B. Jones

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I came on here to celebrate mrshooks lost!  Then browsing through my page I realized that it has been 2 years since I have been on this sit!  And wow, what has happened in those two years!  I thank God for health and strength.  I thank him for the journey and where I am in my life now, even when I think of the things that I perceive as 'bad' and I perceive as 'good.  It is my life.  And as long as I am aware, awake, and alert I am going to learn!
I am currently at 185 lbs.  And loving it.  Yes if I wanted to dwell in the 'wishes' I wish the sagging skin was gone.  I wish I could get to a number of 150 lbs.  The wishes though are a waste of my time and energy.  I am confortable where I am and am trying to stay in the present moment and live life! 
Loving the journey.
B

Starting "Weight loss Surgery Process" weight: 371

Day of Surgery Weight: 367 08/01/08

Current Weight: 313  10/13/08

299 lbs (out of the three hundreds!  I missed reporting this one.  Oops... I am out of this one though at 283!!!  Yay  11/13/08)

2nd Goal Weight: 266 (101 lbs lost since surgery) - 12/10/2008.  wow.  hit this milestone today!  seems like it was a long time but less then five months.  mmm. now need to figure out how to get my century card!

3rd Goal Weight: 245: Current weight: 244  01/25/2009 (123 lbs lost since surgery)  100 lbs until goal weight.  It may seem like a lot left for some people.  It is.  But from where I started... I am looking FORWARD to getting the last 100 lbs off!

4th Goal weight:  199

Final maintenance weight:  145

I wish... That has been the story of my life.  I wish all the weight I had gained would just fall right off.  Now, though, with my tool, it is coming of.  It is coming off slowly then I would like but it is coming off.  Why?  I know why... because I drink (*gasps*) Juice.  100 percent pressed from apples... apple juice.  I CANT CANT drink artificially sweetened drinks.  They make me gag.  And I am having a hard hard time just drinking water... It tastes SO SO different after surgery.  Food?  The good thing is I have  a love hate relationship with food.  I would love to eat ANYTHING WITH TASTE.  But 90 percent of it, I know, wont agree with me.  And chicken... I love chicken... But my body will not tolerate it.  So I eat because I have to.  What I can eat though is very very limited.  I love cheese but that too has grown pretty old. 
So... I am happy.  It is coming off slower than I imagined.  On the other hand I have yet to lose 57 pounds in 2.5 months without starving myself.  I agree with NatalieW's post from today... To God Be the Glory! 

To God be the Glory! 

I want to thank all my friends  here who have talked with me as well as prayed with me.  I spoke to my insurance company rep today.  She said that it went to upper management... And they approved it!!!! I am so so excited!!!!!

Some of my  OH friends are wondering where I am in my journey... Thanks for keeping in touch... Havent been approved... but havent been denied either.  Have been going back and forth with the insurance company... She wants more information to prove I have been fat for more than two years... i wish I could mail her every picture I have since birth to show that.  But some of you are like me.. Since I am reasonably healthy and since  I have moved so much I dont have a long term PCP relationship.... errrr..... right now I have no PCP.  So I have been calling her and not getting her and she has been calling me... and not gettting me.  I just want her to tell me what I can give her, that I havent given her, to satisfy her that I have been obese long enough for the insurance company to feel satisfied.... So even though I am jittery.... I am still hanging in there....
You got a suggestion for me then shoot it this way!!!!
Thanks....
Stay tuned....

Have you ever thought about how life would change for you if only....?...?....?...

As I continue to wait for approval my heart pounds and beats really really fast as I think about it.  What if I am denied?  What next... So I continue to wait... and worry.... and hope..... with my fingers and toes crossed....To come SOO close...
Like I told a new friend on this site:  I can stay clear headed and think of next steps for her because of her denial.  And I hope she is there for me and clear headed if I am denied.  

mmmm....
To God be the Glory...

Until next time... Tears    or relief 

You never know who has experiences common to yours.  I received words of encouragement from two individuals who said they shared common experiences similar to mine.  One:  being timid going to the doctor because of my weight and Two:  Being very very selective about telling others about the surgery.  My good friend, who knows I am trying to have the surgery (and I told her only because I needed someone to pick me up from the hospital) and I had a falling out (someting ridiculous that wasnt my fault so pride wont let me fix).  So... if I get approved (and I am PRAYING I AM... ) then that is something else that I would have to worry about.  But if I get approved then I will find a way to work it out.... Two more weeks before submission... I have my fingers crossed... my toes crossed... my eyes crossed... You get the picture! 

Ok.  I have decided to start chronicling my own journey because I have interacted with several great people who are trying to get me through this journey.  I am learning so much from them and others on their journeys.    i am an extremely private person... so only one friend knows that i am doing this.  I am severely overweight...  and have battled being overweight my entire life but have not been sick so I have not gone to the doctor much in my life.  So I am extremely scared about what happens when my paperwork is submitted to the insurance company next month!   I dont have a documented history of being overweight and dont have a long term PCP.   But we will see how it goes.  If it is rejected.... well I guess i will cross that bridge when I get to it.