RedHeadLookingToLive

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

I had my lab work read and discussed with me yesterday with my surgeon. For the most part my lab work was normal. The Vit B issue wasn't an issue at all, so I'm good there. My calcium was off, slightly on the low side, so she's increased my calcium intake, putting me on 2000 mg. a day instead of 1500.

I talked again with her today via the phone. The tingling sensation she wants to see disappear with the increased calcium. If in two weeks the sensations don't disappear or become better (increasingly better) then I am to have a test for MS (multiple sclerosis).

I've discussed this with some folks that were online yesterday and I thank them from the bottom of my heart for their kind words and their ability to keep me grounded.

I'll remain optimistic and I will take my vitamins and in two weeks, hopefully I will no longer have the tingling and pain issue I have when my skin is touched. If I do then I will make an appt. with my family doctor, who will either order an MRI or send me to an neurologist.

One year out. . . and what a year it’s been. I’ve struggled with my marriage; I’ve gone back into the work force; I had an ovary/fallopian tube/cyst removed as a routine surgery then ended up having three more and almost dying because of it; I also.... lost 164 lbs!

What a difference a year makes. I can say that and truly understand what it means. A year ago today I was being prepared for a surgery that I had spent years researching, hours praying over, months discussing it with folks, weeks of getting tests and paperwork done. When I lay on that operating table, waiting for them to do their thing, I thought for a brief moment of getting up and walking out. A fear overtook me, then I closed my eyes and told myself. . .I had to do this. These people knew what they were doing. It was my turn to trust them and if things went wrong, I wouldn’t know it. (Funny... how that one statement eased my subconscious.) I woke up a hour and a half later and it was done. . . My new life began.

Now . . . I can fit in chairs that had always intimidated me. I just sit down and there is room between my body and the arm rests. I fit in an airline seat! I was always worried I wouldn’t. :o I slide into restaurant booths, never worrying if the table is bolted down to the floor. I walk nature trails and can breathe easily. The steering wheel on my car is in its lowest position and it doesn’t rub my belly!! Stairs, no problem. Sex... well, we are able to do different positions, because the belly is no longer in the way!!!

My clothes are more stylish. My lingerie... hell I didn’t have any before, now I do. I wore a 26/28 and I’m now wearing a size 16. I was a 52DD, now a 44DD. I bought size 14 panties, now I buy size 7 or 8 depending on the style. I now own THONGS and I have matching sexy underthings.

There are so many positives. . .I can honestly say the negatives (if there are any) don’t mean much to me. What negatives are there, you may ask? Well... is it negative to miss munching randomly? Perhaps, but eh... it’s worth it.

It's almost one year for me. I'm loving it! I'm down from 403 to 239! Amazing, huh?! I've not had too many issues with my weight loss, side effects and such. Most recently I'm dealing with what we believe is a vit. b defiency. I've got labs scheduled for Monday or Tuesday, depending on when I get home from my mini-vacation this week. A new photo is up in my photo album. Feel free to peruse it. I know I'm still staring at it. Look how much door there is behind me!!

Have a brilliant and beautiful day!!

First nothing too major, just some interesting things. . .

I took a job, (okay that's major). lol. I'm working in retail now. I'm a Fashion Bug Associate. *big grin* I get a 40% discount on regular priced items and a 20% discount on clearance stuff. w00t! for me!! lol.

