virtouswoman
I came from a family of a former NBA player father and model mother.I grew up in the best neightborhood,wearing all the latest fashions,attending the best private schools and traveling all over the world.I was always taught to love,giving is better than receiving,I was never better than the next person,and to always represent the family name.I modeled,took acting and voice lessons and knew I was a star.
As time went on and my father retired from the NBA I was in middle school I did notice I was a bit more mature(physically I started maturing at 8 and was a little chunky) than my classmates but it wasnt an issue for me.Around 11 years old I was growing in areas I felt I shouldnt and everyone told me it was normal.In high school I was a brickhouse 38D-24-38 and 150 at 5'3.I never used my body to get what I wanted like most in high school I knew I was cute and had what many wished they had but as I became an upperclassman comments were made about my weight and low and behold it wasnt from peers it was from my family.When my parents would get upset they would call me everything from fat a$$ to a heifer.Over time when my siblings would get upset at me they started doing it.Also I couldnt understand why people would offer me more food when I wasnt hungry.My Fall of my senior year 1992 I got pregnant with my daughter and of course that didnt sit well but over time it was like I was carrrying my parents child.
I graduated from high school in 1993 and started college at University of Houston and received my B.S. in 1999 I did not want to be another statistc.Over time my weight went up and down and not realizing until I was an adult I was depressed for a long time and never showed it especially in public.Again the front and knowing I was living a double life just to please my family.Being told no one would want me,called out my name,and never feeling secure made me go into abusive relationships and harmful behavior to myself.From 1995-2006 my life was a rollercoaster.It had to take going back to church and looking at how my life was lead and how I should of been dead and my Lord Jesus Christ kept me when he didnt have to!I had to move back to my parents house a few times over the years and the emotional abuse was getting worse and worse and it was time to go once I left it went right back into a emotional abusive relationship ans then he started with my weight.My weight went from 150-250 over a period of a few years.Though always told I was a beautiful woman on the outside it was killing me on the inside.The last relationship was so bad around this time Hurricane Rita was heading its way towards where I was living and my daughter & I was evacuated and we were taken to a womens shelter.After the storm I chose to stay at the shelter and I lost everything.I could of went back home but didnt and when certain people knew where I was they thought I was crazy and I needed to go to family.Finally in my life I had peace and was around people who liked me for me not what I had,who I knew,and wasnt trying to use or abuse me.
Here I am 1 1/2 years later in California(Sacramento) beening blessed and no drama in my life.I said in the begining I knew I was star and I came back to a place I said at 10 years old this is where I need to be.Though at 10 I was living in LA but I chose Sac becuase with starting over I wanted a slower pace.Since I have been here I have truly been embraced and have new family.I have had a couple of setbacks but the Lord is good and always on time.This journey for me is the beginning of a new life for me though a bit nervous I know I will be alright.I ask that all my sisters and brothers here keep me in your prayers as well as you in mine and we will all beat this together.God bless you all!
