help!

I am 2 years out and have totally derailed.  I've been through a nasty divorce and custody battle and stress ate the whole way through.  Can anybody tell me the fastest way to get back on track??  I am ashamed to say I have gained 30 pounds back from this!!

I'm only 16 days post op but I have been thru a nasty divorce.  From my experience I would say try hard to focus on yourself and work on yourself, inside and out.  Know it will pass and life will get beyond this.  I'm a happy woman today, but I did not get here overnight.  You will get thru this and YOU need to be your focus.  Just my opinion from my own experience.

Thanks!!  Any help is appreciated! 

First - get rid of the shame. .Gaining some weight does not make you a bad person.  Then, find yourself a WLS support group or a counselor specializing in weight issues. Sounds like your eating is emotional, so if you deal with the emotions in a more positive way then your weight should resolve itself. Or find a hobby or activity that is active (mine is swimming/snorkeling/scuba diving). I know I have to be fit to do the things I love, so that motivates me.  Exercise and/or medication can also help with stress. Surround yourself with good people too. 

I am so thankful for your post.  I feel a lot of shame because people told me not to do the surgery because I was going to just gain the weight back.  I did, not all but a lot of it.  I'm am trying to start over and tell myself that I am ready to lose the weight.  I don't think I was prepared for when I lost the weight the first time.  I was prepared for the challenges that it brought.  I thought it was going to be my dream come true.  It was but it also brought on headaches I never thought possible.  -CC

First of all, let me say that I'm so sorry to hear that you've been having a rough time with your divorce and custody issues... But I'm going to give you some (very loving) tough love, ok?

You know what to do. You did it immediately post op and you can do it again. Purge your house of anything "off plan" and get down to business. High protein, low carb, and lots of water. Your body will resist the sudden change and you will have some nasty carb cravings if you have let carbs sneak back in as you've regained... WHITE KNUCKLE for a few days if you have to in order to allow your body to detox from the carbs. Think of yourself as a junkie who is coming down from your drug of choice. You will likely be grouchy and antsy for a few days. Don't be surprised if you find yourself pacing in the kitchen looking for a "fix." Do not sabotage yourself for those first few days, no matter what... Everything will be MUCH easier after that, once your head is clear and your body is freed from the carb cravings.

I do not advocate going back to the post op liquid stages (broths, etc) as a form of going "back to basics." This far out from surgery, you will only leave yourself legitimately hungry, which will make this more difficult than it has to be. Stick to lean, dense proteins like chicken, beef, and fish/shellfish. Avoid protein bars, etc. in order to keep your calories lower... That being said, I don't see anything wrong with using protein shakes as meal replacements if you can find one that gives you the best "bang for your buck" as far as protein v. calories goes... I make a distinction between the liquid "stages" and using shakes. Shakes can give you boosts of protein when you haven't done so hot some days.

Good luck! Use this board! It is an excellent source of motivation and accountability. Feel free to add me and PM any time if you need an accountability partner :)

Thank you!!  Sometimes I think I need a swift kick in the are to bring me back to the real world.  Lol. 

I feel your pain on the divorce & custody battle.  I've been through the same with my ex- he has tried to take our daughter from me twice & only stopped when I-yes I found-not my attorney or their investigators his previous criminal history with violence against co-workers & his wife before me she actually had a restraining order against him.  After finding out that information I was awarded full custody of our child but that never stopped his lashing out.  Our ugly battles affect the children the most my daughter loves her Dad but doesn't feel the same way she once did about him not because of my words but because of another stupid custody battle he put us through when she was 9-old enough to kinda know what he was up to.  anyway I am so sorry you went through that.  I still have a black hole in my heart all these years later.  I also want to add my ex did not I mean DID NOT come around at all to see our daughter until I re-married.  I was the opposite & actually would lose weight during those stressful times.  Please don't beat yourself up; today is a new day & the best advice you got was above from Crissy about doing a pantry purge & going on low carb lots of water & high protein like in the beginning.  My thoughts & prayers go out to you & your family & I pray you can heal & move on with a happy life that you deserve; we all deserve that.

I'm sorry for what you are going through.  Thank you for asking the question and admitting the shame. I feel the same but someone's post is right.  We need to rid ourselves of the shame.  I'm just gonna have to figure out how to stop shaming myself. 

You can do this.  So life happened and you got off track, you need to back to basics.  It will not be easy but you need to go back to eating high protein/low carb.  You will have to define what is low carb to you.  If you have been eating a lot of carbs/empty calories, your body is going to go through some withdrawals.  Cutting back on the sweets/empty carbs will cause you to be moody and tired.  You can do this all at once or over a time period but don't make excuses and give in when it gets rough.  Start logging everything that goes into your mouth, don't drink 30 minutes before/after you eat (especially after).  Eat dense protein at every meal and as a snack also if you need it.  If you eat a lot of protein then you won't have room for the unhealthy stuff.  Make sure you are eating 80-100 grams of protein and then fill the rest in with healthy vegetables.  It will get easier.  If you are drinking your calories then you need to stop.  Make sure you are getting enough water each day.

You can do this!!!!!!!