WannkeChaBe
I am a 31-year-old married female. I have no children, and that is due at least in part to my weight.
I believe my weight issues began shortly after my father passed away in 1997 (I was 11). Within a year of losing my father and best friend, I found out I was going to have a little brother, we were uprooted in the middle of the night and moved to Oregon, where we stayed for 3-5 months until we were rescued by my Uncle and Aunt and returned to Washington State. Soon after coming 'home' I was molested by 2 family members and raped by another.
At the time of our return from Oregon, I weighed 98 pounds. Almost immediately after moving into our own place, I was raped by a trusted family member.
I'm not too sure if it was the loss of my Dad or the rape and molestations, but I started putting on the weight.
I don't want to be 'skinny'. I am 5'8" and currently at 291 ( I cannot believe I am publicising that). I want, ideally, to be down to 140-145 and be healthy. I want to run and have fun and buy clothes and shoes like normal people.
I want to have an active and enjoyable sex-life with my husband, play and enjoy being outside in the summer, and be able to look at myself in the mirror naked, and not cry or feel disgusted.
I ultimately want to be free to be me, the REAL me inside instead of the 'me' dictated my weight.
