Amanda F.

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I have been away from the computer for a few days. Just been really focused on making changes to my diet and my life. So far, I am doing great. I am really proud of myself. I've been taking my medicine every day. I've been eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner with about 4 hours between meals. If I get hungry between meals, I am eating healthy snacks like sugar free jello, light nonfat yogurt, or fruit. I don't eat snacks very often, but when I do I try to limit myself to 1 snack a day. I am drinking lots of water. I have pretty much eliminated diet soda. I got some Wyler's. It's a generic brand of Crystal Light. It's cheaper and it tastes pretty damn good. Sometimes I feel like I'm cheating when I drink it cuz it taste sweet but it's sugar free! We went grocery shopping yesterday and we got a lot of healthy foods. Fruits, vegetables, fat free everything! Clay is doing this with me. He needs to lose weight too, although it seems like I am more commited to this than he is, but at least he is supporting me and my choice to buy healthier foods.

I kinda cheated yesterday tho. We bought these fruity freezer things for the kids and I had to have one. It wasn't sugar free :o(. I also had some "movie theater butter" popcorn. I'm sure it was pretty fatty but I am not gonna let that get me down. I am picking up where I left off and keep going. I had a bowl of Special K with 2% milk for breakfast. I will be ready for lunch in about an hour. I can't even explain how good I feel. I have more energy, I can do more around the house, I don't feel so useless anymore and this is just the beginning!! I am changing my life and I am so proud of myself for sticking to this. I just pray that I will continue to do this good. Keep me in your prayers!

We are working on getting a membership at the YMCA so we can use the excersize equipment and the pool. I have a booklet with all their programs in it and there are several things I'm interested in. With a membership, they have free water arobic classes and other excersize classes. They also have great programs for kids too. We went down there to get information about joining and the girl told me that they have a finacial aid program where they can help with membership fees for families who need help with paying the monthly fees. I got an application for that. I am waiting for Social Security to send me and Clay our proof of income letters. We have to turn those in with the application. I am praying we get it.

Well, that's all for now. I have my monthly PCP appointment on Tuesday to check my weight. I will update then and let you know if I have lost anymore weight. Either way, my doctor will be happy with the 13 pounds I lost already!

I arrived at the clinic at 10 am. I had my vitals taken. My blood pressure was up, but everything else was fine. I was weighed and to my amazement, I lost 13 pounds since I was weighed at my Primary Care Doc about 2 or 3 weeks ago. I think a lot of it has to do with me being back on my antidepresants. Needless to say, I am happy about the weight loss. I will be working on losing more.

Then I saw the nutitionist. He came in and told me about how my body would would react to certain foods after surgery. He told me what I would be able to eat and what to stay away from. He talked about the 3 week period after surgery where I would be restricted to liquids only. Most of this stuff I already knew, but there were a couple of things he talked about that were pretty helpful. I talked about my eating habits, which aren't very good. He said it is important to eat throughout the day because I need to prepare myself to eat 4 to 5 smal meals during the day. My main problem is going for a long period of time without eating and when I get ready to eat, I am so hungry and that is when I eat large portions. Right now I am going to work on eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner on a schedule. I am going to work on drinking more water and less diet soda.

I saw the physcian next. I had a routine physical and we discussed the surgery in a little more detail. She explained everything to me. Most of it I knew already, but there were a couple of things I didn't know.

Lastly, I saw the phsychiatrist. It went well. I talked alot. She began to explain the surgery to me. I talked about my depression and a bunch of other stuff. She told me it was very important to take my meds regularly. They want me to see another psychiatrist to have my meds evaluated and to make sure I am on the correct dosage and whatnot. She also expressed how important it is for me to eat 3 meals a day. I have to start with that and work my way into eating 4 to 5 small meals a day. All in all it was a good experience. I got a lot of information. Now that I have officially started this journey toward WLS, it is becomming more "real". It is somewhat overwhelming. There are lots of things I need to change, and they are pretty huge changes. I am worried that I won't be able to do it and stick with the changes I need to make. I keep thinking about all the things I will no longer be able to eat after surgery and honestly it kinda hurts to know that the sweet stuff I enjoy now will no longer be an option after surgery. This is a huge step for me and I'm not sure if I can handle it. I am going to give it my all and pray for the best.

Tomorrow is the big day! I go in for my very first Weight Loss Surgery appointment @ the Duke WLS Center. My appointment is @ 10am. They say I will be there at least half the day. I have to have a pysch evaluation and a nutrition consultation. I have all my paperwork filled out. It took me about 2 hours to fill all those papers out yesterday. I am a little nervous but excited at the same time. I can't believe I am actually gonna do it this time. I've made several attempts at WLS but there was always something that kept me from doing it (mainly money). With the help from my mom, I am able to do this now. I will update you all tomorrow evening about how the appointment went. Wish me luck!

I usually blog on MySpace, but I will just copy and paste my blog entries here for you guys to read also.

I went to see my eye doctor today (Dr. Jaffe). It's been a while since I went in to see him. I started having some pain in my right eye. Nothing too serious, but enough to be concerned. It started on Monday and has been bothering me ever since. It's not hurting right now though. Maybe it's because of the numbing drop the nurse put in my eye to check the pressure. Anyway, He checked my eye. He said everything looks fine and that he didn't see any explanation as to why I was having the pain. I go back to see him in about 4 or 5 months. I'm just glad that everything looked OK.

My weight loss surgery appointment is coming up on Monday. I can't wait. I'm a little nervous though, but I think everything will turn out fine. I will be there for at least 4 or 5 hours. I have to have a nutrition consultation and a pysch. evaluation. I'm not sure what else will take place, but I'm sure I will be weighed and get checked out by a nurse or doctor. I'll leep everyone updated. I still have about 2 hours worth of paperwork I need to fill out before my appointment Monday. I need to get started on that ASAP!

OK, I know you all have heard this before, but I'm gonna say it again. I am going to start trying to lose some weight. I have a plan in my mind that I am going to try like hell to stick to. Now that I am back on my meds I feel more motivated. I still have low energy and I feel so lazy at times but at least my mental state is 100% better than it was before. I'm really hoping I can do it this time. Just keep praying for me. Please pray that God will give me the strength and will power to follow through this time.

Thanks so much for all your support!