ninjachik1979
been a long time...but here I go!!
Dec 05, 2008
Well, as I sit here and listen to American Boy by Estelle I am overcome with joy. I have been working on me and my family. I decided to give a try for the lapband, which my doc, hubby and I all decided would be the best for me. I had my final appointment with my doc on Wednesday, insurance was submitted....and guess what? It was approved. Wait, let me say that again..YES THANK YOU LORD. IT WAS APPROVED. I feel down to my knees and cried and screamed. This is it. This is the day I have dreaming about for years...the day that I know my weight will soon no longer be a dangerous and limiting force in my life. I feel like doors are unlocking as I speak right now. I feel as though God is reaching out and persoanlly blessing me. I feel as though my puzzle is more complete....my family, my love, my goals in life...my needs, my wants and my hopes are coming closer.
I can be the full-time soccer coach instead of the fill in. I can hike the mountains and the water falls with my family instead of them waiting on my wheezing tired tail. I can shop in a regualr section where the material for the but of pants is not the size of a couch. I can sit in regualar seats. I can stop taking blood pressure medincine because it won't be stupid high. My self confidence will increase. Diabetes will stop knocking at my door. Good bye sleep apnea. My bones and joints will love me again.
I am in the here and now....not wondering what it would be like.
No embarrasment about eating in public.
I am ready to retrain myself and understand that food is for survival, not for emotional support.
EXCITED
I can be the full-time soccer coach instead of the fill in. I can hike the mountains and the water falls with my family instead of them waiting on my wheezing tired tail. I can shop in a regualr section where the material for the but of pants is not the size of a couch. I can sit in regualar seats. I can stop taking blood pressure medincine because it won't be stupid high. My self confidence will increase. Diabetes will stop knocking at my door. Good bye sleep apnea. My bones and joints will love me again.
I am in the here and now....not wondering what it would be like.
No embarrasment about eating in public.
I am ready to retrain myself and understand that food is for survival, not for emotional support.
EXCITED
upset for all the wrong reasons
Jun 25, 2007
So, I have been thinking about the gastric bypass again....my doctor set me up for the blood work, nutritional and pysch eval....and of course, just like I thought....the pysch eval was a disaster. Thank goodness it was my pysch doctor who denied me. I just have to many issues with my family and I am always depressed, but I hate taking meds...they make you gain weight and I never have any energy while I am taking them. So, here I am again relying on myself to get shit done.
That is ok though, I have managed to go from 288 to 270 since May. That is about 20 lbs. I know my weight will flucuate this summer because I am not killing myself in the gym. But, time to get my butt out of the dumps and "soldier up".
That is ok though, I have managed to go from 288 to 270 since May. That is about 20 lbs. I know my weight will flucuate this summer because I am not killing myself in the gym. But, time to get my butt out of the dumps and "soldier up".
