scholarmama
2004
3-2004
Mother of 4, been heavy all of my life. Worried that I wont be around for my children. Tried every diet and cant seem to get them to work for me long term. Seriously wanting surgery, I have been researching for about a year and a half and I have come to the conclusion that without this tool... I am going to die. I have severe sleep apnea, my knees and back are in horrible shape... and to be honest... at this point in my life I dont even know what I weigh. I am a single mom trying to better my life for my children's sake and this is the best way physically to get that accomplished. I am about to finish my degree in psychology, and moving on to my teaching credential. I want to better myself in all areas... just hoping to find a PCP and surgeon who see it my way.
04/27/2004
Finally found a PCP that agrees with me that I am a perfect candidate for gastric by pass. She believes with the other medical situations that I have we will be able to push this thru the insurance. Keeping fingers crossed. I got a consult date rather quickly I am surprised... From the postings I have seen it can take awhile... things seem to be moving right along Praise God!!!!
05/06/2004
Found a wonderful doctor and we are starting the testing process, he is hopeful to get the surgery done before the summer ends, which I hope because I go back to school for one more class before my final semester as an undergrad.
5/13/2004
Playing phone tag with the referral lady, thanks to the California support board I am marching into the office and getting my referals and making the appt myself.
5/14/2004
I cant believe it worked...lol. I got all my referrals and I have made appointments for monday. I am having trouble with the Upper GI, the tables arent sturdy enough for my weight... gonna push the insurance to find a place and find it with an appointment that is soon.
5/31/2004
I have everything scheduled to be completed by June 7th but the psych eval. Not sure whats going on with that. I will be calling the referral lady again tomorrow being that today is a holiday. I have finally sat down with my older kids and explained to them what was going on... why all the doctor's apptments and things...and they are excited. Especially when I told them it meant more time with playing instead of watching.
6/16/2004
I have everything completed... I did as of June 9th, psych eval took all of 15 minutes (NO KIDDING) I am now waiting for doc to get back from vacation this week to look over the preop tests and approve me for surgery then I will have my date. Looks like everything is falling into place. I am happy to be able to have the summer to recouperate. I have already, changed my eating habits, We have cut out all soda and almost all carbs. Even started eating only a protein shake for breakfast and only drinking what is allowed after the surgery... I actually like the sugar free crystal light, even thought I bought the wrong one at first because it tasted sweet. I am getting anxious about the up coming surgery and excited to start my new life.
7/1/2004
10:46 am... received a call from my case manager from IEHP and she was excited to tell me we got the approval... My doctor should have the hard copy this afternoon and I should have a scheduled surgery date no later than friday afternoon at the latest. It has been basically 2 months since I started pursuing this adventure and I am soooo ready for this next step. I was told to start my vitamins today and make sure I am drinking enough water. I am also gonna kick up the exercise a notch... We have been swimming almost daily, but I hear that I cant swim till the incissions are healed, here is crossing fingers I get healed quickly. Thankfully I have this site and the friends I have made here, for without there support I dont know where I would be.
7/02/2004
Well its offical... I have a date!!! July 28th. Mo @ Dr. Suh's office is wonderful. She went over everything that I needed to know for the surgery and days prior as to things I needed to get done. I am so excited. I am hoping that between now and then I can sleep because I am extremely anxious... not nervous but anxious to start my new life as a loser!!! I have got most of the shopping list that the Dr. suggests for before the surgery. I will get the rest later this month as well as preparing the kids for the time that mom will be away... I am gonna start praying for them and an understanding from them... I dont want them to see my the first day I will call them from the hospital to say good nite... and see them the next day. I just think the tubes and things might frighten them...Well I will post again closer to the date and again as soon as I can after surgery.
7-22-2004
Well the day I was dreading most has come and the hard part gone and the agonizing countdown begins...
