MeyMey
Excited and Terrified At the Same Time
Apr 07, 2015
In December of last year, after spending a year working with my doctor, I finally came to the decision that I was ready for weight loss surgery. And all at once a weight lifted from my shoulders. Now don't get me wrong, we had been talking about it and researching it and hearing the success stories and the struggles. So I knew that this wasn't a magic wand procedure that would have me waking up a skinny minny. I just knew that for once in a really really long time, there was a light at the end of the tunnel when it came to my health and my weight. I wasn't worrying about whether or not I'd leave my daughter motherless at a young age. I was looking forward to all the things we could do together once I was healthier. I wasn't feeling depressed. I was feeling hopeful, excited.
At the same time, I was terrified. What if I couldn't stick to the diet...what is the diet...what will people think or say? And then I started the process. Attended the seminars and trainings. Learned that this is a disease and that surgery is my best option. It's not an out. It's a tool. And it's up to me how I use this tool Then yesterday I began the 3 month liver shrinking diet. Now I'm not going to say that my excitement made it all easy, but I am thrilled that my determination and readiness for a lifestyle change has allowed me to keep moving forward, one day at a time, with a positive feeling that yes, I can do this. To the gentleman I just passed in the hall with a slice of delicious smelling pizza, you cannot defeat me...or rather I will not defeat myself. I will have my protein shake and remind myself that health is more important than food. Plus, I can have a yummy healthy protein and some delish veggies for dinner. Right?
I decided to write a blog for myself. Because I know my friends and family are going to get tired of hearing from me every day or every week about how amazing I am because I didn't eat carbs today and how I did it again, passed up on dessert, and how hard it is, and boy that pizza smelled good I sure wish I could have some, but no, I can't but it's hard, and on and on and on. But I figured if i write it all down, one step at a time, I can look back and see how far I've come when I'm feeling down or just need a reminder of why I'm doing this.
Thanks for listening. Hope you're having a great day!!! 