beemerbeeper

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A newbie asked is it worth it? And this was my reply.  I put a little time and effort into writing this so I thought I would save it here.

Was it worth it?

I would have this surgery every year for the rest of my life if I had to in order to have the quality of life I have now.

I was 50 years old, weighed 262 lbs and I couldn't walk a flight of stairs or go on a 20 minute walk with my dogs.  I sweated sitting in AC.  I had high blood pressure, high cholesterol and high blood sugar.  The perfect storm.  Type II Diabetes killed both my normal weight parents.  I was so on my way to that.

I was sick every 3-4 months with upper respiratory illness.  I was a smoker.  I was in the doctors office every 2 months either for that or for chronic joint and muscle  pain.  PT.  MRIs.  Medications.

I had lost down to normal BMI many many times and gained it all back with more so many times I had given up on diet and exercise.  My metabolism was shot.

I wore a size 3x in clothes.  I hated clothes.  I hated shopping for clothes.  I didn't own a swim suit.

Now I am 52 years old.  I am 5'81/2 inches tall and weigh 145 lbs.  I wear a size 4 or 6 small.  Actually a lot of smalls are to big for me.  I can walk and walk.  I am not only training my own dogs but am teaching a class.  WITHOUT having to wear a hat to cover up my soaking wet head. I wear shorts and skorts every damn day every damn where.  I didn't OWN a pair of shorts or a skort two years ago.  I wore blue jeans in 100 degree weather.

I can walk stairs.  I can hike.  I have had ONE cold in two years (I quit smoking as required to have surgery and have been smoke free for 2 years and 20 days).  No more pain.  None.  My doctor doesn't know who I am because I never have to go see her.

My blood pressure? Low normal (no meds).  My cholesterol?  136.  My blood sugar? NORMAL.
I won't GET Type II Diabetes.  That alone makes it all worth it.  That alone.

I eat.  I eat when I am hungry which is about every 2 hours.  I understand that as time goes by this may stretch out to every 3 hours.  Whatever.  

I can't eat wheat gluten.  PITA.  I can't eat lactose.  PITA.  I can't eat much sugar alcohols. 

I have to watch my carbs to stay at this LOW weight for my height.  My choice.  I like being this thin and it feels normal to me so I watch my carbs.

The recovery was hard for me.  I had a hell of a time with anesthesia effects and hope to never have to have general anesthesia again (it was my first time).  I had a hell of a time staying hydrated for the first 3 weeks and had to go to the ER for fluids (no big deal).  I would go through all that EVERY year to have the results I have now at almost 23 months.

I take a lot of vites.  I know nothing about vites and labs but I know who DOES know and I listen to what they say (and not my surgeon or pcp).  I follow VitaLady with tweaks based on my labs.  I take extra calcium and magnesium because I am a bit paranoid about my bone health.

I don't exercise enough and I'm working on that.  If I exercised I could eat a lot more carbs.

This surgery did not fix my head.  It did not make me a better person or a more patient person.  A lot of people don't like me (in real life and on this forum) and I hate that, and I try to be a better person.  This surgery did not solve my love life or my social life problems.  This surgery did not solve my fiancial problems.  Or my family problems. 

But what it did do for me?  More than I can put in words. 

And everything I have to do to maintain my health now I would do in triple if I needed to and I would STILL be glad I had this surgery.

My only regret is waiting until I was 50 to change my life. 

And the only reason I am healthy today is because of a good surgeon and the vets here who pay it forward every day to people they don't even necessarily like because someone paid it forward to them.

I love my DS and I am thankful as HELL for OH.

Photos are on my blog page thing here on OH.

~Becky

Eighteen months.

I swear I don’t know where the time went.  I think at my age you just blink and another year flies by.

Due to the support, guidance, love and friendship from members of this forum I can report that I continue to have a completely uneventful post-DS life.

I am healthy.  I can physically do everything I wanted to be able to do.  The heat doesn’t kill me.  I sleep better.  The quality of my life has drastically improved.  And for those of you who know that I live for dog sports, I am training Vamp to play flyball, am starting an agility class, and walk the dogs every single day.  None of which I could do at 262 lbs.

The highlight of these last 18 months has to have been the first DS Cruise.  We had so much fun and I made life-long friends.  Being around other DSers day and night for almost a week was an amazing learning and bonding experience.  Because I have not had access to support groups with other DSers this was a week-long support group for me.  Amazing.  And the experience didn’t end with the end of the cruise.  My new friends and supporters chat with me on the facebook page set up for the next cruise and continue to help and support me.

My life has changed in a lot of major ways since my DS. If you are a newbie you should be aware that the ride may take you to places other than those where you wish to go or expect to go.  I ended a long term relationship (not uncommon) and I have moved and put my house on the market.  (Nice mountain house for sale…great price…motivated seller…PM me lol.) 

I wonder what the next 18 months will hold for me.  Living a normal life in a normal sized body makes everything easier.  But life is hard, even for skinny bitches, and the DS will not fix your head, give you love, or solve your issues.  I told you so.

Thanks DS friends.  I love you all, appreciate you all and would not be this healthy, happy (and thin) if it weren’t for you.

 

Happy New Year.

I've gained 6 lbs since my lowest weight and I am really not happy about that.  I am going to try to get back to a low carb diet and get some exercise and see if I can loose at least half of that.  If I could stay betwwen 139 and 142 I would be happy.  I do not want to be 145 and I'm afraid it is just going to go up.

I'm moving!!  In one month.  I will snow-bird until/unless this house sells.  If it doesn't sell I will try to be happy to have a nice summer house here in the mountains.  I hope I can afford to rent in Alabama and keep this house if it doesn't sell.  But oh how I hope I can sell it.

