clpower
I’ve battled with my weight my entire life. As a child I was picketed on and made fun of because of my weight (kids can be so mean and adults). It stared in elementary school and just got worse when I went to high school. I chose not to walk at my high school graduation because of my weight. I was so AFRAID the kids would make fun of me when I walked across the stage. I’ve tried everything from weight watchers, liquids, protein bars, Quick Weight Loss System, Adkins, working out, etc. We were brought up not too show emotions/feelings so instead we learned to push them down with food (stressed, happy, sad, mad, depressed, angry, bored). I now have multiple medical issues (sleep apnea, acid reflux, high blood pressure, IBS, depression, anxiety) that I need to get under control. Diabetes is a strong concern of mine since it has not skipped a generation (mom, grandma and great grandma). I have missed out on so many things in my life because of my weight and the FEAR of being made fun of.
I am 41 years old single mom of a 13 year old son (single moms since he was six months old); it is time to get my life in order. He starts Jr. High and football this year and I do not want him to ever be embarrassed of his mom (again, kids can be really mean) because of my size. He would never make fun of me but his friends might and I never want him to have to deal with siding with his mom or his friends. I am 5 foot tall and 240 pounds. I had my step-mom take my before pictures yesterday and have cried off and on all day. I just did not realize I was that big. I was told my entire life that I had such a pretty face if only I would lose the weight. This just makes you feel ugly and unwanted. People do not see the person you really are they only see the outer you (a morbidly obese person). Because of my weight I have been AFRAID to live life. That all will change once I have WLS.
