LarsMorgan
Almost 2 Months--Feb 19, 2010
Feb 19, 2010
It's been almost two months, and I find that I am having both good and bad days. Of course, the bad days are of my own making. Sometimes I feel like I want to sabotage myself on this...and yet I've already come so far.
I've dropped from a size 28 dress size to a size 22--4 dress sizes; I've lost 66 pounds--from 318 pounds to 252 pounds; 9 inches from my waist, 5 inches from my hips, 4 inches from around my ribcage, but only 2 cup sizes in my chest...so not losing there as much as I feared I would lose. My dimensions have gone from 52/50/59 to 49.5/41.5/53.25 measures. My cup size from 46I to 42G....so still as nicely large as I remember myself, but with more definition. That's good.
I'm walking more, too. Camping. My kind of camping: SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism). Look it up. No, we are not the Renn Faire; although we do have much in common with them: We camp for weeks at a time, in a format that includes everything but the kitchen sink (and then some, if you count beehive mud brick ovens). We dress in "period" fashions, we study "period" arts and science and history. We are all very cool people, and we are usually professionals of some sort. I'm so surprised always on how many doctors, lawyers and Indian Chiefs we have in the groups. And we are people who love historical re-creation. Think of us as re-enactors like WWII folks and so forth.... Anyway, my type of camping includes tents/rvs/eductional classes in needlework, metalsmithing, leatherwork, fencing, dancing/sword and shield fighting events (this year we had Zombie Wars!!~!)/brewing/and campfire community get togethers. And of course, this year, I decided I want to study belly dance! Great for the stomach muscles and back, uses the knees more than the back, etc.
So...why do I feel like I'm sabotaging myself?
Because I am actively finding things to do that interfere with walking, drinking water. I snitched an entire package of graham crackers! That's wayyyy over the recommended serving. So, why am I doing this to myself? I suspect that I am concerned that my life will not "change" enough with the weight loss. Well, it won't. I will still be me. I have to work on ME being the person I want ME to be WHILE I lose the weight. I am getting healthier...I feel it...my meds have been reduced.
Can I be well, and my weight, and be happy with myself??? YES!!
I really need to find a support group to go to here in town besides this website; to help with these terrible thoughts that are contributing to my sabotage.
And I need to stay on my B12 shots. Part of the last two weeks has been off of weekly shots, and I find today I do not find it as hard to be on track as the last two weeks...maybe because I don't "hurt". Having Fibro, and all my other pains (back, knee)...make it difficult to concentrate and stay on track without that additional help of B12 which, believe it or not, reduces the overall pain level, raises the threshold of pain, and allows me to THINK instead of just REACT. Being on B12 makes me not "hunger" for things... I guess that vite is more important than I ever thought...and with Pernicious Anemia, even more so. The body and mind will hunger for what it is not getting enough of...and that translates into cravings. Cravings can sabotage. So...no more off the vites for any reason at all!
Okay, back on track...off to walk and drink water.
Oh, and I finally understand why I can't drink and eat at same time. No one really explained that to me before. Doesn't have to do with vomiting (which I have never had, thank you)...but with pushing things out of my RNY pouch too soon, making me feel less full, and allowing me to eat more food than I should be eating at this level of the process. Okay, NOW I get it. Now I can stick to that part, too.
Lars
0 comments
I've dropped from a size 28 dress size to a size 22--4 dress sizes; I've lost 66 pounds--from 318 pounds to 252 pounds; 9 inches from my waist, 5 inches from my hips, 4 inches from around my ribcage, but only 2 cup sizes in my chest...so not losing there as much as I feared I would lose. My dimensions have gone from 52/50/59 to 49.5/41.5/53.25 measures. My cup size from 46I to 42G....so still as nicely large as I remember myself, but with more definition. That's good.