What was I dreading... Well when I went in for my consult... the only thing the doc said was to be down something... but definitely not up... so I have been sweating it since I have known I was going back to see him today. I have been working out daily eating mostly proteins... and hardly any carbs. And still I was really really worried... cuz on the 12th I was at my last mandatory support groups and I was up... well not only did I lose what i was up I lost 4 more lbs besides that for a total 7.5 lbs before surgery... wooo hooo
I have done my pre registration at the hospital and confirmed my breathing abilities with the cardiopulminologist today... got the last of my blood work done. Now it is the hurry up and wait game... Sunday I have to start soft foods... no more meats then the nite before nothing but liquids and the infamous poop soda and I have to wait till 5 to drink mine... I didnt really want to be up all nite...lol but thats the way it goes...(no pun intended...lol)...
heres to seeing the other side
This is probably by far the most important decision I have made for myself. This is the first time in my life that I have put me first and made decisions based upon what is good for me...this alone is a big step let alone the surgery itself. I hope this weekend goes quickly otherwise I might drive my family completely nuts.
7-28-2004
Today is the day I cant believe it is finally here. I know I have been blessed because this process has taken such little time but on the otherside I feel like it has taken forever. Most people I have seen are really nervous about now... and here I sit just hours before check in and I feel nothing... It's almost as if it is suppose to happen like a normal everyday occurence..(yeah right). But for the first time I have made a decision that, yes it will effect my family, but it is a benefit for me as well as for them. My life will forever be changed and I am ready to stand and become a loser. I know that whatever happens from today forward, God had it planned long before it occurred, so I am at peace and thankful for the opportunity to change my life. And no matter what happens I would have still made the same choice to have the surgery, cause any opportunity to make life better is always the right choice.
8-5-2004
Today I had my one week check up and I cant believe it... I am down 26 lbs from my initial weigh in when I had my consult with my surgeon. (22.5 in the week) I feel great!!! I finally have enough energy to stay awake the whole day without having a nap. But too I am sleeping more sound than ever, because while at the hospital they found that my sleep apnea was far more severe than thought. So I am sleeping with oxygen at nite and on naps, but I am confident that that will go away soon enough. I have pretty feet and ankles again. Ronnie says he was able to hug me better... but I just dont see the loss yet other than in my feet... but thats ok... I do have one outfit that fits better than before so it must be coming off...lol. Next weigh in is in 3 weeks... i am hoping to be close to 50 lbs so we'll see... I get to start eating today... I am gonna mostly stick to fish and cheese... cuz I am not a big cottage cheese eater and I cant seem to find a low sugar yogurt but thats ok... I love tuna and I will survive... the doc was pretty pleased with me too... and the fear of having the staples out was for nothing cuz it was a complete breeze. I am so excited about my new life... the world is mine once more!
08/29/2004
It has been one month since my new life began and oh what a difference a month makes. I have lost 40.5 lbs and I feel great. I walk a mile plus everyday and enjoy swimming about an hour as well, but that will probably be stopping once school starts on the 7th of Sept. Everyone I see says they can see a difference but I cant yet however, little things tell me that I am. Like a towel finally wrapping all the way around me, sitting behind the steering wheel without needing it tilted and most of all I am wearing smaller clothes and the other clothes are falling off of me. I had a trying month... lack of energy, needing to sleep, trouble with apnea and eating. I have absolutely no desire to eat, I have to make myself take time away from drinking and eat. I am happy to be on normal foods 3 weeks of fish was hard and tiring I was soooo sick of fish that my first meal was shrimp! yum yum and it didnt bother my pouch. Since then I have had turkey meat, and pork meat and the only thing I have to remember is eat SLOWLY otherwise I will get full and hurt. I have gotten in plenty of protein daily above 60 grams each day and I am happy with myself to accomplish that. With all the eating I am lacking a bit in my water so trying to watch and count that more. I now have more energy and am not dragging by the end of the day. I am looking forward to continue success and I cant wait to see the difference. I am taking a picture every month so that I keep a journal of my journey as well as see the difference myself.
I have taken advice from the support group such as using a saucer to make the brain see full. I use a propel bottle to sip from so that I dont gulp cuz boy does that hurt. I am sooo thankful for the new life I have been given... I will NEVER be fat again.
