NidiaB
I have always been overweight...in fact, I don't ever remember a time when I wasn't struggling with my weight ...even as a child. I started dieting at my parent's insistence at about 5 years old (their idea, not mine) and the cycle of weight loss followed by weight gain began back then and has continued throughout my life.
Anyway, I figure throughout my life I have probably lost and gained thousands of pounds. In fact, I am a great dieter - when my mind is set, I can stick to a healthy eating and exercise program and have no trouble losing weight at all! Seemingly, the only trouble I have is making those changes permanent lifestyle behaviors and in keeping lost weight off, for good! Unbelievably, there have been 4 times in my life where I have lost a hundred pounds, or more; and countless periods where I have lost anywhere from 30-60 lbs. My last major attempt to lose weight on my own was about 5 years ago.. I had been considering gastric bypass surgery, and then decided to give it another "go" on my own. I developed a good diet plan for myself, much of it based on principles of the South Beach Diet. I focused on protein, good complex carbs, and shunned all sugars, white processed flour, and unhealthy starches. I tracked my intake on fitday.com and kept a food and personal journal. Over the course of about 15-18 months my weight went from 325 lbs to about 150 lbs, and I felt great!
But, and here comes the tough part.... I felt deprived, and hungry, and although my will-power and discipline were strong for a while, the changes only lasted so long... Slowly, I began taking "days" off from the plan, and once that slippery slope was under my feet, it became second nature to revert back to my old way of "over"eating and making poor food choices. Before I knew it, the "new" healthy lifestyle was a thing of the past...and once I "lost" my focus, it became more and more difficult to find.
Looking back, as soon as I started to slip, I should've found some help or some support; but instead I stayed off the scale, eventually stopped journaling, and just ate...literally whatever I wanted, when I wanted it!! Needless to stay, I gained almost all my weight back, and very, very quickly.
Shooting forward to November 2006, my weight was at 299 lbs, and I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes... This time, my PCP, actually suggested that I look into gastric bypass...but yet again, I chose to try and lose weight on my own. Well, the new incentive of diabetes and improving my health worked for a while, and I did lose about 70 lbs or so, but eventually I slipped back into old habits and re-gained some of that weight as well.
This past Spring, with my weight at about 270, my last PCP visit revealed high cholesterol, elevated liver enzymes (due to fatty liver), borderline hypertension, and of course, the diabetes (controlled with metformin.) I took a long, hard look at myself, and decided that I needed to end the weight struggle, stop the diets, get healthy, and seriously consider the need for surgery. Clearly, I need more help with my weight issues than what I have been doing my entire life, as current evidence shows it has not worked. I am really hoping that by choosing the surgery and adapting to a new lifestyle, that my health will return and I will finally get to a comfortable weight, and KEEP it off!
My goals are more realistic this time around, I am not fixated on attaining a specific weight or a specific clothing size... What I want is to cure my diabetes, and get my cholesterol and blood pressure into a healthier range. I know that the surgery will require significant lifestyle changes, and that I will need to make sure to adhere to a strict vitamin/mineral schedule in order to avoid deficiencies. I fully expect that all the post-op changes will result in significant weight loss, but to me, my goals are to live each day making good food choices, eating appropriately-sized portions, exercising regularly, and living the life of a mindful, active, and healthy individual; and I think this surgery will help me do that. The weight I lose now, is weight that I NEVER want to regain again, and I am going to make sure that I do everything possible to make that my reality.
So, wish me luck, and hopefully I can join you and others on the road to good health, weight loss, and most importantly, adopting the permanent lifestyle changes necessary to keep us on that road forever. Remember, whatever gets us well, keeps us well...
