Helping Family Members and Friends who don't have VSG...

My husband has been so supportive of me.  He's never had much of a weight problem. Frankly, before, when he'd fret over needing to lose 20 pounds, I'd wonder if he was trying to get ME to lose weight by setting an example. But the fact is that his 20-25 pounds is really beginning to bother him, and as I get close to goal I think it bothers him even more.

But he doesn't have the advantage I have. He still has hunger pangs!

I started to suggest he "undereat his stomach" and not eat until he's full, but it seems like a totally different approach considering I'm essentially telling him to stop eating while he's still "hungry" (even though it's really that the food tastes good, not that he's still starving.)

Mainly, I want to be as supportive of him as he is of me, but the best support he has given me has never been through advice. Frankly, most of the "advice" he gave me through the years sucked, because he was coming from a totally different place.

Now I feel like positions are reversed, because any advice that comes to mind is what I'd say to somebody else with a sleeve, not to someone with a normal stomach.

What do you say to others who don't have our advantage?

My BFF and I have been overweight together for years. When I had VSG in August, she committed to making a change and said she'd be damned if she'd stay fat while I got thin. LOL. She has been doing lower carb (

My husband does CrossFit and has lost weight through exercise.  He is surrounded by people who do low carb, and finally started doing low carb (which he scoffed at when I was doing Atkins!). 

So I'd say to make sure you don't have any food in the house that isn't low carb (or falls within whatever food guidelines you can agree on).  I bet he has hunger pangs because he eats too fast, so he doesn't know when he's full.

From the experience of the men I know who are only 20-25 overweight, they can lose that with just a little extra exercise and cutting back a little on portions and booze.

If you are making the food, just make enough for the portion size for that meal.  That way there is no "extra" food for him to eat -- or pack up the extra for lunches before you serve dinner.

But you can only directly influence meals he eats at home. He can lose weight when it becomes important enough for him -- he might even find that something like WW online works for him!  I'm betting that you are right about him wanting to lose weight now that you have lost weight.

There are  lots of ways, he'll just have to find what works for him. Just be encouraging and make it easy to stay on a food plan at home!

I'm completely honest with them - I tried every diet known to mankind and couldn't do it without the VSG.  I offer my love, support, and empathy because I know weight loss is one of the hardest things in the world to do.  And I offer to help any way I can - we go for short walks together, share food ideas, etc.  I never try to talk anyone into WLS, but I am open talking about it to anyone who wants to.  Three co-workers have gone to the orientation class in the 7 months since I had my surgery because they've see how it's changed my whole life.

I wonder if following the 30/30 rule regarding eating and drinking would help, just as it helps us sleevers.  I really have no idea whether that would work with someone who has a complete stomach, but maybe worth a try?