I'm walking more, too. Camping. My kind of camping: SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism). Look it up. No, we are not the Renn Faire; although we do have much in common with them: We camp for weeks at a time, in a format that includes everything but the kitchen sink (and then some, if you count beehive mud brick ovens). We dress in "period" fashions, we study "period" arts and science and history. We are all very cool people, and we are usually professionals of some sort. I'm so surprised always on how many doctors, lawyers and Indian Chiefs we have in the groups. And we are people who love historical re-creation. Think of us as re-enactors like WWII folks and so forth.... Anyway, my type of camping includes tents/rvs/eductional classes in needlework, metalsmithing, leatherwork, fencing, dancing/sword and shield fighting events (this year we had Zombie Wars!!~!)/brewing/and campfire community get togethers. And of course, this year, I decided I want to study belly dance! Great for the stomach muscles and back, uses the knees more than the back, etc.
So...why do I feel like I'm sabotaging myself?
Because I am actively finding things to do that interfere with walking, drinking water. I snitched an entire package of graham crackers! That's wayyyy over the recommended serving. So, why am I doing this to myself? I suspect that I am concerned that my life will not "change" enough with the weight loss. Well, it won't. I will still be me. I have to work on ME being the person I want ME to be WHILE I lose the weight. I am getting healthier...I feel it...my meds have been reduced.
Can I be well, and my weight, and be happy with myself??? YES!!
I really need to find a support group to go to here in town besides this website; to help with these terrible thoughts that are contributing to my sabotage.
And I need to stay on my B12 shots. Part of the last two weeks has been off of weekly shots, and I find today I do not find it as hard to be on track as the last two weeks...maybe because I don't "hurt". Having Fibro, and all my other pains (back, knee)...make it difficult to concentrate and stay on track without that additional help of B12 which, believe it or not, reduces the overall pain level, raises the threshold of pain, and allows me to THINK instead of just REACT. Being on B12 makes me not "hunger" for things... I guess that vite is more important than I ever thought...and with Pernicious Anemia, even more so. The body and mind will hunger for what it is not getting enough of...and that translates into cravings. Cravings can sabotage. So...no more off the vites for any reason at all!
Okay, back on track...off to walk and drink water.
Oh, and I finally understand why I can't drink and eat at same time. No one really explained that to me before. Doesn't have to do with vomiting (which I have never had, thank you)...but with pushing things out of my RNY pouch too soon, making me feel less full, and allowing me to eat more food than I should be eating at this level of the process. Okay, NOW I get it. Now I can stick to that part, too.
Lars
Four Weeks
Jan 28, 2010
My name is Lars and I'm a 52 year old female that is 4 weeks from her R_en-Y bypass surgery of December 30, 2009. I had a gastoplasty many, many years ago in 1986. But I got pregnant and blew the surture line six months after (which was the plan...to get pregnant, not to blow the line), herniated, and then ended up with ulcerated stomach and some other digestian problems. I put up with them for 22 years, and then had the revision. I've gone from 318 pounds to 265 so far; 53 pound weight loss. I'm learning how to embrace the differences: eating smaller meals, eating more nutrition packed meals, and not having tons of heartburn, upset stomach and vomiting. The last three were easy. LOL.
My problems are my meds. I believe now that I need med revision because of what all I'm taking and how sick they are making me to take. I thought I had come home from hospital with a bad cold...now I suspect that the pills are the culprit. I'm on what is supposed to be Instant Release Effexor...but the bottle says SR. My PCP says I should take my Effexor, Wellbutrin (which is helping me wean off Effexor) and my Lamotrigene (which is given to me for "suspected bipolar"). And there is my Allegra. I'm allergic to Arizona it seems...to air. When my doc ran my allergy tests he found that not only was I Celiac, I was allergic to almost every tree, grass and animal that lives in my state. And the cats and dogs in my house, probably too. But I have taken Allegra since age 38 and never had a problem. Now...since surgery...problem. All these drugs carry a black box warning saying not to crush, chew or cut. And when I try...I end up with dry, intense stomach heaving that lasts anywhere from five minutes to a half hour. And hurts. A lot. My thought is "overdose reaction" because I'm getting too much at a time. So....what do I do? Do I cut them up and spread them out? Try to find something else I can use instead?
