7 Days!

Jan 12, 2012

Wow, a week FLEW by!!  I now have 7 days until my surgery and I'm starting to freak out! 

Am I the only one to have second thoughts about this?  So close to the surgery, anyway?  I keep thinking I can just lose the weight on my own now, since I know about nutrition and how to eat well.  I mean, I guess I probably could, but I have a feeling it would all come back before I reach my goal!  And I'm SURE I won't lose weight quickly enough to have my knee surgery!  So, yeah... I guess I'm answering my own question.  Haha!

I just hope I'm on the right track with everything.  The protein drinks, the diet, the vitamins... Ugh!  It's all so much!

I'm starting to do well with the not drinking while you eat thing (still really hard to do!!) and taking small bites and chewing and all that, I just hope I can keep it up.  The bagel story REALLY freaked me out!  If any of you don't know that bagel story... it sucks.  And it's scary.  I don't care if I'm able to, I don't think I'll EVER have a bagel again!!

So, here's my problem:  Not only am I thinking that I could do this on my own (even though I know I'll never stick with it), the cost is REALLY freaking me out!  I had no idea it would cost as much as it is!  When they told me $7,600, I thought I paid 30% of THAT.  No such luck.  That's MY portion!  And then it's going to be about $2,000 MORE for other costs??  Holy cow!!  And I didn't even get my son's teeth fixed because I couldn't afford it.  That was $1,800.  But they wanted it up front, and couldn't do that, for sure.  He's 19 now, so maybe he can help me pay for it.  I dunno.  I just feel ... selfish.  Like, why would I do this when my son needs his teeth fixed and when I have a 6-year-old who just did a paper at school about a wish he would want for his family, which was more money so "we could buy more food".  Seriousl

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