9-14-04
I am 7 wks out from surgery tomorrow, I had my support group meeting last nite (where we can weigh in) and I got on the scales expecting only about a 50 lbs loss and low and behold I was 59lbs down in 6 1/2 weeks. I cried... I was so excited I cried! Everyone there cheered and clapped and was happy for me, I even had one big guy give me a bear hug and lift me off the ground... I dont think I have ever been lifted off the ground by a male in a very very long time (I mean were talking since my daddy carried me...lol) I am down 3 sizes from a 32 to a 26 I can ALMOST fit into a 24 and a 2X ... I cant remember when the last time I fit into a 2X was...My current BMI puts me not in the super obese anymore but in the morbidly obese... (kinda funny to cheer about that huh) I am walking 2 miles a day and loving it... this morning if it were for time restraints I probably would have gone for 3 I was feeling sooooo good. On top of walking in the morning I am walking ALL over campus and taking the stairs now which never would have been a possibility before. School is doing well ... I am able to reuse a paper from last semester and there is not really any BIG projects that I have to do and I say that tentatively cuz I still have one more class to go to tonite. I am truly thankful for the new life that I have been given and cannot wait to do more. Till next weigh in.
10-22-04
I figured it was time to post a new picture... especially since I am down 76 lbs now in 12 weeks... I am completely amazed at what I can do and how many people have noticed... I cant wait for 12 more lbs cuz then I will finally be under the 300 lbs and then I will be 12 shy of 100 lbs gone... I didnt think it would come this fast... I am working out 3-6 times a week... I always take sundays off... I walk all over campus and now I am not falling asleep in class... lol. I am wearing 2Xs where I was wearing 4X and I am in a 22-26 pant depending on the cut.. and I was in 32s... the little things are the things that I am most excited about ... wearing an anklet for the first time, able to shop without having back spasms, fitting in the desks at school, being able to take the stairs instead of the elevator to name a few... School is going well and I will be a and on to my masters in the spring... I cant till I walk in May cuz I will be looking gooooood by then...lol
10-28-2004
Well yall it has been 3 months today... I had my 3 month appointment and my weight loss is 84 lbs ... 16lbs from being 100 down. The doctor was very happy about my success and said to keep up the good work. I can not believe how good I feel and how much I am able to do. I work out 5-6 times a week, I am constantly on the go, I have energy like never before, and my sleep apnea is gone "poof" I am now wearing 22-26 depending on the cut... 2X shirts but even those are now loose... I am able to wear jewelery that I havent been able to wear... I am just extactic...I am 7 weeks from the completion of my degree and am already in count down mode... (and other than a really bad prof things are going well there too) I made it through my first birthday party, (my daughter turned 4 last Saturday) we did lunch and cake and ice cream.. and I didnt want any of it...lol. I can smell sugar in everything now... and the smell makes me nauseated...(never thought i'd say that) I dont believe I will have a prob with holidays but I am looking forward to a few days off from everything. Thank you to my obesity help family... without you I wouldnt be this far.
11-22-04
I just want to scream and shout and tell the whole world...This news couldnt have come at a better time since we are just getting back to normal from Nathaniel being in the hospital so the news... well it has been almost 4 months and I am down 100 lbs... I dont remember the last time I was under 300 lbs. I am looking forward to Thanksgiving because its not about the food this year it is definitely about family. I am going to make a pie with splenda so that I dont feel like I am missing out on anything I figure I will take a bite of everything that I want and leave it at that. I am also excited about this 100 lbs gone because I made it right before my 30th birthday a goal that I really didnt think I would make... I really have to stop feeling like I am gonna fail at this... I will post again next month... I cant wait to see the changes that another month makes.
12-29-2004
I can hardly believe that 5 months has past since my surgery... and what changes I have seen in my life...
I am now down 121lbs... 388 down to 267... I am about 100 lbs from where I would like to be...I went from buldging out of a size 32 down to 22 and I have put on a size 18 (wooo hooo) I am wearing 2X tops where I was wearing 4X and bigger...
I went from not being able to stand for 10 minutes and I am now working out at curves 3 - 5 days a week and walking the off days with our new addition to the family... yep we added to our kaos... by getting a dog for the kids for Christmas... (what was I thinking...lol) she is good tho... 3 yrs old and already house broken... so not ever getting a pup again...lol
I graduated with my bachelors degree 2 weeks ago... wow what a semester... 18 units (6 classes) and I got 4 A's and 2 B's... I begin my teaching credential in January and should be done with that by May of 06... then on to my masters...