Okay, so the other stuff. . . I was taking care of a customer and a girl walked up to the counter and asked for a job application. I glanced over at her and smiled, greeted her and asked how she was doing. It was very obvious I knew her but it was equally obvious that she didn't know me. Well. . . she did but she hadn't seen me since Christmas last year. I said... "You're trying to figure out who I am aren't you?" She admitted she was and so I let her off the hook with "You're married to my cousin." Her jaw dropped and she gasped. She exclaimed that she hadn't recognized me. *GRINS* She's the first person that hasn't recognized me since the weight loss. Granted we don't see each other often and maybe that was why she didn't make the connection, but hey I can dream right? lol

Another thing. . .I had to go to the school today and drop off some meds for my son. (He's allergic to the Zebra mosquitoes and had to have some cream for a bite he received.) I get there and you can see the look on the faces of these teachers and employees as I walk into the school with my son. I am dressed decent, so I know that aren't staring at a woman in curlers or a worn night gown. lol... They are looking at me, the smaller me. The secretary comments again about how great I'm looking. (She complimented me a month ago when I registered my son for third grade.) I smiled and thanked her, talked a little about my experience a few months ago with the infection from the surgery in May (Unrelated to the GBS one). I then left with a big smile on my face and my heart.

I've shown my before and after pictures to a few ladies at work and they are just amazed. I showed it to my mom and she kept it. lol... So now I have to print out another set. I'm still amazed at the success I have experienced with this surgery. My weight loss is slowing, but that's okay. If I never lost another pound I'd still be happy and grateful that I was able to do this and I have the support of family and friends.

I'm still struggling with taking vitamins on a daily basis. Why is it that a person doesn't do what they know they are supposed to do? *sigh* i've never liked taking pills; but I've always done it when I was told to (you know when you're sick and you get a prescription...) So why not the vitamins?

Wow, I've been a busy bee. I decided to go back to work! There are many reasons behind this decision. I'm working at a local women's clothing store, when I say local, I mean about 40 min. from me. lol. . .

I'm loving it! I get a chance to interact with other adults! I'm currently hired in as a part-time employee, but I've been working full-time hours, and I'm 99.9% positive I'll be moved to full-time after I put in 30 days with the company. I love the discount too... 40% off regular priced items and 20% off clearance!

The kids are back in school and the spouse is still working hard to provide for all our needs.

My health is great, though I do wish I could say the same about my personal life. The spouse and I are having issues. I don't know what our future holds, but I do know I want my kids to be okay. No matter what happens between their dad and I.

Keep us in your thoughts and prayers if you don't mind. *hugs*

My day. . .

I must tell you about my afternoon today. My morning sucked, so let's just skip that and move on to this afternoon. My mail came and there was a pamphlet in my LAKES magazine. This pamphlet talked about a new Nature Preserve a small drive away from us. I thought it would be good to go to it, so suggested it to the spouse, who agreed.

I wasn't sure what we'd do when we got there. lol.... I knew there was a waterfall but I didn't know what type of trails there would be. The pamphlet wasn't real detailed. So anywhoooo we still went.

We got to the preserve, parked the car and began to walk our trail. As we walked I thought back to when my family last went walking on a nature trail. . .

It was just before my surgery and I weighed over 400lbs. I walked the entire trail with them at that time, though it hurt and I couldn't breathe and we had to stop and let me rest at every bench along the way. I walked down the (I don't know how many) steps to view the waterfall and I walked back up them, stopping every 10 to rest and catch my breath. On the way back to our van during that trip... each bench was a goal to me, because it meant I could sit and rest. My family waited with me. The girls getting to the benches first and cheering me on.

Today's walk. . .

I began my walk without really thinking much of it, except enjoying the beauty of this new preserve. As we walked though I thought back and I chuckled. . .This was so much harder when I was over 400 lbs. Then as we walked further, I realized I could breathe. I could talk and walk. I could stay caught up with everyone. I even was faster than my second daughter, though she does have a cold and was on drowsy inducing medicines. But, I was still faster than a sick 12 year old! . . . I walked up and down the hills, one was quite steep. I walked all the way to the end of the trail and then back to where it split to another. We then took the other trail and walked it too! I broke a sweat, but you know what, the only time I had to stop was to get a rock out of my shoe. There were two benches on the trail. I never needed to use them. I got back to the van and I wasn't out of breath at all. If it hadn't been for the trails being over, (they have several more in the works) . . . I could have walked more!

