Jeanette_B
It's been hard, I must say.. I grew up in Korea as part of a military family and was overweight since I can remember. I grew up around small, skinny people my entire life and have always had to deal with the shame of being bigger than everyone else. I'm half Korean and I've always felt like I haven't really lived my life because I was always too ashamed to go out and just put myself out there (even if I was fat). I usually stayed quiet, silent and sedentary as not to draw attention to myself. Of course if any of you have a Korean mother, you know, that words are honest and words are harsh. There was no holding back when my mother reprimanded me for my weight. I've lived with that up until now and just thank God I don't have to hear it everyday!
So it has been hard. And there has been hurtful, embarassing times. And I did go through high school as the overweight girl and the one that came running in last when we had to run around the field for PE. I tried not showing my emotions, but the hurt was definitely there. I was always overweight. I remember when I was 10 years old I came in at 100 lbs. I naturally thought - oh - you're supposed to gain 10 pounds for every year that you live... Yikes!
I went through college still overweight, worked my way up the corporate ladder with the weight, got married, had my son, and still overweight. I honestly tried every diet and pill you could think of, and came to the conclusion that I was done. No more. I am ready for the lapband and going through this with my whole heart. I deserve this; and I deserve to live the way I want without carrying all this extra weight on me. I love my family and myself too much to not be around for them and not live life like I should.