Although these last 5 months have brought many changes I am looking forward to the ones coming in the new year
I am getting married again next month... yep next month... we have been putting it off... and were jumping into it next month... it will be small and simple... (not that I have anything to wear but....)
This summer we will be finalizing ronnie adopting my girls....This will be one big party...plus I will be walking as a graduate in May... so BIG BIG blow out for all to come help me celebrate
I start a new job on the 3rd... Where???? at CURVES!!! I get to workout and get paid for it...lol. The managers were impressed with my attitude and skills... but mostly they kept saying that I would be an inspiration to the other women...
As I reflect over the last year... I am sooo thankful for all of you my OH family and friends... checking on me when I couldnt be here as often as I would like... being there for Ronnie when I went through the surgery... most importantly cheering me on as I go...I just want you all to know how blessed i consider myself to call you my friends...
2005
01-31-2005
Hey all... I cant believe that it has been 6 months and what a fantastic ride it has been. I cannot believe all that I can do now and all that I was not doing with all that weight on. Well I set out to be at 250 lbs by my sixth month ckup and I didnt think I was gonna make it... I'd be really close but not there... Well I stepped on the scale at the doctors office and it went to 247 slowed... 249 and paused... then 250... I jumped up and down shouted for joy, did the jig and never felt so excited... well maybe once but...lol
So here is a little run down on the last 6 months...
I am down 138 lbs in 6 months I started this journey busting out of 4X's and 32's and now I am sitting here wearing a L and 16-18 pants. My shoes have gone from 11W to 10 regular... I have about another 90 to go although some of that will be removed with reconstructive surgery. I wear an anklet everyday I workout at curves 4 days a week and walk our dog Rosie the other days. I no longer have sleep apnea wooohooo... and I am full of energy all the time. I ride bikes with my kids (something I havent done for 15 yrs) I play softball with my daughter's team... I am going on my first plane ride this summer... I am going to Magic Mountain in May... I completely have a new life THANK YOU DR SUH!!!!
04-06-2005
Well all it is that time again... lol
It has now been a little over 8 months since my surgery and I cannot tell you how happy I am to have been given such a gift as to have my life back. I honestly feel that I was existing before and now I am living...
At this point in time I am down 163 lbs from my start of 388 lbs putting me at 225 lbs. (My next goal at this time is to just get under 200... I cannot remember the last time I was under 200) I have had quite a wonderful month... I got married on the 19th and couldnt be happier. We went to Sea World and I
rode a roller coaster... something I havent done in at least 12 years... (and I wasnt worried about not fitting). As far as sizes go I started in a 32 or 4X and I am down to wearing 16 or XL tops and 18-22 on the bottom due to my belly over hang... My Easter dress was a 16 and I love the dress so now I am trying to figure out how I can alter it to get more wear out of it...lol. I did finally buy a new jacket cuz I was absolutely swimming in my other one and I couldnt believe I was able to buy it in the "normal" women's section of the store... My instinct is still very much to go into the plus sizes even tho I really dont wear those anymore...
I am down to the last few weeks of my 1st semester as a Master's student and it has been a real struggle for me... not because of class difficulty but more so staying motivated ... I went from being at school 5 days a week during the day to 2 evenings a week with each class only meeting once... It has been a really big adjustment. But one almost down and 2 more to go before student teaching... I think once I get into my actual Master's degree classes I will be more interested therefore more motivated... (yeah right...lol)
Okay well I think I have bored everyone enough now... I have attached the links to my photo albums so that you can all go browse the happenings...
http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/byemamabye/my_photos
05-08-2005
Wow where in the world has nine months gone... It honestly seems as if I was just beginning this journey. But so much has happened since then that it is hard now to imagine how I lived 9 months ago. In fact I wasnt living... I was existing... I live now... and LOVE IT!!!
