Home from Surgery

Dec 21, 2006

Got home last night around 5 pm.  Am so glad to be home!!  My first experience with a hospital stay was not great.  Everyone was nice and efficient, but I just can't take being away from home like that.  Plus I had a roommate who had tons of guest the whole time and that drove me crazy.

I found out after surgery that I am immune to morphine.  That was not a good time to find that out.  I woke up in so much pain I thought I would pass out.  They had to switch me to something else (can't remember the name).

Have found out today that I can't tolerate Crystal Light the same way.  It tastes way too sweet.  I'll need to start diluting it I suppose.  Sugar free Jello and Sugar free popsicles still taste ok though.

My back and shoulders hurt worse than anything.  I'll be glad when all of this gas gets out of me.  I'm hoping to feel more human by Sunday..I have three xmas things to go to that day.  

This post is probably incoherent..I just took my meds and feeling the effects.  I'll write more later.

P.S.  I checked my final grade in my Classical Humanities class today and got an "A".  WooT

Surgery Tomorrow

Dec 17, 2006

As it always is with me now that surgery is almost here I've calmed down completely.  My nerves are practically gone.

I packed my bag today and took care off all the house work and laundry.  Thank God I have a roommate..it has made my dog a non-issue.  The fact is that he's so high-strung that I don't think anyone would have taken him, and I wouldn't even dream of leaving him in a kennel.

I'm just looking forward to coming home again.  I just want the hospital part to be over soon. 

I weighed myself today and I've lost 14 lbs on the liquid diet.  I thought I would lose more but I'm not complaining.  I've decided that I'm going to limit myself to weighing every Sunday, otherwise I will drive myself insane on the scales every 5 minutes.

Well, that's all for now.  My sister is bringing her camera tomorrow to get some pre-op shots.  I have no pictures of myself right now, not even candids.  Everyone around me knows to take my picture is to take their lives into their own hands.

I'll see everyone on the losers bench!

Emotions!! What the Hell??

Dec 15, 2006

Omg, I've been so emotional today!!  I would blame it on PMS but my period just ended yesterday.

I'm nervous about my surgery Monday and just completely on edge.  I feel like I could break into a million peices at any minute.  I hope like hell they give you some Valium or something while you're waiting for surgery because I don't know if I'll make it through the space of time between check -in and anesthesia.  I could spontaneously combust!  I don't think I'll sleep all weekend.  That could be a good thing...maybe i'll be so tired when Monday rolls around that I won't even care.

I just can't wait for surgery to be over and to get back home.  I think more than anything the hospital stay is what is freaking me out the most.  I don't like being away from home.  I've never been in the hospital before and that element of the unknown is not sitting well with me.

Oh well, the good news is that I've finally finished my final paper for my Classical Humanities class and got it emailed to the Prof.  with 3 hours to spare!  Yeah baby!  It's a crap paper, but at this point I couldn't care less.  After the roller coaster I've been on for the past month I'm just glad that I could collect enough thoughts to have something to turn in at all.

That's all for now, I'm sure I'll rant more later.  It's not like anyone reads this stupid thing anyway.

Feeling much better

Dec 13, 2006

Had a hard day at work but feeling so much better now.  I'm home in my comfy PJs with my hot broth, a book, and Bob Seger (aka GOD) on my iPod.  It doesn't get much better.  (Ok, replacing the broth with Chinese would be way better, but I'm not going to be fussy!)

You Mean the World Doesn't Revolve Around Me??

Dec 13, 2006

To make a long story short, once a week I work on a special project at work that is based in a really small office (about the size of a walk in closet).  Yesterday, my boss comes in there to eat his lunch...a cheese burger and french fries!!  In that small confined space it was torture.  Of course I didn't say anything because I realize that people don't stop eating just because you can't.  But, damn, have a heart!

Today I volunteered to cover the front desk so the rest of the office can go to our office Holiday Party.  I didn't want to put myself in a situation where all of that food is right there in front of my face!  But of course the smells are drifting down the hallway and right up my nose so I'm in hell.  I'm so hungry!!  Please let this be over soon.

Getting Nervous

Dec 12, 2006

I'm starting to have my first little bit of nerves about surgery.  I've never had any kind of surgery or hospital experience so I just don't know what to expect.  I know some nerves are normal, it just makes it hard to concentrate on things like work and school.

I keep having this fear that I'm going to show up for surgery that day and they are going to tell me that it's cancelled.  We were told in our first seminar that if you go in for surgery and you have gained any weight they will cancel you.  This freaks me out!  I know that with this liquid diet I'm gonna lose a few pounds, but so far I feel as fat as ever.  I put on my jeans today and they didn't feel a bit looser.  And about 5 weeks ago I quit smoking so up until this liquid diet I had been over-eating big time!  I know I had to gain some weight there.  I just hope that whatever I lose during the liquid diet makes up for whatever I gained.

How am I going to make it though the next 5 days??

Hard Weekend

Dec 10, 2006

This weekend has really sucked!  It's been so much harder to stay on the liquid diet while being home all the time.  I thought quitting smoking would be the hardest thing I ever did but I was wrong.  Two week liquid diet with no surgical intervention is much worse!  At least when I quit smoking I had the nicotine patch.  Maybe I should try appetite suppressants..

