Compliments and Attention

DrHollywood
on 8/22/11 12:35 am - Harbor City, CA

I can relate to your post...

As far as the ending

                      ✿ L♦O♦V♦E ✿ & ✿ P♦E♦A♦C♦E ✿ღ ✿ & F♦R♦I♦E♦N♦D♦S ✿ ღ
                         "Keeping The Faith!"   "Slim by Summer!"
                                    HW: 250 - SW: 241 - CW: 154.7- GW: 140


1 month: 22 pounds (216) 2 months: 12.2 pounds (203.8) 3 months: 10.6  (193.2)
4 months: 9.7 lbs (183.5) 5 Months: 6 pounds (177.5 ) 6 Months: 12 lbs ( 165.5)
7 Months 7.1 lbs (158.4) 8 Months +1.6 pounds(159.8) 9 Months 2.7 pounds (157.1)
10 Months 8.1 lbs (149) 11 months +2 pounds ( 151) 1 YEAR!!! 2.6 pounds (148.4)


                                  Hit "One-derland April 9th, 2011   (199.7)

                                  "Half-Way Goal" April 25th, 2011 (194.8)

                                  "Happyland 80`s" May 14, 2011 (189.6)

                                   "Groovyland 70`s" June 20th 2011 (179.9)

                                    " HippyDippyland 60's" July 16th (169.8)

                                       " CQQL-land 50`s" August 25th ( 159.8)

                        "Normal BMI" 24.8 October 21st, 2011 (154.5) I am 5`6

                                 "AWESOME-land 40's" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                              "Century Club 100 Pounds" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                                ' ONE YEAR SURGIVERSARY!!!"

Two Year Surgiversary!!!"

Krazydoglady
on 8/21/11 9:09 pm - FL

VSG on 01/28/11

Funny, I was having this conversation with my best friend last night. I was at a Bar Mitzvah over the weekend with family that hadn't seen me in about 4 months. I was down 80lbs at that point, now down 120. It's like they didn't notice the first 80lbs gone. The complimenting was a little overwhelming as were the 'how do you feel?" questions. I think the "how do you feel" bothers more than anything else because it reflects this underlying belief that if your'e MO, you must (or should) be filled with self loathing . I smiled and said thank you a lot, but I was a little sharper when quizzed on the 'how do you feel' question. I have a great husband, teriffic career, wonderful home and life, in general. WLS hasn't changed that.

What is a little odd is some of the (well meaning) women in my life who I feel are now trying to play 'Hoochie-Mama Barbie" with me. I appreciate I'm a size 12 these days, but I have always been a fairly modest dresser regardless of my size. The black and white zebra stripe lycra mini-dress (think Deborah Harry circa 1980) and spike heals are hot, no doubt, but seriously, I have nothing to prove.

Carolyn (32 lbs lost Pre-op) HW: 291, SW: 259, GW: 129.5, CW: 126.4

Age: 45, Height: 5'2 1/4" , Stretch Goal: 122

DrHollywood
on 8/22/11 12:38 am - Harbor City, CA

VSG on 02/01/11

Awww what a CQQL story. Thank you for sharing your experience.
I so can relate to not noticing the first pounds then all of a sudden... WHAM!!!
Then all the questions chime in...." how do you feel" or the stares by some.

You sound like your in a wonderful position in life... WTG!

                      ✿ L♦O♦V♦E ✿ & ✿ P♦E♦A♦C♦E ✿ღ ✿ & F♦R♦I♦E♦N♦D♦S ✿ ღ
                         "Keeping The Faith!"   "Slim by Summer!"
                                    HW: 250 - SW: 241 - CW: 154.7- GW: 140


1 month: 22 pounds (216) 2 months: 12.2 pounds (203.8) 3 months: 10.6  (193.2)
4 months: 9.7 lbs (183.5) 5 Months: 6 pounds (177.5 ) 6 Months: 12 lbs ( 165.5)
7 Months 7.1 lbs (158.4) 8 Months +1.6 pounds(159.8) 9 Months 2.7 pounds (157.1)
10 Months 8.1 lbs (149) 11 months +2 pounds ( 151) 1 YEAR!!! 2.6 pounds (148.4)


                                  Hit "One-derland April 9th, 2011   (199.7)

                                  "Half-Way Goal" April 25th, 2011 (194.8)

                                  "Happyland 80`s" May 14, 2011 (189.6)

                                   "Groovyland 70`s" June 20th 2011 (179.9)

                                    " HippyDippyland 60's" July 16th (169.8)

                                       " CQQL-land 50`s" August 25th ( 159.8)

                        "Normal BMI" 24.8 October 21st, 2011 (154.5) I am 5`6

                                 "AWESOME-land 40's" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                              "Century Club 100 Pounds" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                                ' ONE YEAR SURGIVERSARY!!!"

