Insurance Approved!

Sep 08, 2014

I have been on OH for a little while now, reading your posts, your support of each other, and your valuable information. I initially did not want to join any support group. Honestly, I thought it was stupid; and being a very strong woman who has done a lot on her own, I figured I would have no trouble doing this on my own too. I know that if I needed to, I could get myself through this on my own- but before I go any further, I want to thank all of the members of OH. Thank you for your questions, your information, your doubts, your fears, your triumphs, your pictures and your experiences. That being said, I received a very exciting phone call from my surgeons office today... I got APPROVED for surgery! I am eagerly expecting a call back to set up an appointment with their Nutritionist and will set up a date for surgery from there. I am hoping for October, maybe around the middle, but really I am just thrilled beyond belief to have gotten this much closer!

Being that this is my first post here, maybe I should share a little bit about myself with all of you. I was not always the overweight girl, I mean most of my life yes, but there were a few years in there that I wasn't. I think I started putting weight on in the 3rd grade following the severe emotional, mental, and physical abuse of my birth father. It began when I was just an infant, but continued until I began college. As a kid, we really had very high quality food all the time. Any sort of junk food was not allowed in the house unless it was for a holiday or a birthday. It was considered 'a treat' for special occasions. When my mom and my real dad finally got a divorce (and yes, I say finally because I just could not wait for him to be gone), my relationship with food was changed forever. My mother was more lenient about food and was thrilled that she didn't have to spend hours preparing a rack of lamb with mint jelly, or stuffed morning dove. My sisters and I were just as thrilled to get to have macaroni and cheese for the fist time, and hot dogs, and what is considered to be normal kid food. I was the kind of kid that lacked confidence and really needed the reassurance that I did a good job, or did the right thing. So, sugary foods and junk foods became that reward that I had done a good job.

Of course in my early teens I was bullied and teased for being the fat kid. I think most of us were that are here. Although I played sports (basketball and ran track), I kept the weight on pretty well. When I was in 7th grade and had to do a physical for school, it was discovered that I had high protein in my urine. At the time, I probably had kidney stones that passed just before they were able to track them on film. After that, I saw a series of doctors because my mother was convinced I was diabetic. I drank a ton of water, had to use the bathroom all the time, was constantly tired and fatigued. The usual signs. It wasn't until I was in 10th grade that I was told I was glucose intolerant, and pre diabetic type 2. My doctor literally told me that if I ate one more M&M I would keel over and die. Boy, if you want to scare a kid into eating right, that's the way to go about it. I lost 60 lbs in 6 months. I was allowed 30 grams of carbs per day and no candy or junk food. With 1 cheat day a month, I would get so sick from any sort of candy or fast food, I didn't even want the cheat day. My final year of high school (I graduated as a junior), I was 5'9" and weighed about 130-140 lbs. I had blonde hair to there and legs for days and man did I look good. All of a sudden my friends were the pretty popular kids. I started college, started dating, and eventually started gaining the weight back.

I have gone through a number of health issues in my life, again, I think that is something that most of us share here. Mine began really when I was 17 and was diagnosed with Bilateral Deep Vein Thrombosis with Factor V Leiden. Basically, I had multiple blood clots in both legs due to a mutation in my genes. I would be prone to them the rest of my life. I was told at this first first to the ER and several doctors appointments after that, that I was not allowed to be aerobically active. No running, jogging, climbing, hiking, etc... Anything that really elevates your heart rate, I could not do. I even had one doctor tell me that I shouldn't ever have sex because when your heart pumps rapidly, your blood moves through the body at a more rapid pace. If there is a clot lodged in a vein somewhere, it can dislodge and travel to a vital organ causing death. So, I learned how to sit still really well. (Also contraindicated for blood clots, since that is how they form.) But, I figured the latter was the safer option. Needless to say, I gained more and more weight. I have been pretty consistently at the 260-280 range since I was 20. I am now almost 29. I have been the fat friend, the bigger girl, the beautiful face with the awful body. I once was told that I was so beautiful that I could win America's Next Top Model, if I lost enough weight. I think that was the worst compliment/insult I have ever received. I know very well would could have been and do not need to be constantly reminded of it. In fact, when someone tells me now that they think I am beautiful, or pretty, or whatever... it makes me so sad. Because I just think about yeah, except for this awful fat that I have all over me. It is like a shell that I can't crack open. 

This is just one reason out of a million I am just so thrilled that the first really, really big hurdle has been jumped and I am on the official starting road. Thank you so much for reading all of this rambling... I hope that you guys will reply with your thoughts, your comments, your support, your motivation- anything that is in your mind as you read through. I also hope that I can help even one person with my story as much as all of you have helped me. :)

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