Hansi

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Wow, what a year this has been!  However, I would not change any of it now.  I am so thankful for the decision I made and thankful for the person I have become through all of this.  I am down to 138!  Yes, almost 100 lbs gone.  I now were a size 6 to 8.  I NEVER thought I would see this size of clothing on my body again but the small size is not the best part.  The best part is I feel GREAT!  I feel better than I did when I was 19.  What can I do to help you with your journey?

Well six months have gone and I have had a hard road.  I did not update because I did not want to run the risk of getting anyone down!  The good news is that I have lost 65 lbs and I am down to a 12-14 from a 20-22.  I am so excited and I love having the clothing choices that are out there for me now.  It is funny because I find myself in Lane Bryant starring at the clothes.  My mind has not come to understnad that I am not that size anymore.  People tell me that I have lost so much weight but when I look in the mirror.... I just see ME!  I notice a difference in my wrists and legs but I still just see me.  So funny.  Maybe one day I will look in the mirror and see the skinny person everyone else sees.

I am not hungery but I do miss eating at times.  The holidays were not too hard but it was strange to watch everyone else eat and see how much they over ate.  My meal choices are so much healthier and I feel like a million bucks.  I have energy to spare and hate to stay at home.  I love being on the go and around people.  Things I liked to de before but now I LOVE to do them.

Like I said I had some real problems but thank you to my family, my outstanding doctor (Paul Macik,) and a wonderful nurse (Paula.)  They not only took care of my but kept me smiling and laughing at times I did not want too nor did I think I could!  You are all the best and most loved people!  I owe each of you a part of my life.

Hard to believe I am 3 days out already.  I am doing great and still sleep a bit from the pain meds.  The pain is not bad and easily managed.  It is a little hard to drink.  Kind of feels like... when you take to big of a drink and it has an air bubble in it.  However, as each day goes by it gets easier also.  Oh, my insides sound like some sort of race course.  It just rumbles and rumbles and rumbles. It is not pain full but really makes my 3 year old laugh to hear it.

Now I can't wait to see the weight dropping off.  I have had a tinge of hunger here and there but NOTHING like I had before surgery.  If I take a couple of sips of water it is GONE.  So nice to not feel like I am starving to death.  Now I just have to work hard to get all of my vitamins and proteins in.  I am sure that I have enough storage for a lot of months to come but I want to do this the healthy way.

So here I am taking Dulcalax and drinking Miralax!  Oh someone shoot me now, LOL.  It is not as bad as drinking the paste for the upper GI but it is not my choice of drink either.  I will be glad when I get all of this down.  Then I can break out my case of Charmin and baby butt paste.  HEHEHE  Well, I might as well laugh about it. 

One night of suffering is worth it for the life time I have spent in this body.  I can't wait until 10:30 tomorrow morning when my new life begins.  I hope one day I will look back on this post and be so proud of myself and all I have had to go through to get to a healthier person.  Praying for a skinny beautiful woman to emerge at the same time.

I think the hardest part about today has been the "head hunger."  It will mess with you.  Not to mention the fact that I have half of my family here and for dinner they decided to have fried chicken, mac-n-cheese, and the best dang buttermilk biscuits I have ever seen.  They smelled so darn good I just wanted to lick one and hold a little piece in the side of my cheek until I woke up from this hell I have created for myself.  Humm, wonder if the doctor will check my cheek for contraband? 

Hope everyone else is having a great recovery or an easy time getting to surgery.

Hansi

Sitting here starting to get scared to death.  I have a "fabulous" surgeon that others recruit to have problems fixed but this is major surgery and I would be crazy to not be worried.  Five days left to the beginning of a new me.  I am super excited at the same time!  I look at the before and after pictures on this site and I can't wait to be an after!

My husband had VSG on May 4th of this year and he is already down over 40 lbs.  I am so proud of him and finally getting past being jealous of his weight loss.  It was really hard to be supportive of him when my surgery kept being denied.  I was worried that I would never get approved and that if I was not able to get healthy and skinny like him, he might not love me anymore.  I wanted to walk this challenge together and now I have the chance to do so.  I am glad that neither of us has to do this alone!

I am in my second week of No Carbs/Low Carbs.  My facebook update today was; Dear Carbs, I loved you so much but I must say good bye.  I am on the path to a new life and you will be missed but there is no place left for you.  Such a true statement!  Hard to make the changes, easier knowing I have a new world ahead of me.

I am looking forward to riding bikes, running, water skiing, and riding horses again.  I have been so afraid to climb on the back of a horse because I would not want to carry me!  I look forward to playing with my children again.  Life is going to be better. It is getting better each and everyday!

I am sitting her counting down the days to my new life.  I am excitted, ancious, nervous, and happy.  So many feelings running through me that it becomes hard to tell them apart.  Only 14 more days to go.  I pray that I will do well.  I pray that I do not leave my children behind trying to become healtier.  So many things to think about.

I am so excited.  On July 8th 2011 I will be going in for my surgery.  I just cannot wait.  I have wanted this day to come for so many years.