Nothing else to report.

I'll post again when I've lost 3 lbs!!!

Yes, my surgiversary has come and gone.  I'm now down 122 lbs.  I weigh about 140 and had no idea that I am not "large boned" at all!!!!  I'm the same build as my brother who has a runner's build.  Who knew?

My health seems great.  I'm waiting on my one year labs.  All 20+ vials.  Got my fingers crossed as I've been diligent about following VitaLady's plan and getting them ALL in EVERY day.

Honestly, candy is sneaking back in and I'm not happy about that.  I'm going to work on that.  Really I am.  When you can eat just about any other freakin' thing why do you even need that crap?  Old habits, BAD habits, die hard.

My dog show career is taking off.  With this weight off I have become a much better competitor.  Last weekend I drove 7 hours down to Jacksonville, FL and won FOUR High In Trial Awards (all of them) in one weekend.  I didn't make the local ladies too happy to drive down and take all their ribbons let me tell you!!!  But man, I like to win.

My school stuff (I'm in the Vet Tech program at the local CC) is also going pretty well.  I had midterms yesterday and today and I know I passed and I probably got A's.  I have next week off.  I'm leaving those books alone for a while!!

I did go through a pretty rough depression a few months back, but that has seemed to have resolved.  I am happy with my routine, my amount of socialization, my dog showing and school.  I stay busy but I get enough rest.  I don't watch nearly as much TV as I used to.  That must mean I am more active.

My closets are stock full of these TINY clothes!!  Small tops (a little too big) and size 4 pants/jeans.  Crazy.

I still spend a lot of time on OH but not as much as I'd like.  I'm looking forward to the cruise and only wish more people could join us.  Maybe next year we will have a bigger crowd. Of course nearly 30 cabins is nothing to sneeze at for our first time!!!  It is going to be a BLAST!!!

If you are pre-op and have stumbled on this blog send me a PM with your questions about the DS. 

AND NO...THE DS IS NOT JUST FOR THE Super Morbidly Obese.  If you qualify for WLS you are a candidate for the DS.  

I was hungry yesterday.  All day.  Then I read two posts from people who are struggling to eat correctly post surgery and I had a major freak-out.

So many people wrote encouraging posts to me.  They said I was eatinig like a good DSer which really made me feel good as that has been my goal.

And the scale rewarded my efforts again today with another pound and a half gone.  I am now only 97 pounds from goal.

I called and made the NUT appointment.  So I only have the pulmonology, cardiology, NUT and labs left to be finished with the pre-ops.  The last of these is in a little less than 2 weeks. 

So in a couple of weeks I hope to get a surgery date!!!

I'm refocused today.  Re-energized.  I really want to have that 20 lbs GONE before surgery and I am going to keep trying.

I think I will go look for a couple of shirts for the weekend (Durham APDT Rally trial) as I'm down a size.  I think having lost 15 lbs on my own is worth a new shirt or 2. 

I had the ultrasound and the upper GI today.  I'm telling you the folks who work at our local hospital are the BEST!!!  SO NICE.

So next week is the pulmonologist and the next week is the cardiologist.  Too bad those are spread out over two full weeks, but I'm still loosing weight so it's all good.

WARNING FOUL LANGUAGE.  IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY FOUL LANGUAGE PLEASE CLICK OFF THIS PAGE.

I drove to Marietta today for the second psych eval.  Basically a repeat of the first one with the MMPI instead of some other test and one test the same.

After we were through she asked if I was coming back to Marietta and I told her not until the 2 day education thing and she said "well I usually do a follow-up but maybe we can do it by phone."  I mean like wouldn't it have been nice if she'd told me that when I made the initial appointment so I could have run the other way?

She also asked for a HIPPA release for the psychiatrist (which the first one did not) and oh how I wanted to say "good luck with THAT."  If getting a response from my psychiatrist has to happen before she will send her report to Dr Smith it will never get sent.

So I will probably wind up doing a FUCKING THIRD psych consult.  You know the 10 fucking years I spent in therapy probably made me MORE stable than any average Jane Doe who is 100 lbs overweight out there.  But I get PENALIZED for it.  Jesus Fucking Christ it pisses me off.

me

I left at 8 am and got home at 8 am.  Long damn day.  The psych consult took 30 minutes to fill out the paper/pencil tests and 90 minutes for the history.

I really hate that I have to do this twice.  It really ticks me off.  No wonder psych patients lie so much about their diagnoses.

Next pre-op on Tuesday next week.  Gotta get some dog training done.

 

All the pre-ops are now scheduled.  The first one is this Thursday and the last is on Aug. 4th.  So hopefully this means that I will get to have my surgery in September.

I am so glad to get that scheduling done.  Now I can relax a bit, concentrate on sticking to my pre-op low carb diet, and just take care of the pre-ops as they come up on the callendar.

That is one this week, one next Tuesday, two on Wednesday, one the next week, and the last one the next week.

And inbetween we are going to Durham for a weekend and play Rally.

I am SO excited.

And also, the scale FINALLY moved today 248.5 this morning, down from a high of 262.

Yippee!!

This dieting is for the birds.  I am eating almost no carbs, writing down everything I eat, doing 20-30 minutes on the treadmill 5 or 6 days a week (in the morning) and drinking 80 oz of water (which means I am up 4 times during the night to  pee) and I am not  loosing weight.  I've lost less than 10 lbs by the doctors scale and less than 10 lbs by my scale and it isn't budging.

I am SO frustrated.  And I am freaking MISERABLE because I am so HUNGRY.

I am so ready to get this surgery done.