Lisa H.
25 days and a lifetime to go
Apr 24, 2011
In exactly 25 days I will be having my lap band and gastric placition surgery. Am I excited? Heck yes! Am I nervous? Even more so. I have been obese my entire life. Even as a child age 7, I remember the shame when I realized I had tipped the scale at 102lbs. Today, I currently weight 315 and my highest weight was about 390. Those were dark days that I never want to return to.
I'm afraid of so many things. Ive always had my weight issues to lean on as a crutch, oh I never finished college because I was depressed about my weight, Oh I never had a boyfriend because I have confidence issues, I don't want to go out with friends because I hate being the fat friend in a group of average pretty young women. There are grains of truth in all that I just mentioned but I think the overall issues are much bigger than mere pounds on the scale. But even more than that, I'm afraid I will fail. That I will put all this money into a life changing surgery and I will never reach my weight goals. I guess all I can do is breathe deep and trust that the universe lead me to WLS for a reason. And trust that I will learn how live on the way.
2 comments
I'm afraid of so many things. Ive always had my weight issues to lean on as a crutch, oh I never finished college because I was depressed about my weight, Oh I never had a boyfriend because I have confidence issues, I don't want to go out with friends because I hate being the fat friend in a group of average pretty young women. There are grains of truth in all that I just mentioned but I think the overall issues are much bigger than mere pounds on the scale. But even more than that, I'm afraid I will fail. That I will put all this money into a life changing surgery and I will never reach my weight goals. I guess all I can do is breathe deep and trust that the universe lead me to WLS for a reason. And trust that I will learn how live on the way.