I'm suppose to be working on my final paper for my Classics course but I just can't seem to concentrate on anything.  All I can think of is how hungry I am.  I don't know why it's been so much worse today.  I think I'll go to bed early and hope I feel better tomorrow.

I'm really gonna miss movie popcorn

Dec 09, 2006

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting I went to the movies today and saw Blood Diamond.  It was excellent.  It always amazes me to see films like this and to learn things that are going on in the world that I really had no idea about.  It really puts your own life and so called problems into perspective.  

I really think this is Leo's year.  Two amazing films and two oscar worthy performances. Djimon Hounsou was wonderful as well.  If he doesn't get a nomination this year then I have lost all respect for the academy.

Anyway, back on topic. I almost cracked when I smelled the movie theater popcorn. I think they put some kind of drug in it to make the smell so irresistable that you must have some.  I was actually at the counter ready to order and managed to talk myself in to a water instead. That was my saintly act for the day. I think I deserve a medal.

I did it! With a lot of help..

Dec 08, 2006

I literally decided to peruse weight-loss surgery the NIGHT BEFORE the new "Staff Benefit Changes for 2007" booklet arrived on my desk at work.  Imagine my horror when I read that, starting January 1, 2007, Bariatric surgery would only be covered if you were employed for at least three years and if you paid a 2500 dollar co-pay on top of your 250 dollar deductible!  (There were new medical restrictions too, but I wasn't worried about those since I met all the criteria).  First of all, I'm 8 months from being at my current job for three years and after all the soul searching and thinking and agonizing I had done while reaching the decision to take this journey I couldn't imagine being put on hold for another three-quarters of a year.  Second of all, if I had 2500 dollars I'd spread it out all over my bed and roll around in it.  I knew that my only chance at surgery was to get everything done in the two and a half months that I had before the first of the year.

I contacted Bariatric Services immediately and told them what I was going to try and do.  They were skeptical, but I told them that I was determined to try and even if it didn't happen then at least I would know that I did everything in my power to make it happen.  They supported me every step of the way.  They got me all the appointments I needed as soon as I could get them (and all of you know that there are A LOT of appointments) and I had everything I needed for my insurance submittal within 3 weeks (would have been 2 but there was an issue with my psych evaluation not being mailed when it was suppose to..But I digress).   

Everything was submitted to insurance the second week of November.  Because of the time constraint I didn't have the luxury of waiting around for my approval before I started spending money on all the many many things required for pre-op.  I had to start on everything right away, not even knowing if I would even be approved for surgery and with the very real possibility that it would all be for nothing.  I did my 75 dollar dietian visit and my 300 dollar half day bariatric class, had so much blood drawn I didn't think I would have any left, had my pulmonary testing and my EKG and my chest x-rays, met with Dr. Scott twice, the anesthesia team once, got my tentative surgery date and pre-registered at the hospital to save time on surgery day..All before I knew if I was approved by insurance.

Well, needless to say after my paperwork arrived at the offices of my insurance company I called every day to find out what was happening.  I wanted to make sure that they understood the deadline I was facing.  Every time I called I was told that my case was still being reviewed.  For three weeks it was being reviewed.  Finally, two weeks before my surgery date and after three days of being transferred to every manager in Care Coordination and leaving dozens of voice mails that were never answered (and with some help from Dr. Scott) I realized that I was being put off so that my approval would not come in time for me to get my surgery before my time was up.  Well, I snapped.  The last time I called the insurance company I let them know that I was not a stupid person, I knew what they were doing and that they would not get away with it.  I told them that someone would either talk to me or they could talk to my lawyer.  Anyway, I was approved the next day (Thursday Dec 7, 2006) and found out when put in my daily call this morning.

So as of this morning around 7:30 am everything is officially in place for my surgery.  All that's left for me to do is make though 10 more days of this horrific (bordering on cruel and unusual) high-protein liquid diet and to show up two hours prior to my surgery on December 18th.  I can't believe its happening.  I've spent the past 2 months rushing around getting everything done and I haven't had the time to sit down and take it all in.  My life is about to change forever.  I'm determined to be a success story.  When I turn 30 in June I want to be the healthiest I've ever been.

I want to say a very special thank you to the Bariatric Services team that the University of Missouri-Columbia Hospitals and Clinics.  I know they were just doing their jobs, but I couldn't have asked for a better group to depend on.  They put up with a lot from me (like daily emails full of panic) and I will be forever grateful.

I look forward to keeping up with this journal.  I will upload some pre-op pictures as soon I get some.  I can't remember the last time I allowed my picture to be taken, but now I'm looking forward to it.  I want to be able to watch my progress and to share it with everyone else.  I'm so thankful that there is a community like this full of people who know exactly what I'm going through.  I hope to be around here for a long time.



About Me
Columbia, MO
Surgery Date
Dec 08, 2006
Member Since

Friends 2

Latest Blog 9
Home from Surgery
Surgery Tomorrow
Emotions!! What the Hell??
Feeling much better
You Mean the World Doesn't Revolve Around Me??
Getting Nervous
Hard Weekend
I'm really gonna miss movie popcorn
I did it! With a lot of help..