Saturday, August 9, 2025

116.8

i didn't get my hair done yesterday because my stylist forgot to change the appointment in her book. Not a long drive but I could have done something like yoga with the time. She sent me a txt later telling me that it might have been a good thing because the water went off in the building. Having foils for highlighting in my hair with no way to rinse it out would not have been good. Instead I food shopped, put away the stuff from the Mary Poppins bag, and put the bathroom back together (we had it painted). Fun night out with friends. I have missed them!

Now that my bathroom is painted non-gray I can see that the tone on the cabinets was grayish as is the bathtub. So now I have to think about what to do about that. My handyman can paint the cabinets but I think I would need a bathtub refinisher to do the tub. That's a pain, but then it would all look put together.

Not sure what we will do today. Like every other day there is the threat of thunderstorms but it looks like it is clearing. Hopefully we can get in a Justice walk (note to self - put on bug spray), followed by water aerobics. We have a dinner dance at the Beach Club tonight.

Have a sonorous Saturday!

What color did you choose for the bathroom walls? I'm curious about the tub refinishing. How durable is that?

Nephew closed on the house Tuesday, August 5. I assumed he would move out this weekend. So far, we are the only ones who have moved anything from our house to there when we brought over a load in our car. There is furniture being moved today. Last night BFF told DH that nephew would be moving out next weekend. I'm going to have to have another chat with her. I planned a small dinner party weeks ago for the 16th, knowing that was 11 days after the closing. They can't be moving out the day I have guests coming over at 4pm. (We're starting early with drinks on the porch). In addition, I NEED my office/closet back to start prepping for my month long trip the end of the month. If he's out by next weekend, that's still time, but I'm going to need confirmation that's happening.

Then DH got up before me and BFF asked him if we have plans today. She asked if we could meet them at the condo this afternoon to help move in furniture. Notice all of her communication has been with DH. She's never seen a boundary she won't try and crash through. I get up and DH asks me if we have plans, hoping I'll set the boundary . I don't know what has gone down, so I say, not specifically. Geeze Louise. So while they're driving around collecting Facebook Marketplace items, we're supposed to just stand by, waiting for a call they need help unloading? If they wanted help, why wait until the last minute. Nephew did say a friend of his was helping, so I think they're fine without us. Anyhow, we have plans now. I just bought tickets to see a movie at 2:20pm. Ill be texting BFF to let her know.

I know we did the right thing offering sanctuary, but I didn't know it would be so hard. Almost done.

So plans on this rainy day include going to see the movie my Mother's Wedding, and eating popcorn peacefully in the dark. And now I will read the paper :) while everyone (including the 3 children who spent the night) is gone.

Yes, sounds like your Minnesota nice has gone too far and boundaries must be set. Easier said than done. I'm glad you scheduled the movie! Enjoy! Popcorn sounds good!

The thing with BFF is she is very loyal, very loving, caring, lots of fun, but she cannot stay in her lane. I've learned over time to keep boundaries, but I cannot always anticipate the crash through until it has happened. For example, that I have to discuss next weekend? It never occurred to me that anybody would want to stay 11 days AFTER closing on their own house. So I'll take care of it, but geeze. DH is now instructed that any questions, plans, favors will be answered with: I will check with my DW. It's no accident that some of the boundary stuff was directed at DH rather than me. Sometimes he's a soft touch.

You are handling things much better than I would. I also don't doubt that she purposely asked the question to DH knowing he is a softy! I agree about the closing date and moving out date. Who would think they would still not be completely moved into the new place!

It does seem like BFF has some realization that she is overstaying since she approached DH and not you. Hopefully she responds well in the situations when you have to set boundaries, but it must be tough for you to have to broach the subject calmly. Certainly staying that long past the closing is really pushing the envelope.

We painted the bathroom a cream color with 2 walls a hydrangea blue. They are the colors I had in my other Florida home in the living room. They brighten it up from the dark gray it used to be (kind of a metal gray). I'm not sure that bathtub refinishing is great if you take lots of baths. I would think it would wear off over time. But we never take baths so it is really just to make it look better in the room. We usually just use it to hang things to dry.

No weight this morning as I was up far too early. But yesterday I was down 1.5 from the day before (203.4). I'm sure it will take a couple of days to get back into my normal comfort range.

I'm sitting on a plane ready to head off to Seattle to evaluate a litter of pups. I changed my return flight so I don't have to spend the night. I'll get home around 1 AM, as long as there are no delays. Still better than coming home tomorrow, IMO. Sadly, there was a fare change, but the seat is in first class, so I will get to enjoy that perk.

