ravenwing229

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I have my surgery date, May 21st, a little longer than I thought it was going to take to reschedule, but I am sure it will fly by.  Thanks to all of you who have supported me.

So I found out that my surgery has been canceled because my surgeon is having his hand operated on...no advanced warning it hit me like a ton of bricks. I am trying to stay positive but I was so excited and mentally prepared for the 4th, now I have no idea when I will be rescheduled.....this stinks

My date has been moved up!  
I am scheduled for April 4th!!!  
I am so excited!

Finally, I got the call from my insurance company, my surgery has been approved!  I have a tentative surgery date of April 16th....still haven't heard from my surgeon, so I don't know if I should count my chickens or not, but at least the insurance went through YEE-HA!

I am feeling so blue the last couple of days...I guess I am just so disgusted with myself because I haven't lost ANYTHING.  I need to get a grip.  I am really hurt because one of the kids in my daughter's class saw her looking at a book about Noah's Ark and said that he could find her mom on there no problem and pointed out the elephant.  After all these years of verbal abuse it still hurts and makes me feel like less of a person.  I felt so bad because my daughter started to cry and the school counselor called me in to find out what had happened. How humiliating to have to explain. 

Well, I passed the psych eval, now it has to be dictated and sent over to my surgeons office, then the insurance paperwork can finally be sumbitted, after that I was told by the NP at the surgeons office that it will be about 3 months until surgery!!! :-(  I am so bummed I thought for sure that I would have it done by my birthday (feb.29th).  Oh well, at least I know that it is going to happen, because she also told me that she has never had any trouble with my insurance denying anyone.  I was so mad at my self I had gained 5 lbs since my last appointment ( before Thanksgiving).  I am determined to have lost the next time I go.  I just have to get serious because I know that this is eventually going to happen. 

I am so nervous about my up coming appointments on Friday, my final psych. eval and an appointment at my surgeons office, I am freaking out because I don't know if I have actually lost any weight since I was there, and the holidays sure didn't help.   It sucks because I have no way to weigh myself to keep track of my weight, even my doctor's (PCP) office doesn't have a scale that can give me any accuracy, it only goes to 350.  Oh well, I don't know what I will do if I haven't lost, it will be a horrible thing.

Well, I got the results from my sleep study, I have 43 episodes an hour and my oxygen level drops to 83%(they like it to be over 90), so I return for the dreaded over night on January 23rd to get fitted for my "gas mask", those things look so strange!!!  Hopefully I will feel like a new person when I am actually getting some rest, not fighting to breathe all night!!!  Anyway, one more thing out of the way before surgery.....Hope everyone enjoyed their holiday...Happy New Year!!!

Went for my sleep apnea test on the 5th, could not fall asleep, finally at about 2 a.m. I fell asleep, I go back for my results on the 18th, the lady that conducted the test told me that more than likely I will put on a CPAP, I didn't stop breathing while I was there, but my breathing became very shallow which is not good.  Anyway, one more thing out of the way.  Tomorrow I go in for an appointment at the Surgical Center and my final appoint for the psychological evaluation, hopefully all is good there.  I don't have scales at home so I never know until I get there if I have lost or not, last time I had gained 2 lbs :(  I feel like I have lost this time, I sure hope so. 

Well, here it is almost 1:30 a.m. and I am so anxious that I can't sleep!  I go in today for the 2nd part of my psych eval (my insurance requires 3 visits) and I just toss and turn.  I guess that I just don't want anything to prevent me from being approved.  I guess I will try to read and maybe that will help.  I know that all I due today is fill out some sort of questionare, just worried about the unknown....