Eight months... that can't be right. October 24, 2006 - July 6, 2007 *thinks to self* Yep, eight months and a couple weeks even. My it's been a while since I've updated.

Well, let me start out with my total weight loss... I'm down 143 lbs.

I wear a size 20 jeans, 16 skirt, 16 to 18 blouse, depending on the cut and style. 1X T-shirts. My rings need resized too. Size 9 panties and 44DD bras.

Old sizes... 26/28 knit slacks (I didn't even own jeans . Now I own three pair!  26/28 shirts and dresses (sometimes even bigger ones).  I wore size 14 panties and 52DD bras.

I can now fit into nylons, where before I stopped wearing them because of my size was too hard to fit. It's been an amazing 8 mths. Mind boggling really. I can't believe how much I've lost and how my life has changed.

It hasn't been all fun and games either. Most recently I lost 7.2 lbs because of a surgery I had to have. I'll explain...

On May 2th I went to the hospital to have a routine surgery to remove my left ovary and fallopian tube. The doctor, my ob-gyn, performed the operation and removed a lot of excess scar tissue. I was released that following Friday.

On Sunday night I went to bed to nap. I suddenly began shivering violently. I couldn't get warm, no matter how hard I tried. I lay there in bed, teeth chattering for three hours, hubby ran out and bought a thermometer, we couldn't find ours. I got up and used the bathroom, when he returned. As soon as I peed I smelled this foul odor. I thought it was my incision's fluids draining. I knew I had an infection.

I went back to bed and took my temperature. 102.9 degree! My husband drove me to the hospital and my parents met me there. At the hospital I saw the Ob/Gyn on call (my doctor was off till Tuesday). The Ob/Gyn there ordered an MRI to determine if there was a fluid collection under my skin. He noticed a red swelling mark on my stomach that I and my spouse hadn't seen when I started my nap. So in 3 hours time this spot not only showed up but had grown to two inches in diameter.

The MRI didn't show a fluid build up so the doctor admitted me with an order for the wound care team to take a look at me the next day. That order was later canceled and an order for a plastic surgeon was given, because it was determined they were going to reopen me to clean the infection. They waited though, until Tuesday when my Ob/Gyn was back on her shift.

Two days passed and it is now Tuesday morning. My doctor comes in and the red mark is now about 6 inches in diameter, red, and very hot and swollen. She immediately said we'd be opening it up and she wanted a plastic surgeon to be with her. I was wondering ... umm  why. She said she thought there was a chance there'd be some internal damage a specialist would need to fix.

They got around to operating on me and reopening the incision at about 8pm that night! When I was able to comprehend what had happened in the operating room, I was surprised. I knew I had an infection, I just didn't know how serious it was.

I had a flesh eating bacteria. That is how my Ob doctor described it to my family as I was in recovery. The bacteria had eaten away the entire bottom layer of skin in my abdomen. It had started to eat at the muscles too. The plastic surgeon that had come with my doctor said it was one of the worse cases he'd seen.

I was transferred two days later to another hospital, this one was the one the plastic surgeon preferred to do his work out of.  I was washed up, the incision, I should mention had never been closed after this reopening surgery. It was now called an open wound. The hospital staff washed me, three people did the job as I lay on a metal table. After that I was given a private room.

The following day I was back in surgery and under the knife again. My doctor put in manufactured/donated skin in my abdomen and repaired some of the abdominal muscles that had been eaten away. I figure he "shaved" or "cut" them so they were smoother and would heal eventually. When that surgery was over I spent another week in the hospital.

I got to come home, but again with an open wound that was packed for three weeks with a saline soaked pair of gauzes. The wound, if you need a general idea of the size... well it would have fit if not two at least one in a half softballs in it. My spouse and my mom packed the wound from 2-3 times a day until the day I went back in to have it removed.

