Jun 21, 2009

306 Highest Weight
264 Surgery

257.5 6/22
253.5 6/24


Jun 21, 2009

I am finally home and all went well. The surgery was a little longer than expected and a hernia was also found that no one knew about! The first night in the hospital was hard. The pain was just intense and they had a hard time to control it. Once they got that down I got back to my room around 10pm from 1:30. Each day after that first 24 hrs I felt better. Once the tubes came out I started to feel like myself.

Being home is like walking thru heavens doors. Really...I cant describe it any other way. Sleeping in my own bed and drinking a small cup of decaf coffee is like gold to me right now.

I look forward to this new journey in my life.
1 comment

Pre- Op Anesthesia Visit

Jun 03, 2009

Had my pre op Anesthesia appt today. All went well. They actually put my mind at ease and I feel so much more calm. Of course that can change at any time! I visited the bariatric floor at BIDMC and everyone was soooooooooooo nice! I got to meet a few nurses and the nurse manager and was extrememely impressed!


Apr 20, 2009

Scheduled for a revision from my band to RNY on June 16th. I am so nervous.

Sept 26th~

Sep 26, 2007

Its been a long time since I have posted. I havent lost much....I feel like "I" failed the band. Not the band failing me. I am always sabotaging myself....ice cream, mashed potatoes, not eating my protein FIRST! ...cant seem to get enough. I am at 8 cc's and its not enough. I need more restriction. I have gotten fills and unfills...I just cant seem to get this right. Its discouraging sometimes yes but I really try to stay positive. I NEVER could have lost 50 lbs on my own and have KEPT it off! I wont give up....I wont. This journey is just not as easy as I ever thought it would be.

My Journey

Nov 19, 2006

August 1st~ Spoke to Lynn one of the nurses at Beth Israel and she went over my form that i sent in. I have to call on Friday and speak to Darlene to make my 1st appt that will include blood work, EKG, and a meeting with Dr. H and a bariatric nurse. OK! I am on my way!

August 5th~ Called and spoke to Darlene! The first date i gave her she said was available! August 16th at 9am....WOW! things are moving real fast here. I cant beleive i am really doing this.

Met with the bariatric nurse (Lynne) and the medical director (Dr. H)...the ball is rolling!!

September 6th~ This is getting more real by the day! I met with the dietician today. Got lots of info on post op eating. She also gave me a few samples of protein shakes. Had one this morning...not bad!

September 8th~ Well i guess i am sane! I had my psyche evaluation today and it seemed to go well! I am getting close! I can feel it!

September 9th~ ACK!!!!! THey just called!!! I have a meeting with the surgeon, Dr. Jones on Wednesday the 11th! This is really happening!!!!!

September 14th~ I GOT MY DATE!! Oct 11th at 1:30!

I had my surgeon consult with Dr. Jones today. Everything went as planned! Spent some time with Debbie his assistant and she doesnt think there will be any problem at all with my insurance. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed!

September 29th~ FINALLY! I am APPROVED! I have been calling every day for a week and it finally went through! 11 days preop and i was getting a little nervous.

I have been having such a hard time sleeping at night. Getting up multiple times. I have so much on my mind. Last night i layed in bed crying.....just thinking about Greg and the boys and what if something happens to me. I was visualizing say goodbye to everyone the morning of the surgery and i just started blubbering like some nutso. I need to understand the reasons why i am doing this. "the incredible shrinking womans" advice is so invaluable. I just need to listen to it and accept it. I need to turn these tears around to happy tears....happy that i am changing my life for the better....happy that i will be around for my family for a long time. Yes Joan, i will dry my tears and know that i am doing this for all the right reasons.

October 6th~ Happy Birthday to me! I spent the day in Boston pretty much. I had my pre-op testing. I met with the anesthesia Nurse Practioner and she answered all of my questions, had more blood work too. Then drove back in for a support group meeting. I really enjoyed that and had lots of answers there too.

It has been an extremely emotional day for me today. I have cried at a drop of a pin. I cant understand what is going on. But i guess all that i have read on our emotions being in an uproar right before surgery is true! I cant believe surgery is only a few days away. It just doesnt seem real yet.