I was pretty darn cranky yesterday. After some consideration, I was able to understand the root of the crankiness. Not much I can do about it immediately, but the recognition alleviated feeling overly cranky. Basically, with all the alone time driving back from Ohio, I had a lot of thinking time. My crankiness stems from the evaluation of the life that is in the past, cannot be changed, and must be accepted (e.g. goals not realized, the plusses and deltas choices made, things that influenced how I lived my life thus far, wondering if different influences/choices would have changed outcomes, etc...). Also, not really knowing how to begin "writing" this next chapter of my life.

I feel somewhat foolish for even mentioning this. I'm so fortunate to be able to retire. Not everyone has that luxury. I know that. Yet, having this privilege doesn't eliminate the unsettled feelings. I know I will manage to resolve and quiet my thinking, but for now I have to accept the process.

My visit with dad yesterday was challenging for me. I'm glad he was talkative and I'm thrilled that he still knows who I am, but WOWZA, his mind works in new and baffling ways. Yesterday I mentioned my upcoming trip to Minnesota. I'm guessing that triggered something that caused his mind to latch on to traveling. As I was preparing to leave I told him about my dinner plans with Ron, BFF and Kathryn (who he has known since she was 4 years old). He asked if there was room in the car for him, too. I asked if he wanted to go out to dinner with us. He said no, but he had hoped that my load would have been less so I could get him over the border with less hassle. He regaled me with his story about the horrible delays suffered at the border due to the inspections and having to be moved from one bus to another bus and the hours it took to process all the old people from the busses. Once he was done I walked with him back to his apartment. I asked him if I could get him a book, a magazine or a puzzle. He replied, "No, I think I'll sit here and watch you pack." Sigh... So I cheerfully said, "Oh, I've already done all my packing. I'm all set for my travels." I got him his chocolate (my parting ritual with him) and as I was walking out the apartment door he asked me if the locked big double hallway doors led directly to the airport gates. I told him no, that there was still a bit of a way to the airport. Again, lucky to have my dad still here at 96, but all the same, it's not easy either. I am grateful that he lives in a place that offers such good care. I am grateful that 90% of the time, he is happy and content.

Well, the flight happened and I didn't get to push submit prior to take off. Now I'm in Seattle. More tomorrow. Happy weekend everyone!!!!

I don't think it is surprising or indicates being ungrateful to wrestle with these new stages in life. Your description of road trip thoughts reminds me of some of the spirals I get into when I'm supposed to be sleeping! You'll work it out as you do, but sometimes the portal to clarity and a new perspective is discomfort.

I feel like modern life is designed to have us so distracted with entertainment, social media, internet, etc that most people don't take time to think about their lives and the actions, choices, outcomes, etc. It's scary and can show things we'd rather not see or reexamine. Good for you for sitting with all of it and assessing what you want the next part of your life to look like!

Greetings all

It is a sunny day and will be warm. The air show noise has started. I will be getting out of town by going to the studio which is 6 miles away. Hope that is far enough. I found out you can take a ride in a plane that I think is a vintage WW2 thing. Not a fighter but seriously scary looking. It only costs $550 for a ride. No thanks. I can get motion sick for much less money otherwise.

Liz I am glad you were not stranded with foil hair. I used to do that. Post a bathroom pic. There are probably other decorating things to do that will make the tub look less grey. But at least that weird mural is gone.

Well Peps, think of retirement as your big sand box. Lots of possibilities. Your crankiness might be due to your dad's decline and no wonder. Sounds like he is mostly not afraid. Wonder what memories he is drawing upon. Chocolate ritual sounds like a good thing,

DD you may have an acute case of Minnesota Nice. Sounds like your BFF is accustomed to you being super flexible so you might have to push back a bit ...ie" I need your help in getting your son moved soon as I have these dinner party plans and space needs". No cue if this person can truly hear you... Enjoy movie.

Yeah CC modern life is certainly not a recipe for peace. My BFF had big gold letters up in her kitchen that said PEACE. I think the true secret is not giving a rat's ass about what other people think of you but in a way that incudes kindness and empathy and not being a sociopath.

So I will head to the gym soon which will be within earshot of the airshow and then to the studio which is not. I ate the last of the pesto chicken for lunch. Leftover pizza tonight. I have been thinking about how I need a good summer BLT. Maybe make a bowl of lettuce with tomatoes and bacon on top with a blob of mayo. Sounds like my level of cooking these days.

Yikes incoming.... gotta go. Diane S