I am now down 174 lbs WOW!!! 40 lbs from goal (well reconstruction goal) I am 18 lbs from being half the person I was, and just 14 lbs from being under 200 lbs and I cannot remember the last time I was under 200. I am now wearing mostly larges and XL's I absolutely drown in the 4X's I began in...lol. I put on my first pair of size 16 jeans this week and I wore my first pair of button fly jeans. That is sooo amazing to me. 16's are half of what I use to wear 32's... I just sent in my application for extreme makeover and put on my "before" outfit and fit in 1/2 of the pants... I couldnt believe it. I am starting to have mental issues with my appearance because of the skin, but try to remember all the things I couldnt do before and all the little changes. Like...
1. I use to wear an 11W in my shoe... and now I wear 9 1/2 regular
2. My ring that I wear now (a bit big already) fits inside my old rings.
3. I have to get a new toe ring cuz it falls off of me...lol
4. I played basketball with the kids at my daughters school with other mom's for mother's day event and I was the only one who walked off the court not dripping with sweat. (this I think is the most satisfying)
I could go on and on like so many of you... but i wont put you to sleep...lol.
Other things in my life have change as well, and I love the goals that I am obtaining with my new life. For instance, I walked as a graduate from California Baptist University yesterday, definitely an event I am so glad I didn't miss. I am a newly wed and well lets just say... sex has never been better...lol. I dont think exercising is such a bad thing anymore.
Well I look forward to more changes in the next few months and I will keep you posted along the way.
07-30-05
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!
I can hardly believe it but a year ago I was coming home from the hospital for the first time after having gastric by pass and what a year it has been. Flashback a year ago I was 388 lbs, wearing size 32's and 4-5x's, barely living, struggling to sleep because of sleep apnea and not able to participate in my kids' lives... jump ahead to today where I am now 183 lbs lighter at 205 lbs, wearing 15-16's, living life to the fullest, no more problems with sleep apnea, exercising on a daily basis and I am an active participant in my children's lives. I play softball with Corkie, dance with Breezy, play soccer with Libbie and wrestling with Nate.
So many things have changed for me... in this last year I graduated with my BA and am currently working on my MA in School Psychology also working on a teaching credential. I got married in a beautiful ceremony in a dress I BOUGHT OFF THE RACK... (never would have happened before... always had to have formals altered) Probably the most special thing I got to do this year was to play in the annual 5th grade t-ball game against the staff, and PTA, I would have sat on the side lines last year. I have ridden a bike, something I haven't done in 15 years, rode a roller coaster something I have done since high school. I am walking 5+ miles 3-4 days a week, and exercising with a trainer 2 days a week building some muscle mass, I do aerobics, kickbox and salsa... I race the kids, swim with them and enjoy life for the first time. I enjly shopping, because I know I can shop anywhere and buy clothes now that are CUTE TOO! I have people not recognize me and I have men checking me out...lol
No words can express the feeling I have regarding my new life. People always ask how I feel and I guess the only thing I can think of is... I am participating in life now... instead of being a bystander.
What's ahead??? Well several things lie ahead... I am about to have another surgery for a hysterectomy, hernia repair and panniculectomy. I am having the hysterectomy because my cycles are causing me to be severly anemic (which has nothing to do with the gastric surgery) While they are doing the full hysterectomy I am having a hernia repaired that up until doing tests to decipher the problems with my cycles I did not know about. But the coolest part of the surgery for me is that while doing all that I will have a panniculectomy which is the removal of my pannis (or overhang stomach) This will be an added blessing because I will fit in to clothes much better and it is estimated to remove another 10-15 lbs... HOLY COW was what I said... (I'll keep ya'll updated as to when that will happen... right now I am on a regiment of shots and pills to get my iron levels somewhat close to normal... something that they are no where near right now!) On the non-physical part for the next year... I will be completing my credential and should be a full time Math teacher then I will transfer to Azusa Pacific University (satelite school near us) to complete my MA to eventually work as a School Psychologist... I cant wait... it will only be another 18 months after completing my credential till that is done. I will be subbing in the Temecula and Murrieta School Districts and am looking forward to that ... As for the kids... Courtney is taking a season off from softball to play soccer, and Libbie is playing as well, she is so excited to play her first sport. Breanna will be auditioning for the competetive dance teams through her dance studio on August 13th... so that will be a whirlwind in itself. Nathaniel is making leaps and bounds improvements in his speeck and language development... it is so exciting to see all the changes in him... relying more on verbal skills and less on his signing. As for Ronnie... He is testing for a position with the school district while he is trying to get his business off the ground which is happening a little more every day...I just wanted to share with you the joy I have because of my life changing in such a dramatic way... If you have any questions feel free to ask... I am attaching a current photo as well as where I came from... WOW what a difference a year makes!