Two Year Surgiversary!!!"

cattywompos
on 8/21/11 10:17 pm

VSG on 09/30/10

Like doggz I think to myself "they can't honestly think I am good looking". I still see myself as that 300lb person and have a hard time seeing what others see. I have my moments when I look at myself and think I look pretty good, but they are few and far between. My mind just hasn't caught up yet I guess. I do enjoy the attention however! It makes me feel good :) So how do I handle it? I just soak it in!

HW-304 / SW- 286 / CW-198.25 / GW-170

DrHollywood
on 8/22/11 12:40 am - Harbor City, CA

VSG on 02/01/11

Awww CQQL.... soak it in and I read a few posts above to say thank you and smile.
This is part of changing and accepting we are where we are...arent we? Thank you
for sharing.

                      ✿ L♦O♦V♦E ✿ & ✿ P♦E♦A♦C♦E ✿ღ ✿ & F♦R♦I♦E♦N♦D♦S ✿ ღ
                         "Keeping The Faith!"   "Slim by Summer!"
                                    HW: 250 - SW: 241 - CW: 154.7- GW: 140


1 month: 22 pounds (216) 2 months: 12.2 pounds (203.8) 3 months: 10.6  (193.2)
4 months: 9.7 lbs (183.5) 5 Months: 6 pounds (177.5 ) 6 Months: 12 lbs ( 165.5)
7 Months 7.1 lbs (158.4) 8 Months +1.6 pounds(159.8) 9 Months 2.7 pounds (157.1)
10 Months 8.1 lbs (149) 11 months +2 pounds ( 151) 1 YEAR!!! 2.6 pounds (148.4)


                                  Hit "One-derland April 9th, 2011   (199.7)

                                  "Half-Way Goal" April 25th, 2011 (194.8)

                                  "Happyland 80`s" May 14, 2011 (189.6)

                                   "Groovyland 70`s" June 20th 2011 (179.9)

                                    " HippyDippyland 60's" July 16th (169.8)

                                       " CQQL-land 50`s" August 25th ( 159.8)

                        "Normal BMI" 24.8 October 21st, 2011 (154.5) I am 5`6

                                 "AWESOME-land 40's" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                              "Century Club 100 Pounds" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                                ' ONE YEAR SURGIVERSARY!!!"

Two Year Surgiversary!!!"

SassyItalian
on 8/21/11 10:27 pm - Basseterre, St. Kitts and Nevis

VSG on 12/21/10

I definitely understand where you are coming from. The attention is amplified and I almost feel like a piece of meat (prime rib waff!) sometimes.

As you said, its nice, flattering, people go out of their way to talk to me, help me, I get better customer service, things for free, everything. But sometimes I think it is too much. Attracting way more people means I attract alot of the wrong ones too!! Let's face it, some people are real and genuine and some are full of it and insincere. I try not to questions everyone's motives but I also know when someone is not a good person and I wont hesitate to remove myself from the situation.

I, like you, havent 100% wrapped my head around it..I am still kind of accustomed to being invisable and I am definitely not invisable any more and its quite a change.

I think over time as all the attention becomes more normal we will adjust a bit.

you are looking marvelous darling!!!! saw the clubbing pics. No wonder you are beating them off with a stick.

                      HW: 258lbs  SW: 240   CW: 140 I am 5 foot 7 and 30 years old
                 VSG 12/21/10  Plastics: Tummy tuck, breast lift, and augmentation 11/3/11
                                             Soon to be veterinarian!! xoxo

DrHollywood
on 8/22/11 12:46 am - Harbor City, CA

VSG on 02/01/11

lol @ the prime rib comment

2nd paragraph - "Try not to question everyones motives" WOW I do this.
I sooOooo needed to hear this and will work on trying not to question everyones
motives. I feel like this is a rented, temporary suit and my lease is going to be
up soon. If the complements just keep coming... and my rented suit has to be returned
... then what? I know silly right?

Your right...over time we will adjust a bit...

Awwwww Thank you for the compliment. I have always thought you were HAAAWT and Beautiful
yourself!

                      ✿ L♦O♦V♦E ✿ & ✿ P♦E♦A♦C♦E ✿ღ ✿ & F♦R♦I♦E♦N♦D♦S ✿ ღ
                         "Keeping The Faith!"   "Slim by Summer!"
                                    HW: 250 - SW: 241 - CW: 154.7- GW: 140


1 month: 22 pounds (216) 2 months: 12.2 pounds (203.8) 3 months: 10.6  (193.2)
4 months: 9.7 lbs (183.5) 5 Months: 6 pounds (177.5 ) 6 Months: 12 lbs ( 165.5)
7 Months 7.1 lbs (158.4) 8 Months +1.6 pounds(159.8) 9 Months 2.7 pounds (157.1)
10 Months 8.1 lbs (149) 11 months +2 pounds ( 151) 1 YEAR!!! 2.6 pounds (148.4)


