Question:
Will a surgeon hire a still heavy RNY bariatic nurse ??
Jen would like to become a bariatic nurse. Hey thats GREAT! Regular hours, few nights and weekends, end of the bedpan brigade. She is a very caring person, and had some rough times after her surgery. Better to understand others with the same situation.<P> Unfortunately Jen started with a BMI of 60. At over a year post op her loss has slowed, and lets just say exercise isnt her thing. Super morbids have a difficult time loosing it all. I believe a surgeon is more likely to hire a pretty thin post op. After all standing their at a support group meeing if you were the surgeon wouldnt you want hin good looking examples to represent you? Dr schauers nurses ALL look fantastic. I recommend to Jen she exercise and really work at the last 60 pounds sho should loose. She doesnt feel its important. What do the resyt of you think? Any surgeons with post op nurses are they heavy? — bob-haller (posted on January 2, 2003)
January 1, 2003
I wouldn't care what my bariatric nurse looked like. What would mean most
to me is that she'd already been through the same thing I am going through,
so she can tell me what its really like. My surgeon's assistants/office
workers are really small, so, while I love them to death, they have no idea
what it was like to be so big. I say she should go for it. Any employer
that doesn't hire her because of her size isn't worth working for anyway.
— Monica H.
January 2, 2003
Bob, I think it depends on the individual surgeon. My surgeon had no
post-op nurses on his staff. I would tend to agree with you that most
surgeons would want to have post-op nurses that were average/thin and not
look like they were still overweight. Just like law firms, or modeling
agencies, marketing firms want receptionists that look good, etc...The
post-ops that work for them do represent the surgeons and of course, they
would want the best examples. However, it is also important to have staff
that is caring and technically proficient at their job and that truly
UNDERSTAND what the pre-ops and new post-ops are going to go thru. What
better example than someone like Jen? How well does Jen market herself?
If she has a positive sunny attitude, a great resume, and sells herself to
the surgeon, she should get hired on those merits. All she can do is try.
As for the last 60 pounds, you can't force her to lose them, that has to
come from within.
— Cindy R.
January 2, 2003
I think she should go for it! If she started with a BMI of 45 and still
needed to lose 60 pounds I might be a little worried. But, if she started
as a super morbidly obese individual and has basically ended up within 60
pounds of her ideal weight then I feel like that's a huge accomplishment.
In fact, it's a very realistic accomplishment. Sometimes I worry when
people go into this believing they're going to end up wearing a size 6 when
all is said and done. I know lots of people reach their ideal weight but
lots also don't. I think making the most of her current appearance (well
fitting clothes, good hair, make up if she chooses, etc.), wearing a
triumphant smile, and keeping a warm heart will make her a realistic and
successful bariatric nurse. You guys are both an inspiration to us all! Oh
- and I meant to tell you that we have a bariatric floor nurse at my
hospital who is post op and still heavy. She is probably 60-75 pounds
overweight. She works for the hospital and not the surgeon. She lost
about 200 pounds and is positively glowing. She's had a couple of unkind
comments from folks about still needing to lose weight but she always has
that "before" picture handy and that stops any negativity dead in
it's tracks. She's a great asset to our program! Best wishes in whatever
Jen decides!
— ronascott
January 2, 2003
I don't know about what the surgeon will do, but I hope that whoever the
surgeon hires is competent and caring. I wouldn't have cared if my
surgeon's nurse were thin or not. I was more concerned with the way that
they treated me. We have spent most of our lives being judged by our size
and I think even though we have lost weight (whether we are at goal or not)
our minds still give us those negative thoughts about ourselves. I think
she should go for it. Even when I was over 100 pounds heavier I did not
let that get in the way of my career. I think Jen has done a wonderful
job. To lose that much weight is a big accomplishment. I was told that
losing 80% of your excess body weight was successful, I am sure she has
lost that much. I know I am rambling a bit but, I don't think that the way
the nurses look should matter. I didn't go to my surgeon because his post
ops were a size 6 I went to him based on his skills and willingness to help
those of us that are MO. Tell her good luck and if the doctor can't look
past looks then she doesn't need to be working for him anyway.
