Question:
So nervous thinking about surgery considering not having it.
I am crying all the time thinking about the surgery. I know I need to have it and want to, but on the other hand so worried about possible complications that am considering not having the surgery. Has anyone else felt this way before surgery? Mine is on 10-17. — Angie L. (posted on October 5, 2002)
October 5, 2002
Angie, this is a big move. It is not an easy thing to do and you will have
to really want to change your life if it is going to work for you. I was
fine before my surgery but almst backed out in the hospital parking lot.
Just research and pray and talk about it until you are sure. Remember,
it's up to you. You can say yes OR no. Good luck.
— Pam G.
October 5, 2002
What you are feeling is perfectly normal. What you should be doing now is
focusing on the positives. Think about how good you are going to feel and
how good you are going to look. The most common complications are so easy
to remedy. And when you encounter one, you have a host of supporters right
here to guide you through. Check out all the before and after pictures and
read the profiles. Join a local support group and attend meetings and draw
from others strengths and learn from their mistakes. Have faith, be
prepared and don't give up.
— Sue A.
October 5, 2002
Angie you are going thu a roller coster of emotions that many of us
experience. I was 58, had medical problems and a pace maker when i had the
surgery. It can be a scary and emotional time for any of us!!!! Dont
believe everything you hear and take it all one day at a time. Read and
make decsions for yourself. Dont take someone elses word. Also your main
source should be your surgeon first then if you've had a friend or someone
who has gone thu the same thing it helps..but that doesnt mean it will be
the same for you. We all respond differently. I didnt have one bit of
trouble and I love the results and so do my family. My daugher who is 31
just had the surgery 2 weeks ago and shes doing super. (Kim Sweaton) We'll
help you all we can. Walk thu to the other side knowing we are
"spiritually holding your hands" as you meet us on the other
side!!!! One day I cried and cried and told my husband i wasnt going to do
it....the day of surgery I went with a calm peace knowing i was doing the
RIGHT THING FOR ME...ONLY ME. May you find this peace. Jacki
— Jackiis
October 5, 2002
I know that you are nervous and I know that it is scary but think about
this what if you needed say .......an appendectomy and not having it would
possibly kill you or make you very sick you would not hesitate to have this
done. It is the same thing honey you have a life threatening situation
going on and you need to have it fixed same as any other thing. We go thru
so much to prove medical necessity to have this surgery done and it is just
that medically necessary.
think about the % of possible complications from MO and then weight them
against the possible complications of the surgery and see what you come up
with. My guess is that you had to prove medical necessity for this surgery
with the ins co look at all that information.
Good luck!!!!!! You are worth it!
— Peggy A.
October 5, 2002
You sound like me five months ago. I can't even count the number of times
I just about chickened out. I even considered jumping off the bed and
running as they were wheeling me into the operating room. Now I am so glad
I didn't. I am 4 1/2 post op down 92 pounds. I have gone from a size 24
to a size 8 I feel like a kid again. I have never been this happy. Check
out my full profile. Also, check out your doctor. Ask him what his rates
of complications have been compared to the national average and how many
surgeried he has performed. Ask for a list of post op patients that would
be willing to talk to you.
— Linda A.
October 6, 2002
I can feel your stress!! My surgery was on 9/19, and I posted the question
"HELP, I'm thinking of backing out of surgery!" I was terrified,
so I know exactly what you are going through. I even called my Surgeons
office and almost backed out. I know there is nothing that can really be
said to put your fears to rest. I was scared all the way into the OR.
Now, 2 weeks out, I feel great, and am glad I did this. I did not have any
complications, and have had absolutely NO problems. I'm glad it is over
with, and I am recovering and losing weight. You will be there soon too.
I had great confidence in my Surgeon, and had checked him out thoroughly
beforehand. I think it is natural for all of us to be scared. I have had
many surgeries in the past, but was never scared like this. I guess it was
because in a way, I was "asking" for this surgery, whereas
before, I didn't have a choice. Good luck to you.
— beryl
October 6, 2002
I can't even count how many nights I cried myself to sleep prior to the
surgery. Laying there trying to fall asleep and as hard as I tried not to
think thoughts like this I would always be thinking "What if I die?
