Question for those Who Question Calories/Plan

Maybe people who stay on OH are more successful than people who don't because of the support and accountability, not because of their food plan.  Just a thought.  

A good plan followed imperfectly for the long term will work, I really believe that.  It's the long-term that's so difficult.  I believe in keeping my calories as low as possible for as long as possible.  It's probably more like 800-900 calories now, but I'm losing well as long as I keep the carbs low.

If I didn't participate in this or some other support group, I would quickly forget how messed up my food thinker is.  Then I'd try to start rationalizing all kinds of bad food behaviors and then I'd be lost.

   

 I think that the people who staty on here may be more open to having their ideas challenged and learning from others.  In my short time on the board I have seen some people show up looking for validation of bad choices, and then they just disappear.  I think many people confuse support with affirmation.

Food for thought:

I've had a clinical psychologist warn me that some of the discussions I've shared with her going on in the VSG boards could be an unhealthy trigger for dialectical patters/belief systems that could hinder my success. Interestingly, however, the RNY board of OH actually had fewer triggers like these. I am still uncertain about how much activity here is healthy for me.

It has nothing to do with being validated for bad choices. It had everything to do with a (largely) unmoderated board where peoples individual issues/psychological triggers are sometimes used to brow beat others into fitting into the box that their mind believes they need to stay within, or else "fail." It's about this board's very strong support for black-and-white, all-or-nothing thinking: "My plan, or failure," "My idea of a correct goal weight, or obesity," "100% EWL or failure (nevermind how that EWL is being calculated)," etc.

It sounds like a small thing, but this is exactly the kind of thinking that drives the entire yo-yo diet eating syndromes, along with other eating disorders, and it is something that runs RAMPANT on this board. This is not a criticism of you directly, Rob or Frisco, but of the VSG board and its tone.

I think we need to look honestly at this side of the issue if we're going to make an honest appraisal of OH's efficacy as a support network for post-ops.

Somayeh

 Personally, I agree with you on the tone of the board.  It easily devolves into a series of personal attacks.  If you tell someone that they need to check their motives for eating a dozen chocolate chip cookies or point out that chocolate chip cookies are not bariatric friendly food, you get 300 replies along the lines of "who are you to tell them what to do".  It makes it really difficult to try and offer advice to anyone or share what works for you.  There have been a lot of that type of post lately.  Those are the examples I put up of people only posting for validation.

In my case, I would say 90% of my posts contain the same theme as what you state below

1.  Work on your mental issues, thats the key to long term success
2  Stay on your plan
3.  Talk to you doctor and get straight answers from them.

As far as driving dialectical triggers in people and using those to browbeat people into submission - I honestly don't see that as being the case.  I honestly haven't seen one person on here trying to do that.  I don't see a lot of people driving a black and white, all or nothing approach.  I do see a lot of people who have had success on similar plans sharing that success.  Statistical norms exist for a reason, which Frisco's question adresses in a rather socratic way (speaking of dialectical reasoning...), If the majority of people get to goal on plan a, and only a few get to goal on plan b - why argue in favor of plan b being as successful as plan a?

I have learned more from having ruggie and frisco tell me I am overthinking something, Elina giving me an excellent suggestion for goal, being challenged by allison, happy, and the rest than I have from 1000 posts just agreeing.  I again posit, that OH is an invaluable resource for both education and support of post-ops, including the vsg forum, but that people first have to be open to the discussion and willing to have their ideas challenged.  

There is no one on here (except the spammers) who wants to hurt anyone elses journey, i honestly believe that everything on here is offered selflessly in the spirit of paying our own successes forward.

Ditto.....I rarely post anymore because you usually hit a thread and say the same thing I would have said.....just much more clear and to the point!

 Don't hesitate to post.  You have a great point of view, and all of the positive reinforcement can't hurt - only help.

You hit the nail on the head Someyah!

 Hmm... food for thought for sure.  For the first several months I did a pretty consistent job at the 800 or less and under 40.  Then a month or so between 1000-1200, but lost about the same amount.  Now, reverted back to the original diet the NUT gave me of 3 shakes and 1 meal a day, and additionally I am keeping it under 800.  I think for me the biggest issue has been the carbs- higher carbs, higher cravings and caloric intake.  We will see where this leads. 

I can't live on 600-800 calories. I workout daily and most of my workouts equate to 500-800 calories burned (minus 20% for being an ex-fatty *grumbles*). That's a big weekly deficit.

I knew I was taking the slower route by adding in that much exercise while trying to lose weight. Hindsight, I probably should have lost the weight and then looked for a good exercise regiment.

I'm not sorry I went the way I did. I was worried about transfer addiction and I wanted to chose what it would be - not let it chose me. Karate is my transfer addiction and LOVE to hate it.

I will say that I usually stay pretty close to the 800 calories - typically under 900. This week I'm upping my protein to 125 grams min a day - fell like I need more protein. That is also upping my calories to about 1000-1100. We will just have to see if I'm sorry for upping my calories at the end of the week.

As for staying on OH, I kind of love it and hate. I stay because it helps me remember what I did (cut out 85% of my stomach) and why (to get healthy.)

Looks like I'm one of the rare ones *****ached 100% EWL on a minimum of 1200 cal/day.  At 3 months post-op, my surgeon gave me the ok to raise my caloric intake to 1200 because I started excercising regularly.  

I'm at the high end of a "normal" BMI of anywhere between 24.0 to 24.9 on any given day.  And I'm very comfortable here!  I've been overweight ALL of my 52yrs  and know that my skin (at least what's visible!) won't be as forgiving if I lose anymore.

I've maintaned 153-157 lbs since last September.  My gym offers a monthly weight/body comparison.  My average fat mass is 18-19%...normal for my age group is to be under 30.  So thankfully, I'm still a success story at having 1200cal/day since my 3rd month post op.

I haven't posted a new avatar in a while since I'm not on the computer as much as I used to be.  But feel free to see more recent pictures on my profile.