It's a quandry and I need to fix it. I have no intention of staying on everyone of the 18 drugs that I take....but some will be necessary, I'm sure. I have taken thyroid meds since 13 and I weighed 150 pounds and ran track. I don't expect the weight loss to fix that. Or to fix the other things I took meds for before I gained all the weight: asthma meds, allergy meds, and the Lyrica I use for my Fibromyalgia. And I may have to keep taking my heart med to "slow" my heart down too. That is a family trait that I finally just ended up with. And, the surgeon put me on Prilosec for uclers to keep me from GETTING them now that I am "straight piped" to my intestines. But that is six meds. Six of 18 that I take now. Oh, and I use a Bipap for obstructive sleep apnea at night. That I might keep too as I sleep great on it...though rough on my hair. But that is not one of the 18 meds currently on.
So...of those five meds...which ones can I take by cutting up or crushing? Can I crush Allegra, Effexor, Wellbutrin, and Lamictal (Lamotrigene)? If I cut them up do I have to spread them out over the day? I can open up the Prilosec and Lyrica onto applesauce or yogurt...get that....
Since this is my first post...and my first day here on site, will read the back archive posts if I can figure out how.
Right now, the rain has stopped. Time to walk the dog as first of my four for today!! I will DO this.
Lars
Every step, every day.
0 comments
My problems are my meds. I believe now that I need med revision because of what all I'm taking and how sick they are making me to take. I thought I had come home from hospital with a bad cold...now I suspect that the pills are the culprit. I'm on what is supposed to be Instant Release Effexor...but the bottle says SR. My PCP says I should take my Effexor, Wellbutrin (which is helping me wean off Effexor) and my Lamotrigene (which is given to me for "suspected bipolar"). And there is my Allegra. I'm allergic to Arizona it seems...to air. When my doc ran my allergy tests he found that not only was I Celiac, I was allergic to almost every tree, grass and animal that lives in my state. And the cats and dogs in my house, probably too. But I have taken Allegra since age 38 and never had a problem. Now...since surgery...problem. All these drugs carry a black box warning saying not to crush, chew or cut. And when I try...I end up with dry, intense stomach heaving that lasts anywhere from five minutes to a half hour. And hurts. A lot. My thought is "overdose reaction" because I'm getting too much at a time. So....what do I do? Do I cut them up and spread them out? Try to find something else I can use instead?
It's a quandry and I need to fix it. I have no intention of staying on everyone of the 18 drugs that I take....but some will be necessary, I'm sure. I have taken thyroid meds since 13 and I weighed 150 pounds and ran track. I don't expect the weight loss to fix that. Or to fix the other things I took meds for before I gained all the weight: asthma meds, allergy meds, and the Lyrica I use for my Fibromyalgia. And I may have to keep taking my heart med to "slow" my heart down too. That is a family trait that I finally just ended up with. And, the surgeon put me on Prilosec for uclers to keep me from GETTING them now that I am "straight piped" to my intestines. But that is six meds. Six of 18 that I take now. Oh, and I use a Bipap for obstructive sleep apnea at night. That I might keep too as I sleep great on it...though rough on my hair. But that is not one of the 18 meds currently on.
So...of those five meds...which ones can I take by cutting up or crushing? Can I crush Allegra, Effexor, Wellbutrin, and Lamictal (Lamotrigene)? If I cut them up do I have to spread them out over the day? I can open up the Prilosec and Lyrica onto applesauce or yogurt...get that....
Since this is my first post...and my first day here on site, will read the back archive posts if I can figure out how.
Right now, the rain has stopped. Time to walk the dog as first of my four for today!! I will DO this.
Lars
Every step, every day.
