Is it ok for me to say...

 :-)

I am at my 3 week post op stall, my surgery was march 21st. Most people go through it. As far as cheating??? I'm on a liquid diet and I struggle to get 70 grams of protein in a day much less anything else. After 3 protein shakes I cant go anymore... Until you have had YOUR surgery you just don't know.

First I do agree with most..... Ya gotta do some of this first before your opinion is going to have any real substance.

The point you bring to light comes up just about Weekly nowadays.

A couple of the majors complainers could be on this thread!!!

One reason that you see a few people post about being less than smart, knowing full well what they do wrong and know exactly what to do correct it....

Some (some means not all) people do it for validation ......

It will start out like:

I'm not losing weight.... I'm in a 3 month stall... I know I should eat better and go to the gym. But it was cloudy today and well cloudy means Oreos where I come from. And for the past 2 weeks my car has auto pilot straight to McDs after work everyday. Plus my dang sis in law keeps bringing over my favorite Apple Pie (to die for).

The person posting these is only posting (fishing for) for immediate validation.....
Some respose posts may look like this:

I hear ya gurl...... I just did a 2 liter Mt. Dew and a pack of Snow Balls at break time at work.
My dang hubby brings home cream puffs or cupcakes, I ended up eating though out the evening.........

And others chime in with similar stories.

Or awe...... To bad......try harde next time.

At the end..... Tho OP thinks it's not so bad cause she is not the only one making less than smart decisions.

frisco

 I think Frisco's post is a bit one sided.  I do think that some are trolling for validation.  But I think many use it as a form of accountablility, a strategy to help get themselves back on plan, or a way to illustrate that there was a struggle and what worked to get them back on plan.  I think this is a healthy use of this forum.  People need to have the opportunity to explore why they have food issues, identify triggers or situations to avoid, etc.  

I adore the vets on this board, and I have learned and benefitted greatly from their input.  But I also think that having this "all or nothing mentality can be a very slippery slope for a person to be on.  A huge part of this process is learning how to adjust after eating something off plan- this is what normal people do.  If we do not learn how to make adjustments to keep things balanced then I would argue that maintenence would be even more difficult given that the caloric options open up a bit more and without the strategies to deal with the greater options in place it could be a minefield.  

Now I completely understand that I am no where near goal and perhaps my views will again change as I progress further on this.  For now, I am an advocate of balance and honesty with oneself. And balance is not "code" for eat whatever the heck you want!

Well said. I agree. And I'll add - the wonderful thing about this site is the variety of posts that are made. So if you can't relate or encourage or support what one person is going through - close out and move to another.  But be careful not to judge - AT ALL IF POSSIBLE.  We all know that feeling when you've walked by "a normal" who looked at you at your highest weights or in the middle of one of your sincere weightloss attempts and thought "...what a looser".  Let's be careful not to adopt that mentality when we have reached our goals and see others still struggling (for whatever reason) - it's all about paying it forward or giving it back. whichever you prefer. and everyone's hang-ups don't come in a nice neat package. remember: "...there, but for the grace of God, go I."  HAPPY EASTER! :-)

I think you are pretty spot on with your assessment. The all-or-nothing thinking is part of what a lot of us struggled with.. the I ate that piece of chocolate, Why can't I be good??  I blew it- so I might as well get that pint of B&J's on the way home, I'll start over tomorrow. Sound familiar to anyone? It does to me. People with normal healthy eating behaviors don't think like this.

This is not normal thinking. Normal thinking is, that was a darn tasty piece of chocolate, yum. Well, better go grab those chicken breasts and salad so I can start dinner.. No guilt, no make-up starvation.. just carry-on in the normal manner. 

Honesty with oneself is HUGE. You cannot get to a healthy place if you continually blame forces outside yourself for your own behaviors.. My sister, my kids, my husband.. co-workers.. Unless they are holding your down and force feeding you, it's all you and always has been. Add to that- Infusing foods with some misplaced moral weight (I ate bad food, and therefore I am bad & the opposite, I am a good person, I ate nothing but healthy lean food) is something I see a lot of, and I hate seeing it.. both are extremes.