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November 26, 2013

It's been a few months since I've posted anything. The weight is coming off slower. I had about 3-4 weeks where I plateaued out at 232lbs. I managed to get over that and am down to 218 maybe less. I have my check up on December 6th and was hoping to have lost 100lbs by then but I'm still pretty happy with what I've gotten off. 

I havent been into the gym in over a week.  I'm going in the morning though. I'm itching to get a work out in I lost my mom on November 15th to colon cancer and have been focusing on family and other things.I don't think it's hit me yet the Mom's gone. She's not been herself for a few months. She just kind of faded away. I miss her terribly.

I have dropped another pant size down to a 16. I'm pretty happy about that. I've been going to the good will because I don't want to spend alot of money on clothes that are going to outgrow me. I'm really seeing the changes in my arms and chest. My arms have visible muscle even though I have alot of droopy skin. I have collar bones too. The bummer is my boobs are gone. I've gone from a 44F to a 38C but that's ok it's well worth it and they make some good padded bras nowadays.

We're going to Las Vegas this week for a football tournament my son is in this week during Thanksgiving. He's super excited and we cant wait to ride he roller coasters. That's been a goal of mine. I'm kind of nervous, not about riding the roller coaster but about fitting on it. My husband said not to worry that I'll fit. Another goal was to ride horses again. I recently went with a close girlfriend and was actually able to get on from the ground without a step or the tailgate. I just pulled myself right up. Piece of cake. I was thrilled. Now that I'm writing about my accomplishments and seeing it I can appreciate them more. I forget it's a journey and to not be too hard on myself. A few things I want to work on is getting my water in and protein and vitamins. I've been of work for a couple of weeks and am off my schedule so I need to focus on those things. Well guess that's it for now.

This week I had my 3 month post surgery recheck with my Surgeon. It's actually been 3 1/2 months and it was with his PA Kristen but that's ok. I'm down a total of 68lbs, 54 since surgery on May 22. My BMI is down to 36.2 from 46.2. My fat has gone down 10% as well. I'm pretty happy with that. Kristen say's I'm averaging about 15lbs a month which doesn't sound like much to me but I'll take it. Any weight lost is better than weight gained right? Also she said of the 30lbs I'm down since my last visit 29 of it was fat and only 1 muscle. I'm always worrying that I'm losing muscle because of the skin sag I guess but I'm keeping up on my protein shakes and water. It's the vitamins that are hard to get in. I'm good during the week. I just bring my vitamins to work and have them right in front of me to get down throughout the day. It's the weekends when I forget. I think I need to put them in a snack baggie in my pocket as a reminder on the weekend. We're never home or in one spot for too long especially now that waterpolo and football have started for my boys.

Kristen was pretty excited about my progress so far and I should be too even though I've seen many people on here have much larger results in lbs lost but I really can't complain. She's says if I keep on this route I'll be under 200 by my appointment in Dec. I can't fathom that since it's been more than 25 years since I was under 200lbs.

Physically I'm feeling great. I don't feel like I'm limited to what I eat just how much and that's still a learning lesson. I was told I would'nt eat steak or Tri Tip for a year but I'm able to get them down no problem just chew chew chew. That's pretty much it with everything. I do notice I have to be careful and watch my sugar intake. I try to keep it under 10 grams per serving to avoid dumping. I have a problem with coffee because I love my flavored creamers and no one's been able to come up with a fat free sugar free creamer so I have to choose the sugar free or risk dumping to avoid the fat. I've learned better to avoid the sugar than the fat. Dumping sucks! I can still have a chocolate chip cookie or a mini candy bar on occasion but like frozen yogurt or ice cream, even just a 1/4 cup will cause problems. Basically it starts with slight nausea and cold sweats and I end up on the toilet within 30 minutes. So not worth it. 