2006
4/3/2006
Wow its almost been a year since I last posted, I guess life has certainly caught up with me and kept me away from where I needed to be HERE!!
Well I have celebrated my one year wedding anniversary, got a teaching job, and have begun to work on the process of plastic surgery. I have been stuck at 202 lbs forever now but I have been told I have 20-30 lbs of excess skin to be removed. But I still want to break that 200 lbs mark omg... its frustrating...lol
I am wearing 14-16 s depending on the cut of the clothes. I am wearing things I NEVER thought I would ever wear. I am actually more self-conscious tho of how I look now then I ever did at 388lbs. Who da thought! I actually wore a little black dress for Christmas and I was sooooo hot...lol.
Thats a quick catch up for now. I will post again next month.
10-8-06
Wow it is hard to believe it has been 6 months since my last posting on here. What a six months those have been. I am now a contracted teacher with Hemet Unified School district teaching an elementary ED class and loving every minute of it despite the
potential injuries that I may endure. We relocated this summer and we are looking to relocate again after the holidays into our first purchased home (wooohoooo).
I am still sitting at 202 and wearing 14-16s and large- xlarge depending on the style of clothing. With my new position my insurance will cover the reconstructive surgery as long as it is medically necessary and well I think I have enough documentation of that. With the relocation I am looking for a new gym so my working out is not as consistent as I would like it however, with the students that I work with I am getting a work out on a regular basis. I am looking forward to being more active on here and being more of a support to those who are following behind me because I know what the journey has been.
I look forward to getting to know those who view my profile, because we are all here to help each other.
2007
7-30-07
I can't believe I started this journey 3 years ago. I started this journey at 388 lbs and today I am sitting at 196 -- 2 lbs away from being 1/2 the person I was. I started in a size 32 (honestly busting out of a 32) and now I consistently wear 14s. I was not doing exercise and now I do it on a regular basis. I was watching my kids play and now I play with them. It is truly hard to believe that 3 years has gone by. I still remember vividly coming home from the hospital and my 2nd oldest asking if I had the surgery cuz I wasn't skinny. Now I have my oldest telling me I cannot buy the the "same" clothes as her (I can fit in to juniors clothes -- which is what she wears)
I have lost friends as well as weight, I have lost a husband, but gained a life and for those of you just beginning hang on the journey is a wild ride. I go to amusement parks now, I love to go clothes shopping, and I love to exercise... who-da-thunk it...lol.
The only complication that I have had is anemia, but only so far as it has been exasperated not brought on by. Once we get it under control I am going to be actively persuing PS which a surgeon has told me I have at least 20-25 lbs of skin to be removed. Once that is gone I will no longer be considered obese. WOOOO HOOOOOO!!!
I have been truly blessed by this tool and have used it to my fullest advantage and have learned how to live differently. I had to come to terms with this wasn't a diet but a life style change and it is a life style that has affected my entire family.
11/25/2007
Its amazing what a few months can do. I am now 1 lb away from having lost 200 lbs. I have surpassed being 1/2 the person I was. I had a stint in the hospital because of my anemia and ended up having a blood transfusion with 4 pints of blood and had a surgical procedure to stop my menstrual cycles. I am on the road to recovery and doing well but it was touch and go there for a while. Now that we have the bleeding under control I can start really pushing PS. I cannot wait to have all this skin gone because I am tired of having to tuck in my skin into my pants :o) Its the holidays and Thanksgiving was a breeze to get through... I truly have no desire for food. I am just trying to remember to eat as this season keeps me busy not just the holidays but soccer as well. I will try to do better to post more about my journey and where I am at along the road because I know how important it was for me to see others go through the journey before me.