What are my kids going to do/think? Will my husband be able to raise my
kids the way I want them brought up? Will he be able to do it
financially?" I had thoughts like this almost everyday for a month
and a half leading up to surgery. And like you I knew I needed it but
with all the bad thoughts I was having I thought sure I just willing
something horrible to happen. Then when I was in my gown just waiting for
them to come and take me to the operating room I was crying then too. I
kissed my hubby "goodbye" and actually thought about backing out
at that moment. But I didn't back out and so glad that I didn't.
Everything turned out fine. I have lost 50 pounds as of Monday which was 9
weeks out from surgery! I feel so much better physically and I know it's
going to just keep getting better. Good luck, my prayers are with you!! :)
— Laurel C.
October 6, 2002
Angie, like many before me, you have read that this is normal to feel the
way you are feeling, and it is. My surgery is Oct. 22, just a few days
after yours. I have taken my time in getting to this point. I had thought
about this surgery for years, but while I waited, my knees didn't. My
Family Doctor told me, if I didn't get this done NOW that my life would be
full of Office trips and pain. So for myself I'm going to do this. I have
had friends that have done this and wouldn't trade their surgery's for
anything. So no matter what you do, remember that we are here for you. One
of the things that I do is look at all the before and after pictures out
here...Good luck and God Bless you. If you need to chat, please Email
[email protected] friend....Brenda
— Brenda W.
October 6, 2002
Angie I haven't even had my initial consultation yet but for me so far,
research seems to be the key and reading on this site each day. the more I
know about it the more comfortable I feel about it. Just make sure your
okay with choice because you don't want to live with "what if"
But then I can say that now but I know I'm gonna do the same thing your
doing. I don't want most of my family to even know i'm thinking about it
because they think fat is healthy and normal weight people need some meat
on their bones.
— deniece M.
October 6, 2002
My surgery is Tuesday and for the past week, I have been having these same
feelings. I HAVE researched, and researched and researched this surgery
and all it encompasses. Going to my first support group meeting yesterday
made me realize that I am not alone in this and seeing the various levels
of success in this, made me feel I could do this too.
You might try to to find a support group in your area and call someone from
there. I found out yesterday that there are people who are there for me
all the time that I did not even know.
Best of luck on your journey.....
:-)
Becky Ranee Carlile
— Becky C.
October 6, 2002
I am now 10 days post-op.
I got throught all of the nerves and anxiousness by thinking "this
time tomorrow, I'll be out of surgery". Of course, never having
surgery before, I had no idea what I was in for...but every day was better
than the day before. I walked a little farther, I ate a little more. I kept
on using that trick of "by this time..." to help get by. And now
it's ten days later. It hasn't been easy--my lungs partially collapsed
while in the hospital and I now have a kidney infection--but as I walk
around hunched over, swilling down the broth and water, I keep telling
myself, "in 30 days..." My parents have been a great support
during all of this--I never thought I'd be so cliched as to write: make
sure you have a good support system, but it's true. Also, if you aren't
ready to do this--I counsel you to wait. Don't bully or shame yourself into
doing this, and don't let anyone else bully or shame you either. It is hard
work afterwards, and this is major surgery, so it is not a decision to
lightly ponder. Again, I don't know how I could have done it without my
family....
— Carla C.
October 6, 2002
my only advise to this is TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS. Worrying is completely
normal, but don't think that just because you have come this far means that
you CAN't back out if you want.
There is less that a 1% chance of fatality with this surgery, which is the
same for any surgery, so you are 99.5% likely to be fine.
I am a big believer in instincts though, so I would say, just make sure you
follow them...if your heart is telling you NO, then follow that...but if
your heart is just worrying and fretting because you are a passionate smart
woman who would never do something so drastic without considering the
"what if's"...then keep in mind, that is TOTALLY normal! I do
it every day and my surgery isn't until Dec 26th!
Did this make sense? =) LOL
— thekatinthehat
October 6, 2002
My mother thought I was nuts. I could not wait to have the surgery. I was
52 years old when I had it done and never-ever thought of complications.
All I thought of was that I would be able to bend over, walk up stairs
without huffing and puffing, get into smaller clothes, get rid of GERD and
sleep apnea and all the good things. Keep a POSITIVE attitude! I truly
believe that outlooks and attitudes have a whole lot to do with our lives.
Good luck!
— Betty Todd
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