I'm going to the gym pretty regularly, at least 3-4 days a week. I notice if I miss more than 2 days in a row I get cranky and am itchin toget back in. My exercise of choice is the eliptical because it's easy on my feet and ankles. Anything else kills them. I tried walking on the track at my son's high school. After 2 laps at a pretty good pace I tried jogging, something I haven't don in at least 15 years. I made it about 50 yards so I walked and jogged intermittently until I made it a complete lap around the track. I was pretty proud of myself! Boy did I pay for it that night! My feet and ankles were on fire. I had to soak them in ice water and take advil. I was still in alot of pain the next day and couldn't make it to the gym. I think I need to get a bit more weight of before my feet and ankles can take the pounding. I did try the treadmill but that hurt to so I'll stick with what works. I do try to work on cardio one day and strength the next to keep up my muscle. I notice I'm finally able to see some muscles in my arms legs. My stomach is even beginning to feel a tiny bit toned except for the apron. Not sure what I'm going to do about that yet. Skin removal surgery scares me.

I have been getting alot of compliments from friends and people in town I see. Some I have told I had surgery some I haven't. I kinda feel like I'm cheating because it's coming off so quickly so I just tell people I"m on the Biggest Loser regimen. I do want to try the Insanity workout to change it up. I'm not sure if I could handle it yet but it definately gets results from what I've seen on youtube.

Let's see. What else. Oh my measurements; Chest I'm down 6 inches from 50 to 44, Waist down 7 1/2 inches from 49 1/2 to 42, Hips down 7 inches from 55 to 48. Now that I'm seeing those numbers I'm pretty excited. 

I've really noticed a difference in how my clothes fit. I've had to buy new yoga pants because my old ones literally fall off. I took them in in the waist because I figured they're fine for around the house. I also took in a couple of my summer skirts that I love but I won't be needing them next summer. A few weeks ago I filled up 2 45 gallon garbage bags of clothes to take to the Good Will. That was pretty exciting. I'm down from a 24 on top to a 16X18 and 24X26 in pants to an 18X20. I just bought a pair of size 18 jeans and sat on the floor in the dressing room and cried happy tears because I haven't been this size in over 18 years. Those changes and the reactions from people that haven't seen me in a while are what fuel me. But also that just knowing that what I'm doing is going to lengthen my life. My health and well being are ultimately why I began this journey. Looking good is a perk.

I had several goals in mind when I started this. One was to be able to ride horses again, to fit in a roller coaster, to be able to cross my legs at the knees. I have acomplished one goal. I can now cross my legs like a lady. I haven't done that in years and it feels so good. And a couple of weeks ago my 13 year old said, " I can't wait until we go to Las Vegas this year mom because I know you'll be able to ride the roller coaster at New York New York. You could probably ride it now." That brought tears to my eyes that he was excited to do that with me. I have a couple of goals I want to add, snow boarding and paddle boarding.I've never snow boarded but was an avid skier growing up and skiid until I was about 33 and 260 and just too big to do it.I've never paddle boarded but I'm a Pisces and a total water girl. I love to swim and be in the water  and grew up water skiing. I have pretty good balance and with some work I think I could do it. Living near the ocean brings me peace so being able to be on a paddle board on calm water on a saturday morning sounds like heaven to me. 

I think that's it for now. I'm just going to continue doing what I'm doing and enjoy the new found health and strength my body is showing me.

Well I'm 2 months and 5 days post op and down 51lbs! I should be pretty excited but not feeling so much because I'll go 2-3 weeks and only lose 3lbs then lose 5 in a week. I've been very busy with family activities. Really trying to concentrate on getting my water protein and vitamins in.

Went on vacation and had a hard time getting anything down. Everything I ate plugged me up and I had to get it up and out or be miserable. I've learned it's very difficult fo me to eat around others because it seems everyone is in a rush.I'm always the last to finish and my food is usually cold before I'm done. When eating out I try to eat the soup and salad. Soup's the easiest thing to eat. Beef, white meat chicken, pasta and of of course bread are the most difficult things for me to get down. I don't have a problem with foods making me nauseaus so much as getting stuck.

I have experienced dumping once. Was craving some frozen yogurt. Could not find sugar free anywhere. Drove to 3 different places 12 miles apart looking. Finally I decided on vanilla and ordered about 1/4 cup. I savored it the whole way home but by the time we pulled in the drive about 20 minutes later I was feeling queesy, clammy and had stomache cramps which of course ended up in diarhea. I haven't done that again. 

