daddysgrl

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Today i was posting a pic that my daughter and I took this weekend while trying on hats. I looked at my pre-surgery photo in comparison and had an OMG moment. Whenever anyone asked me about my weight loss i could always easily give #'s but I always followed up with "However i don't see any change" Looking at those 2 photos back to back I definately see the difference and all i can say is OMG!

Well Monday was my 2 month surgiversary and I'm still feeling good. Having trouble getting down all my protein. i just can't stomach the shakes anymore they make me vomit. This past month was definately a slow weightloss than the first month. Only 18 lbs this month but hey a loss is a loss and I am at 259 which is smaller than i have been in 10 years!!! I notice I have BIG carb cravings just before and during the first few day of my period which prob doesn't help with the weightloss. Next month is my 3 month check up and the Dr will detrimine if I need Hypothyroid medicine when he checks my blood work. Im very excited for what the future holds for me. i can do so much more with my 53 lb weight- loss so far and I can't wait to see what else is in store!

Here I am a little over a month and a half post op and down 52 lbs! I never thought I'd feel this good. I used to barely make it down the street without feeling like I was gonna collapse but know I can hike for 30 min non-stop and still have energy left over! I can only imangine how good it will feel when i finally hit ONE-derland! (60 more pounds to go). I still have self image problems. I look in the mirror and still hate what I see. I know I'm losing weight but I don't see it! I mean my pants fall off when I walk but all I see are fat rolls. I need my brain to catch up with my body.

After the last visit i really didn't want to go today but I made myself because I really want to get this surgery so I can have a normal life again. This time it wasn't so bad.. don't get me wrong i still got welled up. Especially when the doctor repeatedly called me morbidly obese. i mean who wants to hear that multiple times in the span of minutes. So my test results are in I have pre-diabetes well.1 away from actual full on diabetes, something called hypo-thyroid and pre-hypertension. So thats kinda a double edge sword its scary to know you have these things but then again now i actually do have co-morbidities that will help me get approved for the surgery. Four months to go until we can get approval. I can't wait.

Here i was thinking that this would be the easiest of all my Dr. appointments. Was I wrong they ask you everything! Personal and demeaning. and then they poke and prod you. By the time I got out of there i was in tears again. Is going through this process this emotionally taxing for everyone? And then the bariatritian makes a comment about this surgery being elective. It doesn't feel elective. It feels like a nessesary step after years and years of dieting and getting no where will help me save my life! I mean if a Dr. whose speciality is Bariatrics feels like that how in the world will we ever change the minds of insurance companies and small minded people who think we brought this all on ourselves?

So I had my inital consultation with my DR. it was scary to say the least and I felt so over-whelmed afterwards i went home and cried. I have a few test to do and 6 months of dieting then we will see...

So it's been  6 months since I was on here. I have been wrestleing with ideas, dieting and finally acceptance that I can't do this by myself and I don't want to be fat anymore. So Last week i attended my bariatric surgery seminar and this week i filled out and returned my packet. So here we go....