying have been blessed with a little baby girl (now 4).  I have a great life, fantastic husband, and funny little spark of a daughter and yet still want more.  I want to run and play with my little girl, I want to camp, hike and ride a bike and want to have the energy to do all this without being in severe pain!  I do not want my little girl growing up with a fat unhealthy Mummy, I want to set a good example and put a stop to obesity in our family.

My VSG is scheduled for May 4th and I cannot stop my mind from thinking: “what if I will be the 1 out of 1000 that does not make it?"  Wouldn't it be better to stay fat than to risk death?  What the heck have I fought for (and won)?  Should I have surgery?  How do I help all those people close to me understand that I needed to try for a healthier lifestyle and that living this way was slowly killing me? 

Praying for a new life following surgery!

Shay

 

Dying young due to obesity is a reality too.  Or even having an accident and it being complicated due to your obesity is a reality.  Complications due to the surgery are real.  The mortality rate due surgery is real.  But so are other mortality rates!

It's worth thinking about.  It's part of the decision making process.

My best to you whatever you decide.

I am going to go ahead but am terrified of leaving my family behind.  I agree that I could die from the complications from obesity as well which is one of the reasons I have tried so hard for this - but that said, my fear is still there.  I am looking forward to a week out of surgery and then a month and then a year..... I am looking forward to a new life and hope death is not in my near future!

I'll bet anyone who has any kind of surgery fears dying. Last year my 30-year-old niece put off a desperately-needed back surgery because she had a 6 month old. Her back got so bad she was warned it could be permanently debilitating. She had it done and is good as new.

We all have really good reasons to want to live. I'll bet you'll be OK, too. This isn't meant to down-play your fears. Before they wheeled me away I was thinking the same thing you are.

Thank you, that brings a little light to my evening.  I love knowing that you are here now and doing well after surgery!!

This is a common fear and a very real one.

I was 2 months away from 60 years old when I had it done.  Lots of co-morbidity illnesses.  My risks were a little higher than yours.  I have two sweet grandsons that I want to stay alive to be with as long as possible.  When I weighed all the pros and cons... the surgery was just something I knew that I HAD to do.  I am so glad I did.

I picked the best doctor in my area and it has been a good thing.

I will be praying for you that you will have peace no matter what decision you make.

Thank you... I know I can get worse and that is what keeps me moving forward.  My left knee is in so much pain now and I am having a hard time climbing stairs let alone walking.  I have a hard time lifting my little girl or running after her on her new bike and wonder:  "what kind of life is this?"

I need and want a new life and although I am terrified, I have decided to keep on moving forward.

Thank you for sharing, I wish and hope that my Mum will look into doing something like this in the near future.  She now has diabetes and spends so much of her time, sick and in bed.  I want a better life for her too, but she may never get it.  She just said to me the other day:  "why don't you just really try harder this time", in reference to dieting.  I mean COME ON, we are both fat and have been for some time.... TRY HARDER????

Anyway, let not have me going down that path... :)

Thank you for sharing,
Shay

 I had all the same fears… I thought them through and tried to rationalize it all. Then in the end I just thought… **** it… I need to be healthy… and the chances of dying are slim and if I do… as ****** up as this is… well… I wont know about it. I just kinda felt like I was diving into a pool. Hold your breath and let go...

Would you do it again?

 In a heartbeat! I am 13 weeks out and down 49 pounds.. I am super thrilled with this all. I have had no complications and feel great. Playing with the kids is already easier and if I didn't lost another pound Id get a tummy tuck and weight 180 forever!