Middlesgirl
First post four years too late!
Jun 09, 2008
Here I am, on the eve of meeting a new friend in my area, realizing that I should have kept a running tally of my progress. I suppose, I never thought my story was really that important or that inspiring. Perhaps, I needed to think more of myself, and this optimism could've been responsible for wonderful things in my life. I say, better late than never!!!
I am frequently asked if I see my WLS as a success. The person inquiring has no idea how complex a question this truly is. Let's see...I started out at 346 lbs., lost 100 pounds in 100 days, dropped 213 lbs. at my lowest, and now reside around 145-150. Did I lose the weight? Yep. But what people need to understand is I have not had the textbook WLS experience. I have, and continue to still, vomitted since my surgery. It hasn't mattered what I ate or how small I cut the bites into, it ALL comes back up. It's not hard to lose large quantities of weight when you are puking it all back up. I had an Upper endoscopy done Dec 2005, and nothing seemed wrong. It's now June 2008, and I am still in the same boat. I have discovered Zone Perfect bars, and by george, I can keep SMALL quantities of them down at a time. So I exist on these and protein shakes. What I wouldn't give for some grilled chicken and veggies...
That being said, in the past several months, I have regained about 15 pounds. How? No clue. Medications have been changed, but otherwise, my eating habits (or lack thereof) haven't. I am getting more protein now than I probably ever was, and somehow, my body does not like it. So, I am trying to retrain my body into accepting the healthy foods so I have the energy to tone up this skin jalopy I call a body.
The sad part, IMO, is this. When I look in the mirror, I still see a fat chick. I am 5'10", and no more than 150 lbs. I KNOW I am not fat anymore, but my eyes refuse to acknowledge that. I leave for Florida in a couple of days, and honestly dread going to the beach because I know that requires a swimsuit. If it wasn't for all of this skin, I would be ok I think.
So, am I a success? That's debatable. My labs are atrocious, and my family doc believes I may be less healthy than when I weighed 346 lbs. Healthwise, I was fine--just fat! Would I have WLS again? I think so. But, if I knew then what I know now, I would've thought long and hard about it. I really hope I haven't put my health in jeopardy in my pursuit to be thin.
I am frequently asked if I see my WLS as a success. The person inquiring has no idea how complex a question this truly is. Let's see...I started out at 346 lbs., lost 100 pounds in 100 days, dropped 213 lbs. at my lowest, and now reside around 145-150. Did I lose the weight? Yep. But what people need to understand is I have not had the textbook WLS experience. I have, and continue to still, vomitted since my surgery. It hasn't mattered what I ate or how small I cut the bites into, it ALL comes back up. It's not hard to lose large quantities of weight when you are puking it all back up. I had an Upper endoscopy done Dec 2005, and nothing seemed wrong. It's now June 2008, and I am still in the same boat. I have discovered Zone Perfect bars, and by george, I can keep SMALL quantities of them down at a time. So I exist on these and protein shakes. What I wouldn't give for some grilled chicken and veggies...
That being said, in the past several months, I have regained about 15 pounds. How? No clue. Medications have been changed, but otherwise, my eating habits (or lack thereof) haven't. I am getting more protein now than I probably ever was, and somehow, my body does not like it. So, I am trying to retrain my body into accepting the healthy foods so I have the energy to tone up this skin jalopy I call a body.
The sad part, IMO, is this. When I look in the mirror, I still see a fat chick. I am 5'10", and no more than 150 lbs. I KNOW I am not fat anymore, but my eyes refuse to acknowledge that. I leave for Florida in a couple of days, and honestly dread going to the beach because I know that requires a swimsuit. If it wasn't for all of this skin, I would be ok I think.
So, am I a success? That's debatable. My labs are atrocious, and my family doc believes I may be less healthy than when I weighed 346 lbs. Healthwise, I was fine--just fat! Would I have WLS again? I think so. But, if I knew then what I know now, I would've thought long and hard about it. I really hope I haven't put my health in jeopardy in my pursuit to be thin.
