Can I do it???

Jun 13, 2011

A little background on my journey to WLS... My husband had LapBand 12/15/2009 and has to date lost 120+ lbs.  I have struggled with my weight most of my life and my mother has been morbidly obese most of my life.  I finally got to a breaking point where I knew I did not want to spend my life miserable like she has been (she is type 2 diabetic, has CHF, needs a hip replacement and has a staph infection that won't heal due to the diabetes and has had to have skin grafts).  I wanted to feel good about myself like my husband does!  And I was amazed at how well he had done.

I had my initial appointment on March 3rd with Dr Ian Villanueva, who also did my husband's surgery.  We discussed the options and the fact that my insurance covered all 3 surgeries.  He told me that he thought the Vertical Gastric Sleeve was the best option for me.  I agreed and began the pre-op testing.  

1st up was the EGD to evaluate for ulcers and hernias.  I did find out that I had ALOT of ulcers  and was started on  a proton pump inhibitor.    Next was a psychcological evaluation, which I am assuming I passed because I never heard anything else about it.   Then there was a sleep study, I passed but that was the worst night of sleep I have ever had!!!  Lastly was a physical from my primary care provider.  Just after my 31st birthday I found out I was approved by my insurance for my surgery!!! YAY!

Then the panic set in!  I was not sure I wanted to do such a permanent change to my body.  I didn't know if I would be tough enough or as regiment as my husband was with his postop diet and exercise.  I decided to make one last ditch effort at losing weight on my own.  I started an herbal program that a friend of my introduced me to.  I did well with it but as soon as I stopped I gained back all I had lost!  So I called to schedule my surgery for mid to late July.  However, God had other plans.  When I called, I was informed by the Dr's scheduler that he would be moving and was not going to be doing any surgeries after June 30th.  I had called on June 3rd! YIKES!  I told her to tenatively put me down for the 30th but I had to check with my employer and make sure I was eligible for FMLA and that I had enought paid leave to take off a month.  (Plus they prefer at least 30 day notice of absence!)   I went home and began to panic! My husband had just told me he would be out of town for the next 2 weeks (which has now turned into 3 weeks, he returns the 26th) and I was not sure I would be able to get everything in order in time for my surgery.  I called my employer and talked with the FMLA people and got all of that in order. As long as I worked all of my scheduled hours, I would have just enough hours in the last year to qualify for FMLA.  I called the surgeon's office back and told them I was ready to schedule my pre-op appointment.

I went for my pre-op appointment on June 8th and everything was in order.  Dr V and I had a long talk about his reasons for leaving, which I can totally understand, but I will be sad to see him go!   He is an amazing doctor and has the best bedside manner I have ever seen!  (and I work at the hospital he practices at so I have a lot of experience with Drs and bedside manners!)  We did discuss that he would be available for the first 30 days after surgery for follow up appointments, but after that I would follow up with my family practice doctor. They gave me my information packet and told me to start my pre-op diet on the 9th.

So I started my 3 week liquid protien shake diet on Thursday and I had done really well, even with my husband being out of town and having to cook meals for my three kids.  I was even able to resist eating when I went to the pool and they were cooking out. I drank a shake on the way to the pool and just kept reminding myself why I was doing this!  My best friend kept telling me she didn't know how I was doing it!  

Last night, however, I caved.  I was really stressing because I had to finish 2 papers for a religion class I am taking that were due by 9pm and I hadn't even started one of them. I stopped on my way home and bought some Chinese food.  I ate an entire order of crab rangoon on my way home!!!  Then this afternoon, I discovered some M&M's and ate those.  And finally, when I made some pizza bites for my 9 yr old (since he was the only one eating dinner) I ate some of those too!!! 

I have totally been beating myself up over this slip up!   I am going to go to bed early tonight and start new again!  Wish me luck!

Sorry for such a long post... just needed to lay the groundwork I guess!  Have a great day!

~Jessi

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