— tulagirl
January 2, 2003
Hi. I don't know if any of the nurses were post-op or not, but my surgeon
obviously didn't care about their weight. I had a nurse who was overweight
breathing as hard as I was. So like most are saying, I guess it depends on
the surgeon. But what a great idea to have a competent nurse who also had
the surgery. What a boost for the patient that would be to hear from a
nurse who has had it done. :)
— NikkiCarter
January 2, 2003
I have a friend who is an RN at BTC. She had to work there for a year
before she could even get her surgery, so she is actually a "work in
progress." I would certainly hope that a surgeon who deals daily with
obese people would look beyond an extra 20 or 60 or 100 pounds and go for a
nurse who is competent, caring and compassionate. One big motivator for Jen
may be this type of work! Also, perhaps she can be encouraged to at least
do some good stretching exercises, which will help to ease back strain,
etc. when moving patients (of any size). I was told by a physical therapist
that if you want to do the bare minimum in exercising then at least do some
stretching. Next would be to add some walking, of course. Good luck to Jen!
- Anna LAP RNY 7/3/02 -100lbs.
— Anna L.
January 2, 2003
Bob, my first surgeon was very overweight and that really hurt his
practice. I for one left because, I thought if this is so great, why is he
so overweight. The surgeon I have now has a little obese nurse . I dont
know if she has had the surgery or not. Being an R.N. myself, I know how
hard it is for overweight nurses to run the hospital halls. An office job
for jen would be great. By the way, do you always talk for Jen? Just
kidding. lol
— Delores S.
January 2, 2003
Hey there Bob! I think that she should go for the job, it might even
motivate her to lose some more weight. Being in that environment with all
the patients, etc. it would be like a huge support group at work everyday!
I personally wouldn't think anything of my nurse being overweight to some
degree. Extremely overweight I may wonder why she/he didn't have the
surgery done too but you truly don't know if that person is scheduled to
already or simply chooses not to for other reasons. On the other hand, in
my consult I felt like saying to the people that were answering all my
questions and were telling me what I would need to do and not do that did
not have the surgery themselves "what do you know, you have never had
that problem?". Anyway, being a post-op herself Jen would have tons to
offer would-be patients and it definitely makes you feel at ease talking
with someone who did the same thing you are about to do. And, by the way, I
saw several overweight nurses at Schauers office so I hardly think he is
discriminating against the obese and would definitely consider someone that
has the qualifications the job requires. Good Luck!
— Dee ,.
January 2, 2003
I think that would be GREAT!! But the person to really ask is the doctors
themselves. I would love to see a post op nurse at the surgeon's
office...or even a post op patient advocate or counselor...there are
several fields there in which she could go into. Not just limited to
nursing. And hey, an office with those before n afters there...pictures
speak a thousand words!!!
Have a Sparkling Day!!
~CAE~
— Mustang
January 2, 2003
Yep I m trying to motivate her. She joined a gym, and hasnt gone yet:( I
figure a better looking Jen has a better chance of getting hired. It only
makes sense to ME. Schauer introduces his nurses at each meeting saying
they all had surgery. How does it look if one is still obese? Pre ops
naturally want to see thin post ops, I believe this would be espically true
of staff. By no means do I think schauer would discriminate. But if two
equally qualified people applied wouldnt the thinner one have a better
chance at the job? Me and Jen have discussed this at length and I told her
i would ask all of you. Well she wasnt very happy I actually did. I have
only her best interests at heart. Besides if you loose to or near goal and
regain a bit its better than still being obese and regaining 10 pounds from
there.<P> Dr Friday says leave everyone do the thing, whatever it is.
I just would like Jen to have the best shot atr getting the job she wants
wether its for Schauer or another surgeon. See I want her to be happy.
— bob-haller
January 2, 2003
I would think the surgeon office would be happy to have someone like Jen
working for them. What better way of showing people what the surgery can
do for them. Also I would think working in WL office would be a good
incentive to keep losing.
— barbara A.
January 2, 2003
I believe that a bariatric doctor would first and foremost hire someone
who's been through the process. When I went for my consultation, the nurse
I had gave me a picture. This picture showed a girl of 367 pounds. I made
a comment about how big this person was. She told me to turn the picture
over and it showed me it was her. I started crying. She told me that the
doctor that did her surgery specifically requested her to work for him.
— dolphins94
January 2, 2003
I'm a pre-op/recovery room nurse at BTC and had my interview 3 weeks after
my open RNY....needless to say, I hadn't lost any noticeable weight yet. I
was hired on the spot and have been there for over 2 years now. I have
never had a job that like so much and feel so comfortable doing. I
absolutely LOVE IT!
— Lynette B.
