SuzanneRC

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Why, hello there if you are reading this .  I've decided to blog this journey of mine with the hopes that in the future I can look back and see how far I've come.  So my name is Suzanne and on Jan 28th, 2014, I had the RNY bypass performed.  What got me to that point? A life-long history of battling my weight and a serious food addiction to fix and medicate anything and everything in my life.  I've lost weight in the past multiple times (the most was 85lbs on WW) but have pretty much gained it back.  For a long time I have been dead-set against ANY bariatric surgery and yes, I suffered under the false impression that it was the 'easy' way out, pretty much like cheating.  I'm a nurse and have taken care of so many obese patients it isn't funny and have seen what happens to them acutely and over time, and believe me, it isn't pretty.  Even though I have first-hand observed all of these things, I still have been unable to put down the cake, chips, soda, etc. I have watched multiple coworkers go through bariatric surgery, some more successful than others, and over the last year I have come to see that maybe, just maybe, this might be an option for me.  My husband had been just as against surgery as I was, but last May two very skeptical people attended a weight loss surgery seminar and started to change our minds.  Having the part of your stomach removed that contains the hunger hormone ghrelin made a LOT of sense to me and when I hit bottom (unable to get up off the floor by myself after sitting down) I decided to pursue this.  So I jumped through all the hoops and barrels until receiving approval for my surgery.

Anyway, the day of surgery I was excited, nervous, afraid--pretty much the range of emotions but into the OR I went.  When I woke up the pain wasn't that bad (the surgery was laparoscopic/robotics) and I had a pain pump which I only had to press twice.  Easy-peasy.  Didn't really feel that different other than being sore and have the surgical sites to look at.  The nurse told me I might be able to go home the next day as long as I was tolerating liquids.  I decided that wasn't going to be a problem for me and when I awoke on the 29th (postop day 1)  I was chomping at the bit to go. 

Well, when I finally received my tray I took 3 ounces at 15 min intervals only to throw it up about 30 minutes later and continue to feel horrible nausea despite medications for same.  All of my optimism faded and I started to feel afraind I would never be able to keep anything down and would wind up with a permanent feeding tube. The nurse told me not to push the liquids and that my new 'pouch' was just starting to heal and was pretty swollen/inflamed from the trauma of surgery.  She was really great and encouraging about this so I gave up trying to drink for that day and got some decent sleep.

So on the 30th (postop day 2) I set out again tolerating liquids and found much to my surprise that I was getting down 3-4 ounces an hour and keeping to down.  Really wanted to go home and everyone felt I was appropriate to be discharged so hubby and I set out on the 1+ hour drive home.  I felt pretty tired but hey, I just had surgery!  Everything was great until we got home and then the nausea started to set in again, culminating in me throwing up everything again.  Again, freaking out and imagining feeding tubes.  Had to get up in the middle of the night to take more nasuea medication but not throwing up at that point. 

Postop day 3 (Jan 31st) found me very hesitant to take liquids but my nausea seemed resolved so I tried, and actually was keeping 3-4oz down every hour.  Didn't get all my fluids and protein in but was just happy that I wasn't bringing it back up.  Towards late afternoon some very scary noises started coming from my stomach/chest to the point that it sounded like a wounded animal growling in there.  I decided that was probably enough fluids and protein for the day.  Went to bed a relatively happy camper.

So today, postop day 4, found those scary growly noises coming out of me as soon as I started moving but pressed on with my protein and fluids, determined to get the minimal fluid and protein in. Well, all was going well until I felt the need to pass gass and accordingly did so.  Big mistake. Yeah. Pooped my pants .  Really? I've been chronically constipated all my life since I was a little girl and soooo did not see this coming.  So after cleaning up my own Code Brown and showering I resumed my prescribed diet.  Can I just say that getting a shower and putting clothes in the washer made me feel wiped out? I sure didn't think the fatigue would be this bad despite being warned about/told to expect it.  So I'm chugging along with everything so far but NOW I have a new problem now that I can keep liquids down.  I'M FREAKIN' HUNGRY!!!!  Looking at food porn online, everyone on TV talking about Superbowl food and I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M HUNGRY!  So is this 'head' hunger or for real?  I'm not supposed to be hungry.  So frustrated but have looked at some message boards and people are talking about 'sliders' versus more solid protein and say that once my diet advances to solids this too will resolve.  I'm so afraid it won't and I'll be hungry forever.  Boo.