October 10th~ The day before surgery. I had a therapy appt this morning and thank God i did. She really helped me focus on all the positives and we also did some relaxation excercises. I ended up having to take a xanax around noon time and it put me at ease a little bit. Might need another later tonight. Seems so unreal yet i am so scared right now. I will write again tomorrow morning before we leave.

October 12th~ Well, i am home....banded!!! YAY!! I am sooooooooooooo sore....i cant seem to sleep anywhere comfortable. Everything went smoothly...THANK GOD! I start a full day of full liquids today. Hope it goes well.

October 15th~ I am feeling stronger today. I finally attempted to sleep in my bed last night. I was sore when i had to get up a few times to use the potty but i got some decent sleep...FINALLY! I am doing a decent job of getting all my protein in....averaging 65 gms a day and my calories around 600. Full liquids for another 2 1/2 weeks then onto mushies, cant wait.

October 24th~ I am finally feeling like myelf again! YAY! I am not really limited to doing anything. The only thing i have noticed is that i get tired easily and need a nap every afternoon. Not sure what i will do when i go back to work next week. It will just take time to get back into the swing of things there i think. Thank goodness i only work 3 nts a week. I feel blessed.

My hunger has come back. I feel like i am always thinking about food. All the food that i cant eat right now as i am still on full liquids. My post op appt isnt until November 3rd. I will then be advanced to mushies. Cannot wait! Eggs, fish, tuna, chicken salad....all sounds so heavenly right now.

October 25~ I have been talking to my nutritionist and she has advanced me slowly to mushies a little early. She thinks since i have the larger VG band that is why i cant stay full and am getting hungry often. We are starting very slowly and last night i had my first mushie meal! I had 1/4 cup of tuna with may and 1 wasa cracker and OMG was it heaven just to chew!

November 2nd~ Well back from my first post op appt...its been 3 weeks and i have only lost 3 lbs. I just dont get it. I am a little dissapointed as i was expecting more than that for eating 1/4 of what i used to eat. Story of my life i guess. I will go on and keep plugging away.

December 14th~ Well FINALLY got my first fill! I am so excited to get this ball rolling. I want to see what this baby can do for me!!!! They gave me 5cc's. Everything went well. Fill was done under floro which made me feel much more comfortable. Dr. Edwards did it and he got the bulls eye on the first shot! Very impressed! Water went down fine so now i cant wait to feel the restriction i have been dying to feel for the last 8 weeks! Let the losing begin!

December 20th~ Restriction is here! I am finally feeling it. The last two nights i have had solids and havent been able to eat very much. Everyone is right...its a different full feeling post op than it was pre op. Post op fullness seems to be more in the upper chest and back for me. Scale went down too. Said 293.5 this morning! YEAH!

December 23rd~ Oh my God the holidays are killing me already. Why?? Why?? cant i have any restraint? I didnt go thru all of this for nothing! I get so angry with myself.

January 8th~ I dont understand why i keep sabotaging myself and my efforts. I do so well during the day and then night time comes and i have no willpower at all. I get home from work and eat...or i get up in the middle of the night and eat. I need another fill desperately. I emailed Angi and she told me to call first thing in the morning tomorrow for an appt...she told me the band is a tool and its not meant to "stop" me from eating?? HELLO!!!!! IF i could have stopped myself from eating too much i wouldnt have needed this surgery now would i? I thought for sure by now i would have dropped 30 lbs....12 weeks later i have only dropped 10ish. Cant blame all this on the band tho...i need to get a grip. I was given this chance and i need to run with it.

January 10th, 2006~ Oh finally...I go for another fill tomorrow. Lets hope this is the one that kick starts my weight loss. I have waited long enough.

January 12th, 2006~ 1st day of my 2 cc fill! So now i am up to 7 ccs in my VG band. Dr. Edwards tried a few times without flouro and couldnt get it so we went to xray and did it under the camera. Hurt a bit this time around. Ouch. But, here i am now hoping to God this works for me. I am looking at this fill as a new beginning to my journey here. I feel restriction with liquids so i cant wait to try solids by Monday. I am on liquids for a few days. Will update then.

