Question:
How would you react?

I know a lot of people have posted about how their husbands and family have reacted to their weight lose. I'm single and I hope that in the future after my WLS I will will find someone that I want to spend the rest of my life with. I was just thinking how horrified I would be if say that person saw an old picture of me and made rude comment not realizing it was ME in the picture. I would never hide my past I think my weight had contributed to the person I am today but it just got out of control. I have to say I would really question my feelings towards someone who made such comments. Has anyone dealt with this? Has anyone not told a new partner about their surgery...hide the scars or said it was from something else? I know I'm thinking too much...April 7th needs to get here soon.    — Sarahlicious (posted on March 6, 2003)


March 6, 2003
I have lost and gain so much weight thoughout the years that when someone sees an old picture of me they simply say Man you sure can gain and loose weight. I say to them "Anyone can gain weight, anyone can loose... it's keeping it off that is the real challenge, and if they don't like the old me.... tough, too bad, get lost, get a life. I refuse now to have any negativity around me. I have to have someone who wants ME!!! Not skinny me, not fat me, but sweet, wonderful, caring beautiful ME!!!! So if he doesn't like the old you then run away girlfriend and find someone who do.
   — Rebe W.

March 6, 2003
I think that we worry about things like this more than men actually care, do you know what I mean? I was very nervous about this, too, but I have date in the 9 months I have been post-op (LAP RNY) and things have all went fine. I chose to tell some of the guys about my surgery, and some I didn't. I also have an open scar from an ulcer surgery I had less than 3 months ago, so if I choose not to tell a guy, I can be honest and tell him the scar is from an ulcer. The guys I have told were all great with it and didn't seem to bother them. If I told a guy and he made fun of people who are fat or made a comment about a picture, I would def. rethink being with him. A man who is prejudiced in anyway is not a man for me. I mean what would happen if I got fat again, would he just be a fairweathered b/f? He wouldn't be worth your time anyway, so i wouldn't worry about it too much. Goodluck to you! :)
   — Lezlie Y.

March 7, 2003
I have to say that I agree with Leslie (previous poster). If any friend...man or woman made a comment about someone who is overweight, I'd probably not have anything to do with them any longer. I would be self-conscious about them if I gained weight again (it is possible). This is really quite a common thought though so don't think you're alone on this issue. Of course, I know some who've lost a lot of weight and don't bother with their overweight friends again. I am soooo looking forward to being a loser (4/16/03).
   — Diane S.




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