That day I went in and was retold they would be removing the entire apron of my belly. I was getting the entire chunk cut off. Hip to hip. See, the doctor talked about this whenever I saw him, but I never really comprehended it until the time drew closer. I'll tell you I was freaked. This apron had been a part of my life for so long... how would I look? How would I feel? I just didn't know.

I woke up from surgery and felt bandages on my now flat abdomen.  I was  in awe of  this. I could feel my  "sex" without lifting my tummy!  When was the last time I did that. . .I can't remember.  They removed 7.2lbs of  excess skin, fat, damaged tissue.

Now it's been a month since the "tummy tuck" - which is covered by insurance because of the wound itself was a problem from a surgery. I don't like how my body looks. I feel like Jaws took a bite of me. I still have the full round hips, but the doctor says as I lose weight they will flow into the now smaller tummy. I sure hope he is right, because I really don't like how this looks. *blushes* It is better than the gross apron I had to lift to wash or wipe my own intimate region!

I'm healthy again. I am free of staples and drain plugs and ready to continue swimming a little further ahead every day. My new motto: Just keep swimming. I'll be switching photos to resemble that motto as soon as I can.

Yeppers, I'm annoyed. I can't find the usb cord to download images from my camera to the computer. *sigh* I have a four month shot on there and I need to get a five month shot on there. I could use my daughter's camera, but need 4 AAA batteries to get it working. *double grrrr*

I am down to 308lbs, just 5 more from having lost 100 lbs, since the surgery. I feel so different, it is unlike anything I could imagine.

Clothing from a 26/28 to a 16/18 right now and even then I could go one size smaller. *grins*

I was laying in bed this morning, (naked, because that is how I sleep) and my hands were wandering (we don't need to discuss where they were wandering too, but they were wandering here and there and everywhere. . .). But as they wandered I felt my pelvis bone! Now, that may not seem like a big deal, but this distraction was enough to gain my attention from other things that had been pressing just moments before.

So I continued laying there, (being flat on the bed helps one find the new changes of their body) my other hand left its earlier resting spot and searched out the matching pelvis bone. Now, here is where the "Holy crap!" title comes into play. As I pushed against those bones I thought to myself, "If I lose all this weight my hips would be about so wide (this is where I lifted both my hands up and stared in wonder at the space between my hands and adding some for the hip bones themselves).

My husband then checked that same width with his hands, which led to searching out my ribs, which led to a morning tickle (you thought I was going to say sex, didn't you?!) (( No sex, he had to get ready for work)).

But back on subject. . .

I was shocked, astonished and giddy. But. . .also a tad fearful. I thought what if I lose all this and ???? <<<< what? I don't know. I couldn't finish the thought, so unexpected was the thought of my size getting that small. Now I sit here and I know what was wrong. I was panicking. I realized I was losing the security blanket I have carried with me all my life and I was going to be exposed. There will no longer be this big, cushy body that has been through everything in my life. It has been my excuse for eating. My excuse for inactivity and my excuse for being sad.

Okay, I'm almost 3 mths post op. (Jan. 24th) and its time to update my list of accomplishments, or at least add to them or remind myself about them.

1. Just sitting here and breathing easier.
2. My rings slip off easier.
3. Steering wheel can be lowered to the lowest position and doesn't hit my tummy. (There is a lot of room!)
4. Smaller panties.
5. Smaller slacks.
6. Smaller bra - FINALLY!
7. Slides into booths.
8. Fits in Salon's waiting room chairs - (damn tiny things they are too. . . )
9. Walks up the steps easier.
10. Walks easier - without losing my breath.
11. No longer feels so self-conscious about myself.
12. JEANS!!!!!!!
13. Sex is . . . Wow!
14. Body has gotten smaller and it is noticable.
15. I have cheekbones.
16. My neck is thinner.
17. I have added over 10 years back onto my life.
18. Off blood pressure medication!!!
19. More energy.
20. My kids are proud of me and I don't feel like I am an embarrassment to them, even though they never thought that. . .I know it was all in me.