Death and Dying

I think life is a gamble,  my daughter has a friend she went to school with who was sitting on her couch in her living room with her daughter and a little plane crashed into her living room.  She and her daughter were untouched,  for some reason that has always stayed in my mind.  Tomorrow isn't promised,  anything can happen but i don't live my life thinking of all the bad things that could happen.  I  try to think of the good that can happen.   Being healthy so you are around for your daughter to be an active part of her life,  to help her grow up to be healthy and not suffer from obesity is a wonderful motivation. To be a wife and a Mom that is involved in their lives is a great gift.   The odds are in our favor.   I think you need to do what you know down deep inside is right for you and for them.  This is the best thing i ever did for myself and at the rate i was going i would be a real mess right about now,  thanks to my sleeve i have lots of good years ahead of me to spend with my 34 yo daughter and any babies she has.   I didn't want to have a lot of regrets for not doing what i knew i needed to do.  Sometimes the people we love don't understand and they are afraid for us,  but once you have the surgery they will all be so glad to see the new you.  I hope you find peace with this :o) jeani

Aw thanks,   i loved your video.  Beautiful family,  i hope you win not sure what the prize is.  I hope all goes good for you.  Remind us on 5/12 and tell us how to vote i'll be happy to vote for you  I clicked liked and left a message but i have a different name on youtube :o) jeani

Jeani,

I love your outlook on life and will do my best to be in the same frame of mind.  We have written our Will's and I have stashed away a letter to my daughter just in case.... that said I really am trying to remain positive.  I am so blessed  to have my little girl and I truly hope I get the chance to tell her that over and over again until she is saying the same about her little one.  I agree and want so much to ne healthy again, I cannot imagine my life like this, something MUST change!!

I hope to find peace with this as well and will keep your words in mind as I go into surgery:  " This is the best thing i ever did for myself".

Thank you,
Shay

hi shay,
       I can understand where you are coming from... I wondered the same thing, but I weighed the risks of obesity against the risk of surgery..I am sure that the obesity related deaths outweigh the deaths by surgery..you can die from cardiovascular disease, stroke, heart attacks, diabetes, lose limbs and never be able to go do the healthy things you want out of life. I made the decision to have my surgery based on what kind of life am I going to lead with them and the night before surgery I wrote my children letters with promises that my oldest son gave to them, and one day I will do each of those things with them.  If I remained 355 or heavier I know it would have only been a matter of time before I died due to obesity..I want my children to lead healthy lives..I hope that helps..

This does help, thank you.  I never thought of writing promises but LOVE the idea!  I have written a: please know that I loved you and had to do this letter, but like the idea of promises as well.  Perhaps I will write a list of promises to myself since my (almost) four year old will not understand?

I fought very hard for this surgery.  I won an appeal with OHIP, made numerous phone calls, wrote letters and pleaded for the surgery I think is my best option.  I can hardly believe that after a two year battle I am less than a week away from surgery!

So yes, I am afraid but I need to move forward.

Better get started on those promises :)
Shay

My boys are 13 years old (twins) and they actually framed them....they are waiting patiently to check each item off...I love this decision that i made, I lost 63 lbs so far and my surgery was Feb 7th...I feel so much better and I actually after 3 years found a job..I start in 2 weeks..You will not regret this decision.

Thank you.... I am only a few days away from surgery now and just want to hold my little girl as soon as I am out of the hospital.  I do think this is right for me, but want it to be right for my family as well.

Congratulations on your success, I hope to do even half as well !!!

Shay

every parent who undergoes this surgery has these feelings. If you didn't you would be made of stone. But believe me the ability to  fulfill those dreams you have are going to be wonderful memories for you and your daughter. Nothing feels worse than having your child hurt because of your weight - my daughter once told me that the kids at her school made fun of her because I was fat. That tore at my heart strings. She is very proud of me and understands that I did this to get healthy and be here for the long run for her.

I remember children making fun and laughing at my mother.  I even remember people pointing at her one day and knew they were being unkind.  I do not want that for my daughter and am also terrified that she will learn all those bad eating habits that my Mum passed on to me.  Hell, when you put it in those terms.... I want the surgery tomorrow!!!

I am glad that you are doing well.

Thank you for taking the time to write,
Shay

hiya shay,,,,,,,just wanted to add my 2 cents and ive read your page about getting appovel 4 surgery and i bet you have been threw so much more then you wrote, well think of all the ppl who cant for what ever reason get this wls they REALLY NEED, and now you can, we all at the beginning have soooooooo much B.S. to jump threw, i wanted this so much i could taste it, i wanted out of this FAT BODY, for alot of reasons, number one for me was chronic pain, i didnt want to live like that anymore, ive lost 100pds, feels lots better mentally physically, still have pain days but its lots better, this wls changes soooooo much in your life, and your loved ones lives, i was scared, but everything else out weighted that in the end, YOU WILL BE FINE, AND SO MUCH HAPPIER WITH EVERYTHING,,,,,,,,,,,,good luck, and im sure in a few weeks your going to be writing us all about how you cant get the smile off your face,,lol...............TRACY.