January 2, 2003
Men are fixers and women are talkers. We don't want men to fix things, we
want there support. Period. Men often think we want them to help us, or
fix things. My best suggestion (and we know what it's worth lol) is to
give Jen a big hug and tell her you'll root for her while she pursues her
dream. Avoid pointing out the obvious. She can't be blind, but she wants
a hubby who thinks she can accomplish anything SHE sets her mind to - the
same as hubbys want wives who think they can move mountains (even when he
is 90 pounds soaking wet and gets winded moving the lawn mower). Most of
us just want someone to believe in us and support us. Give her a cheer and
if she comes home discouraged because all the docs are hiring the
skinny-minnies, don't point out you were right, just offer a sympathetic
ear and keep on loving her until she figures out how to get what she wants.
— [Deactivated Member]
January 2, 2003
Everyone at my surgeons practice is a different size. In fact his OR head
nurse had the surgery years ago and gained much of it back. She runs the
OR so well, I can't imagine anyone noticing her size. The only reason I
noticed was because she brought it up. Most of the office staff RN's are
thin, two of the surgeons had the surgery. Getting a job in a practice
that is not interested in window dressing, assures a good working
environment. Summary, if they hire her it is a sign that it will be a good
job.
— faybay
January 2, 2003
http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/answers1.phtml?N=l1041520290
— Karen N.
January 3, 2003
I really appreciate all your comments. I still believe that give 2 totally
equal post op candidates the thin one would get the job. But since I made
jen and no doubt some others mad I will drop the subject.
Jen my wonderful wife has never exercised, says "running around at
work is all she need". Well she did walk home from work once 1.5
miles. Because of lack of exercise I fear regain in her future. We are
warned of this. Its a real possiblity and her window is closing, she is out
over a year.
Yeah I am TRYING to fix things:( Guility as charged. This issue was a
effort to motivate her to exercise to reach a goal she really wants. It was
a failure.
— bob-haller
January 3, 2003
I had to calm down after reading what this "friend" had to say
First being a nurse should have nothing to do with her size If I was here
friend I would ENCOURAGE her to perhaps take a MED-SURG OR refreasher
course bone up on her SKILLS I would tell her what GREAT NURSE she is
PUMP her up to go into that interview WOW that surgeon walk out of that
interview with the job in her back pocket......THATS WHAT I WOULD SAY TO A
FRIEND and oh btw maybe that kind of support POSITIVE reinforcement
ENCOURAGE her to work on getting to goal HER GOAL what ever the numbers may
be......
jannie bois BSN, RN
— jannie B.
January 3, 2003
BRAVO Ruth!!
— Toni C.
January 3, 2003
Ok, you probably won't like this answer. Sounds to me like you are
perpetuating obesity prejudice. And- I am going to generalize here- people
of the male gender are much more motivated by viual input. People of the
male gender have, for hundreds of years, done the choosing and the hiring.
It was (and is) felt by other males that you showed your virility by having
the prettiest wife/secretary/receptionist, etc. People of the female
gender have responded to that load of crap by trying desperately to meet
the current description of *pretty*. I believe that many more women pursue
WLS, and I believe that women care more about how they are treated than
whether the staff is slim or not. My surgeon has a drop dead gorgeous
curvey size 6 blonde post op at many support meetings. Frankly, I find her
a bit intimidating, because even if I lose to my goal, I will never look
like she does. I will also never look like JLo/Britany/Julia/Demi. I will
look beautiful to my husband, but then he loved me and married me at my
heaviest. Stop pushing Jen into what you believe. Cherish her and
congratulate her for what she has accomplished and for who she is. off my
soapbox now.
— Karen N.
January 3, 2003
OK, I'm not a nurse but I'm a paralegal. As someone mentioned, law firms
can be into image. I have gotten many great jobs in the legal field over
the past 17 years and only once really doubted someone would hire a fattie
and that was when my now ex-husband said, "Do you think you might not
get hired because of your weight?" So sometimes it's what people put
into our heads that trips us up. I know you are not being prejudiced, Bob,
and I know you love your wife dearly and just want to support her. But I
agree with the other poster who said just hug her and love her. If she's
not hired because of her weight, that's the employer's problem, not hers.
She should just keep on smiling and posting her resume. Someone will be
blessed to have her on staff. (My ex? He never really did work too often
and weight wasn't his problem --- just lack of motivation --- lol.)
— Nell C.
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