DEKat

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Well, not sure if I'm having a bit of a mid-life crisis, or just going a little crazy w/ my new bod, but since the plastic surgery, I got a "tramp stamp" (tattoo on my lower back) and had my belly button pierced.  Feel like decorating myself to show it off, I guess.  I haven't really felt the burst of energy a lot of people talk about, but when I'm not at work, I DO feel younger!

I can hardly believe it, but I had plastic surgery on May 9, 2007.  I had my breasts lifted and small implants (just enough to fill up the skin) put in, and a min-tummy tuck (just skin)!  My belly looks better than it ever has in my life--I keep checking myself out in the mirror, and it's really exciting.  I even wore a bikini on a public beach last weekend.  I definitely feel this whole makeover process (bypass and plastic surgeries) has been worth every penny I had to borrow to get it!  I'm healthier, happier, and I look GOOD!  I'm hoping I can firm my legs, butt and arms more with exercise, but in a year, if I'm not happy w/ them and can find the money, I'll have plastic surgery on them too.

Well, more excitement for me.  I've been teetering up and down by a few pounds for a month or more now--think I've just about lost all I'm going to from the surgery.  I'm only a few pounds more than I was in high school, though, so pretty happy w/ the weight itself.  What I'm REALLY psyched about is getting plastic surgery!  It's something I've dreamt of for years, but never thought would be a realistic option for me.  Now I'm scheduled to go on May 9 (barely a week away!) to have a breast lift and skin-only tummy tuck!  Those are the 2 areas that I know are not going to get better w/ any amount of exercise (the doc agreed).  I'm still hoping the thighs and butt will improve some, but if not, I'll try to get them lifted in another year or so.

I do have a gray cloud looming, too, though.  My Federal tax refund went into my account over a month ago.  I was wondering what was taking the state so long, then a couple days ago got a letter from them asking for all my medical bills and proof of payment for those deductions.  I just got all that mailed to them today, but expect them to come back to me again asking me to justify the WLS as a medical expense.  It seems crazy and prejudicial to me.  OBVIOUSLY if anyone is carrying around that much extra weight, it's harming their health.  I'm trying to take this one step at a time, but am concerned they won't grant the deductions, and will then get the Feds to take theirs back from me!

Trying to focus on the good, though.  Looking forward to my cosmetic surgeries, and planning an August motorcycle rally vacation w/ my boyfriend.

Wow!  More exciting "landmarks" on this journey.  A week or so ago, I broke the 150 lb mark.  This is particularly significant to me because it's one of the weights I maintained long-term in my life--and of course, each time that middle number goes down, it feels incredible!  I was 140 through high school, so I really can't imagine getting lower than that, but it now seems like a realistic possibility to me that I may reach that level again.

I'm going this afternoon to consult w/ a plastic surgeon.  PS is something I've thought about for years, and now feel even more desire for.  If I couldn't get any, I'd still be OK.  I don't think I look HORRIBLE naked, and do still have some hope that some of the looseness will be improved by exercise and time.  I even thought IF I was going to do it, I'd do it in the Fall--that would be a little more than a year since my WLS, and could be sort of a birthday present to myself; but a friend invited me to a PS seminar, and I got all excited about it.  I also thought the 1st thing I would look into having lifted was my butt--but the surgeons are having a special on breast augmentation for April and May, so I'm going to go for it.  My boyfriend is happy w/ my breasts now, but I do know they're not as nice as they were, and I know he'll be excited w/ the "new, improved version".  He's going w/ me for my consult today--I told him he could help me pick them out.  I'm also going to ask the doc about other procedures, but not sure I can afford anything else.

Well, I'm having some issues with body image.  I can't seem to get it in my head how small (comparatively) I've gotten.  Yesterday I bought a new suit to wear for my son's wedding, and was delighted that a 14 fit me--it never even occurred to me to check smaller.  Then this morning I was putting on new slacks my folks gave me for Christmas--they're size 12P.  They fit very nicely in the morning, and actually got a little loose by afternoon.  I decided to go back to the store and try a smaller size in the suit.  They didn't have a 12, but I tried a 10!  The blazer was too tight, but the skirt actually fit!!!  I also have to keep getting on the scale frequently again (like I did right after surgery) to assure myself that the numbers I'm seeing are for real.  I've lost 82 lbs now!!!  I'm actually at the weight now that I told the surgeon was my personal goal (although still about 30 lbs over what the charts say I should be).

I'm delighted with my loss, and feel very good overall, though I am being troubled now by loose skin (yuck), and I'm terrified of losing more and gaining some of it back.  I'd rather stay right where I am than go lower and not be able to maintain it.

I've gone to a couple support group meetings now.  I thought the first one was kind of helpful, just talking to others who'd been on this same strange journey--the last one I didn't find very helpful, but I'll try again next month before I form a final opinion.

I plan to get an "After" photo taken soon, even though I think I'll still lose some more (I'm only 6 mos out).  When I do, I'll post my horrible "Before" pic in a bathing suit.