January 18th~ Well, here it is! One week later from my fill and OMG i can eat so very little! I got on the scale this morning as Wednesdays will be weigh in day and i am down 4.5 pounds!!!!! Oh how long i have waited to see it move. I am not getting enough calories in i think. I am averaging about 700 so i emailed Kelly my nutritionist with some of my menus and see what she says. If i can go on safely on this small amount...heck i am not giving up ANY of my fill!


March 8th~ Its been a while since i have updated. Not much to report. Weight hasnt really moved very much. I am at 289.7 as of today. I went for my third fill and Dr. Edwards took me from 7cc's to 8 cc's. Feeling a lot of restriction with this. Lets see how it goes.

March 9th~ Oh My GOD! I am shut tight. I went to bed last night around 9pm and woke up at 10pm choking on my own saliva. I came down and tried sleeping on the recliner and that didnt work either. Then it started.....around 3 am i started vomiting saliva....every 20 minutes. I realized i am too tight. It was the longest night of my life. I called the surgeons at 8am and they told me to go right in. My mom came with me for support. Its been awful. I literally had to stop twice and barf in a bag i brought with me in the car. We arrive and we go right to Flouro. Dr. Edwards proceeds to take out 8.5 ccs! WHERE did the other .5cc's come from that wasnt there yesterday??!! He brought me down to 7 3/4 cc's andi felt IMMEDIATE relief. Thank GOD! I am home now resting and it feels good. I will be on full liquids again for 3-4 days. Looking forward to the loss!


May 13th~ Wow...how time is flying by. Cant beleive its been so long since i updated my profile here. Well, i am still losing....slooooooooooooooow. BUT...i am losing so i have to look at the positive side. I have always been a slow loser so why should this be any different? Four weeks ago i went for my 6 month check and they wouldnt give me a fill. My surgeon says as long as i am losing even if its a pound a week i am fine. He wants me to learn to deal with the psychological aspect of this as well and to learn how to use my "tool". He says too many people rely on the fills to make them lose weight and thats wrong. I do see his point...i do have restriction but i was looking for a teeeeeeeeeeny bit more to help me along. I go back in July and he said we will evaluate then. Other than that...i feel great! I just cant get over how every day is so different with this band! I say it MUST be a girl because she is so finicky!


July 12th~ Went in for my 9 month check. Everything is fine....I feel great. I wasnt expecting to get a fill because of my last visit. BUT...he did give me one. Now...how much do I have and how much did I get? I have no clue. I am actually kinda ticked over it but not much I can do. He says i have 7 cc's..I think I have more. They didnt use a syringe big enough to extract all of it so we went on an assumption. Oh well. Whatever it is...I am still on post fill full liquids and i have restriction. Thats all I care about.


July 19th~ Restriction I have is incredible. At first I was a little nervous I might be too tight. I emailed Angi and told her and she said I am fine and to stay with it. Thats what I am gonna do.


October 11th~ WOW! Its been a year?? Cant be! I spent today in deep thought....looking back to this year and how I felt a year ago today. Last year at this time I was so emotional. Well, I look forward to the year to come....I hope i continue to be successful.

October 18~ I went in for another fill on my one year check with Dr. Jones. he gave me 1cc bringing me to a total of 9ccs in my VG band. Well, after the water test I knew it felt tight but I went home anyway. I spent the next 12 hours vomiting saliva. Another horrific overfill. Drove back to the city first thing in the morning and Dr Jones brought me down to 8.5cc's ....I still felt tight and at that point i just wanted to feel better. He took it all out....plus another smidge. So, now i am just under 8cc's and I am pissed! Today as my selling goes down I feel very very little restriction. So, now what do i do? I guess I will wait a month or two and go back in for a fill only this time "I" call the shots and get 1/4 cc and go from there.


About Me
Methuen, MA
Surgery Date
Aug 14, 2003
Member Since

Friends 18

Latest Blog 6
Sept 26th~
My Journey