I've been big all my life, or at least as long as I can remember. I think around age 8 I started to get chunky. From there my weight just went up and up.
I was always picked last for teams at school, and many of the other children made fun of me. Mostly I felt like an outsider and my self esteem was zero.
I went to a catholic high school and had to wear a uniform. I was so large that mine had to be specially made. It look a bit different then the others and once again I felt like I stood out.
I never had much of a social life. Boys didn't come calling on my door.
By grade 11 I was up to 200lbs.
During the summer between grades 11 and 12, I had lost 20lbs and met my husband.
It didn't take long for me to gain that weight back.
I held steady there till I was 19 and had my first daughter. I gained 65 lbs for her.
Four years later I had my son and gained 45 for him bringing my weight up to 310 lbs.
I joined an over eating support group and managed to lose 104 lbs in about 10 months but like all other weight loss attempts, it didn't last.
I got pregnant with my last child and gained 85 lbs bringing me up once again to around 300 lbs. That was 10 years ago.
I've tried many things to lose weight over the years, but nothing has worked long term.
My last attempt began in July of 2006. I lost a total of 90 lbs by Feb 2007, then that was the end of that.
By Christmas I had gained all but 5 lbs.
Today I weigh in at 321 lbs. I know I can't keep this weight on and expect to live a happy healthy and long life.
That is why I'm turning to WLS as a last resort. I need this tool to help me get this weight off and live healthy. I need the chance to start over at a healthy weight.
I know the sacrifices I will have to make and I'm willing to make them. I know with the surgery I will be forced to live a better lifestyle. There is no cheating.
I also know once the weight is off, it will be entirely up to me to keep it off. I want that chance.
I don't want my kids to have to deal with having a fat mom anymore. As hard as it was for me to be a fat kid, they have to endure the same type of teasing because of me. They don't deserve that. Only I can change it, but I need help to do it.
That's my story.