shantaa

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God is good.   Its been six months since my surgery.   Im down 85lbs and I feel good.  I had my 6 month check-up and my lab work was all good.  I wasnt prepared for the emotional changes I would be going through.  I guess starting a new job with a new company a month after surgery.  Going through and ending a relationship I had for 11 year.  As well as trying to obtain my investment licence, the timing was not right........I made a complete life change all the way around.  I will continue to take each day one at a time with God's grace.

Well my first thanksgiving after the surgery was not as bad as I thought it would be.  Im on regular foods so I was able to do some turkey and I had some veggies.  My family that do not know about the surgery  was looking at my portion and than me like I was crazy.  My one uncle made jokes aboiut it latter that night, so I guess some are trying to figure out what is up.   It was very hard with the deserts, anything you can think of we had.  It was this big chocolate cake that keep calling my name, it was hard.  I was told this  a while I ago and I tried it.  I took a pinch of the cake,chewed it up and than spit it out.  Guess what it work and the cravings went away.  It fees like im eating the same thing all the time, I have to try new recipies.   Im still having a hard time with the 64oz of liquids/water.  My Dr. keep saying it will getting better, I hope so because I pray that I do not get kidney stones.

Well along with the new start with life, I start a new job next week with a new company, this offer was thrown my way while I was out on disability and it is one I could not turn down.  Im nervous and hoping that I have no incidents and that I feel ok.  I did tell the regional director everyhting and he was very supportive, so we will see.

Well tomorrow is my day.  It has been a long ride leading up to this day.   The last couple of weeks including the very hard "pre-op" has been an emotional roller coaster.   I was ok until I meet with the anestesologist (sp).  its weid, Im not afraid of the surgery but VERY afraid of  the process of putting me under.  I know it was  the Dr.'s job to prepare me for everything, well he did a good job of that.   I do not get along at all with that creature (cpap) and that is where the concerns come in at.  My fear is that I will stop breathing or choking which is due to me panicking because of the tube down my throat ect.....I just pray that the Lord will allow me to be out of it so that my brain will not take over and panick.......lol

I feel ready.  Ive prayed and my thing is "God's will be done".  My support system is a real good-everyone wants to come to the hospital-NOT.....lol   But yes, Im blessed.

I know in the beginning this will be the hardest thing Ive every done.  I do not want to do or eat anything that will cause me harm or gain the weight back..

I know one day at a time.

My surgery date has been rescheduled.  10/23/07.............Im ready.  I feel good with my decision.

Due to current things going on in my life now.  I had to make a big decision.  I postponed my surgery for 3-6 months.  The staff was very sweet and understanding.   

I will keep up with my low calorie diet and also stay active with the forums.  i think everyone for their prayers and support.

Well, I got the call I have been waiting for.  I was approved.  My surgery date is 6/26.   I am feelig  evry emotion I can right now.   I start the liquid phase next week and I more scared of this then the surgery and the life change.  I can do this!!