I've accepted the "new me," why can't the rest of the world?

At damn near three years out, when I've accepted the new and thinner version of me, it seems that those who knew me when I was obese will never let it go.  I don't ever want to forget where I've come from, but sometimes it's baffling when those from my past can't just accept my changes too.  Bare with me while I type this out.  I'm not even sure how to say what I'm feeling. 

Yesterday, on stupid Facebook, a "friend" who knew me when I was obese posted an obscene so-called-joke basically saying that she wishes death to Obama.  It's a popular status on Facebook for those who hate our president.  I don't know when our world got so messed up that we wish death on anyone, but it's the sad truth.  I am so sick and tired of staying quiet about bull**** like this, so I confronted her on it.  I said..."C'mon Jenn, wishing death on our president is ridiculous.  I don't care if you hate him, I thought you were better than THIS.  I hated Geoge W. but I never wished death on the moron."  Her response...."Be serious! Stop trying to be so righteous and start worrying about losing the weight you've regained from your gorgeous surgery. You know the one you'd never have to worry about regaining weight from. You come on."

Sigh....what the **** did that have to do with me confronting her on her nasty status?  Will the world ever see me as the person I've become???  Furthermore, this girl has NO idea how I feel about the size I am now.   I've never told her I was trying to lose weight or anything about my "regain."   I'm HAPPY to be at the 145-150 range.  This looks SO much better on me than 116 pounds did. My regain has been a POSITIVE thing!!! What do I have to do to make friends who knew me then realize that I LIKE the way I am now? 

Oh, and the reason she was so nasty about calling the DS my GORGEOUS surgery is because she had the crap band, er...I mean lap band placed a few months before my surgery.  I've been very careful with my words about the Lapband around the forums because the ONE time I would say ANYTHING about the lapband, she would get all defensive. (I guess she had nothing better to do than to look at my past posts???)   Guess the good thing about us no longer talking is that I can say what I REALLY think about the stupid choke chain!!! 

I think I just needed to air this out.  I don't have to worry about this friend b/c she and I have now severed ties over this petty argument.  Easy to see how little I meant to her in the first place, so no loss.  But I guess my frustration is...when does the rest of the world catch up with my loss and just accept that this is who I am now?  When do my friends who knew me then stop bringing the subject up EVERY time we're together?  It just gets OLD.  Will I always have the fat girl in my shadow?  I don't even know if it's a bad thing.  Just disheartening at times.  Maybe I'm just being too sensitive b/c I'm on my period.  I just don't get it.

Thanks for listening.

Lori

It sounds like this "woman", and I use the term loosely,  was really just trying to make a jab she knew would be painful.    Aren't you glad she is out of your life.  You really should send her some flowers to say thanks.  You didn't need her for a friend.

The other girls, you just need to see them more often so the new YOU becomes imprinted in their subconscious. 

When my wife and I meet up with people, they always make a big deal about her 100 lb weight loss, for me, it might be mentioned in passing.   I think woman are more attuned to other woman.  I also  think most formerly obese woman are not comfortable having attention focused on how they look.  But yes, over time they will accept the new you.

Oh, by the way, you do look good. 

Good point, women are really much more critical of each other than men.  I just get so tired of talking about it.  I'm happy to talk to DSers anytime, it's just that the subject amongst my normie friends is getting OLD!!!  I'm probably just being sensitive right now anyway.  I'll get over it.  Don't really have a choice, just needed to ***** to my buds.

Lori

 I am baffled when people are this hateful. You know what they say, "hurting people hurt people".  She sounds envious for one thing.  And, when people are this toxic, it is just healthy to remove your self from their lives. She obviously feels threatened by you.  She owes you an apology. I am sure you won't hold out for one.  She is just plain wrong on so many fronts.  I am sure you know this, but this is not about your weight at all.  It was just an excuse to slam you.  So, she went for the jugular.

You're right.  Thank you for your wise insight.

Lori

 I agree about the going for the jugular. She didn't comment on politics or anything else, hell she could have called you stupid or naive (which neither being true ever you could have just had a hearty laugh!). But what did she do? She essentially called you fat. She called you out for gaining weight. She went straight for the hot button, she pulled no punches and went straight for the thing she was sure would make you feel as ****ty as possible. And that is no friend, not now, not ever.  

My God Lori I don't even know what to say about this person except "GOOD RIDDANCE!"  With friends like that honey who the hell needs enemies?

People like her spew out **** due to jealousy over your success with the DS.  As for the Facebook thing about Obama, good for you for speaking up.

Keep on keeping on girl!  We adore you here at every size :)

Hugs,
Mickie

Your friend's response oozes jealously!! Probably cuz you're hot and she's not!

You are better than me, Lori. I after taking awhile to really decide what I wanted to say would blast her a new one. I am very tolerant but that was just totally uncalled for and she knew it. I love the idea of the flowers but instead I would send her a basket of meat that she has a hard time eating..lol.

ETA: I am very sorry that this has happened to you. :(

I love the way you think, love!  Off to Omahasteaks.com I go!  Lol!  I'm signing the card, "How's your lapband treating you now, ****waffle?"

Lori