                                  Hit "One-derland April 9th, 2011   (199.7)

                                  "Half-Way Goal" April 25th, 2011 (194.8)

                                  "Happyland 80`s" May 14, 2011 (189.6)

                                   "Groovyland 70`s" June 20th 2011 (179.9)

                                    " HippyDippyland 60's" July 16th (169.8)

                                       " CQQL-land 50`s" August 25th ( 159.8)

                        "Normal BMI" 24.8 October 21st, 2011 (154.5) I am 5`6

                                 "AWESOME-land 40's" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                              "Century Club 100 Pounds" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                                ' ONE YEAR SURGIVERSARY!!!"

Two Year Surgiversary!!!"

(deactivated member)
on 8/21/11 10:53 pm

VSG on 03/22/11

When the compliments first started I found myself lowering my head and shyly saying thank you. I wasn't used to compliments about how I looked. Than after a while-as more weight came off-I found myself holding my head up high and looking them in the eye and saying thank you with a huge smile. I worked hard to get wear I am and I am damn proud of it- and I love the compliments! It is still weird. Just this morning a co-worker was like "You look so great! You look..normal! OMG I'm sorry I hope that doesn't offend you!' I was like NO I'll take normal!

As far as the opposite sex- I've never been one to be good at realizing someone is flirting with me.I am noticing guy's looking at me and talking to me more. I like it- now if a cute one would just ask me out! 2 years ago I broke up with a man that I was with for about 15 years-it was a terrible time in my life-I had a very hard time coping-I know I still have some walls up from being terribly hurt over him-so the whole flirting thing is hard for me.

My head def has not caught up with my size.It just hit me the other day-I can remember before surgery thinking GOD I would give anything to be a size 12! Here I am at a size 12! I'm a 12! HOLY COW! I am so focused on being a 8- that I am not enjoying the 12! :)

I LOVE my sleeve!!

DrHollywood
on 8/22/11 12:51 am - Harbor City, CA

VSG on 02/01/11

Yes yes that is me... lowering my head......I am practicing saying thank you and looking at them
in the eye and smiling and shutting my mouth.. because my mouth wants to make
a million excuses of all the flaws I still have, saggy skin... but but but...etc etc etc

normal and not being looked as obese .... WOW..... Its such an amazing feeling.
I cannot believe I let myself get that bad for years... I was slowly committing suicide with
food.

I so hear you..." I love my sleeve" I so relate and realize, its me I am falling in love with

                      ✿ L♦O♦V♦E ✿ & ✿ P♦E♦A♦C♦E ✿ღ ✿ & F♦R♦I♦E♦N♦D♦S ✿ ღ
                         "Keeping The Faith!"   "Slim by Summer!"
                                    HW: 250 - SW: 241 - CW: 154.7- GW: 140


1 month: 22 pounds (216) 2 months: 12.2 pounds (203.8) 3 months: 10.6  (193.2)
4 months: 9.7 lbs (183.5) 5 Months: 6 pounds (177.5 ) 6 Months: 12 lbs ( 165.5)
7 Months 7.1 lbs (158.4) 8 Months +1.6 pounds(159.8) 9 Months 2.7 pounds (157.1)
10 Months 8.1 lbs (149) 11 months +2 pounds ( 151) 1 YEAR!!! 2.6 pounds (148.4)


                                  Hit "One-derland April 9th, 2011   (199.7)

                                  "Half-Way Goal" April 25th, 2011 (194.8)

                                  "Happyland 80`s" May 14, 2011 (189.6)

                                   "Groovyland 70`s" June 20th 2011 (179.9)

                                    " HippyDippyland 60's" July 16th (169.8)

                                       " CQQL-land 50`s" August 25th ( 159.8)

                        "Normal BMI" 24.8 October 21st, 2011 (154.5) I am 5`6

                                 "AWESOME-land 40's" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                              "Century Club 100 Pounds" Dec 1st 2011 (149)

                                ' ONE YEAR SURGIVERSARY!!!"

Two Year Surgiversary!!!"

jennkitt
on 8/21/11 11:02 pm - MI

VSG on 04/25/11

Do you see a therapist? I only ask because you are totally describing a conversation I had with my therapist before surgery. We were "problem solving" what some future problems may feel like with weight loss. For some of us, the extra weight was a nice physical barrier to protect us from unwanted sexual advances. I am only speaking for myself, but often past trauma/experiences can be linked to the extra weight, and when we lose that barrier, you start feeling really vulnerable.

I problem solved with my therapist to come up with a plan when I became uncomfortable with comments, etc. so that I didn't turn to food, because unconsciously we reach for food, to plump that barrier that protects us back up.

Just my 2 cents :-)

HW: 305, Consult: 285, Day of surg:261

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