All in all I feel like I'm doing really well. I'm going to the gym 3-4 days a week, having a protein shake a couple times a day to get in my protein, drinking about 48-60 oz of water a day and taking my vitamins. The most difficult thing is my iron. It's a liquid and horrible.I may have to find another. I'm looking into the Celebrate vitamins at the moment. I also need to find a good calcium citrate vitamin as the one I'm taking is not as absorbable. Guess that's it for now.

Well I've officially passed my 2 week post op mark! Feeling good. A week after surgery I went back and had my drain removed. That was pretty horrible. I would have to say worse than the surgery. I had been dreading it for weeks because I've had drains pulled before. It was as gross as I thought it was going to be. Kristen my PA had me lay down and take a deep breath and blow out but I just yelled. It fellt like a snake writhing around and out of me and I got a sharp pain in my left side as she pulled. Then 30 seconds and 2 feet later it was out. I was so releived to have it out of me. My day usually consists of taking my vitamins, a must, drinking a couple of shakes and testing soft soup like foods. So far any soup works as long as I chew up what's in it. I also can handle refried beans mixed with some green salsa and a little shredded cheese. My first week out I used Lactaid Milk to make my shakes with just in case I was a touch lactose intolerant but I think I'm ok with milk. A few days ago I tried some chicken enchiladas, about 2 tablespoons full and 2 tbsp of chopped salad. It was a bit much and I ended up with a stomach ache half the night. I noticed as long as I chew food until it's broken down to a cream of wheat consistency I'm ok but I had some scrambled eggs and they wouldn't go down. Also some watermelon that wouldn't go down so I have to be careful. I'm really trying to get in my protein but it's pretty tough. I do notice I get tired and need a nap around 1:00 them I'm good for the rest of the day. I went to my Dr on my 2 week mark and I'd lost 12lbs since my surgery so that's good.  As of today I've lost about 28lbs since May 8th so not bad. I'm pretty happy with my results. I'm just waiting for my energy to come back so I can start back at the gym. I did try the eliptical last Monday, 5 days ago. I probably looked ridiculous because I was just cruising gently just to get everything moving but that's ok.I want to take it easy because I stll have a little soreness around my drain incision. I think by this Monday I'll be good to start back in as usual.  I started back at work this week and that's good too. I have a desk job and it's only about 6 hours a day max. This week's been light so only about 4 so it's been a blessing. Looking forward to the benefits my surgery will bring me.

Happy Memorial Day!

Well I'm 5 days post op. My husband and I drove 3 hours to Bakersfield Ca to San Joaquin Community Hospital where I had my surgery. San Joaquin is a beautiful hospital with a look of a nice hotel. The lobby has marble floors beautiful decor and big comfy chairs.We stayed the night in a comfy hotel though I didn't get much sleep.

My arrival time was 5:30 though I was up showered and ready to go by 4:45. I made sure to shave my legs and arms because only God knows when I'll be able to do that again. Fortunately not too long. After arriving at the hospital Greg, our greeter dressed like a bell man took us to the pre surgery room. When I got there I was a bit nervous but mostly excited. My nurse's name was Greta and she was wonderful. So sweet and kind and took her time. I was given my lovely gown, socks and cap and changed then answered a battery of questions to Greta. I requested a lidocaine shot before my IV because I've had bad experiences and she was very agreeable. I met all the surgical party before kissing my hubs a quick good bye and wheeled up to surgery. The room was brightly lit and cold but had some funky jazz playing while my anesthesiologist Shawn and my head surgery nurse Tara got me ready. By then it was 740. I scooched over onto the table and Shawn gave me the "oxygen" mask. He asked me to breath deeply. I joke and said some good oxygen is just the thing I needed. I took 2 deep breaths and was out. When I awoke Great was talking to me and I couldn't believe it was over. It was 3 hours later. I had a scar on my stomach from a car accident when I was a child that had caused some scar tissue inside  and a couple of hernias that the Dr had to clean up before he could precede.

I was wheeled up to my room answered a few questions then my folks sister and hubby were let in. I wanted to walk immediately because I'd heard the sooner you get moving the better but my body was still under the influence so I waited a few hours. I felt so weak. It was unbelievable. The pain wasn't too bad but I was using the morphine pump they gave me every 20 minutes. I was able to use the restroom right away and that helped a lot. That night I didn't sleep too well because it hurts to roll over and I'm a side sleeper and the hospital beds are horrible! 

The day after surgery was probably the worst day for me. That was when I was the most sore but I kept up with my walking and breathing exercises with the coaching of my sweet hubby. I tried not to stay in bed more than 2 hours at a time during the day and I think that helped. I would switch to a chair or go to the bathroom then walk but just got up so I wouldn't stiffen up.  I had to have my IV changed that day because it blew a vein. Unfortunately my nurse could not give me lidocaine because it had to be approved by my Dr and they couldn't reach him. I ended up having the IV put in after a small anxiety episode. It wasn't too bad and I was kinda proud of myself.

 On Friday I got a shot in my belly of an anti clotting medication. I was warned it would burn but felt nothing.  I got my first shower, which was delicious. Got to shave my legs and lube up with moisturizer and I felt human again.I was feeling pretty good so went off the morphine pump around 6pm. I was feeling mild pain but not too much that I couldn't distract myself from it and I was nervous about getting home and only having vicodin. I stayed an extra day in the hospital because of the distance from home and hubby got to stay with my because all the hotels were sold out for Friday night So he got a taste of what nights in the hospital are like. 

Saturday morning came and I got another shot of anti clotting med again no pain involved, must be all the fat on my belly. I washed up, packed up and waited to sign my discharge papers. By noon I was rolled out of my room. All of my nurses that were on duty wished me well and waived us off. I was rolled down to the entry where our truck was brought up from the valet. Yes San Juaquin Community Hospital has free valet parking.

That afternoon I unpacked had some broth and took a nap. Later we went to my folks for a spaghetti feed with my family. I had some Good Earth tea while everyone loaded up on food. It’s getting easier t watch everyone eat while I sip but I can’t wait to chew food.

Sunday, fourth day post op, I woke up and felt pretty good. Had another cup of Good Earth and ½ a bottle of Smart Water by noon. Did a couple of loads of laundry, unloaded the dishwasher and showered. Then had  a cup of Vegetable and Chicken broth by Swanson. It’s not my favorite but it’s all I had in the house. I prefer Trader Joes broths. Their low carb, low sodium and taste great. That evening my hubby took me to the grocery store. Got caught up for the week since I won’t be driving anywhere even though I’m not taking any pain meds.

Monday, Happy Memorial Day!  Today I get to start my Full Liquids! Yay! Made blueberry buckwheat pancakes for the family and cream of wheat with a bit of oatmeal for me. I even made sure to make it run off the spoon. I added some vanilla and a couple of tsp’s of  SF Torani English Toffee for flavor. It was fabulous. We went to the movies and after stopped at Baja Fresh for some dinner. They have a fabulous Chicken Tortilla Soup. If you ask they’ll strain the meat and vegies out. It’s still pretty hearty but I just spit it in a napkin. That’s a trick I learned while on the liquid diet. If I was jonesing to chew some food I would take a bite of what I wanted, chew it up slowly, savour the flavor then spit it out in the garbage. No harm done. My soup had a few chunks of chicken in it and I thought I’d do the same but my hubby distracted me and I accidentally swallowed it. For a moment I panicked inside but I settled myself took a couple of sips of water and waited. Nothing happened. It passed through.

 It’s 4 hours later and still no problem so I think I’m good hopefully. One thing is I’m really diligent about taking my vitamins, getting at least 40 oz of water in a day and making sure I get my protein. It seems to be working. I also keep a food and water log which helps.

I’m excited about the new me that is emerging. She’s stronger and more disciplined and I can’t wait to see her finally emerge in full looking back at me in the mirror.

I'm on my 11th day of the liquid diet and 4 days from my surgery. The hunger pains subsided around the 4th day and now Im rarely hungry. I'm having a little anxiety about the surgery but I think that's normal. I think I'm having more about the surgeon's bill. My insurance changed mid way through my procedure and went from having my surgeon in network and costing me $250 out of pocket  to not being a covered procedure. Fortunately the insurance is being gracious enuogh to cover the surgeon at out of pocket. So my share will be around $4500. We had to decide that my health was worth more than a dollar amount and suck it up. Now that we're over that I'm taking care of last minute details so my kids and hubs will be taken care of while I'm in the hospital and post surgery. Now off to bed