My rant about "cheating"...

I was writing a reply that turned into a rant, which wasn't really addressing the question of the original poster.  So I'm just putting it out on its own.  I feel like I'm on a one-woman campaign to stamp out this whole self-defeating concept of "cheating."  It is part of a diet mentality, and is not helpful!!

Look, I don't eat recreational sugar.  Or, I should say it's my plan every day, one day at a time, not to, I hope until I die.  I accept I might not do it perfectly, but it is as fundamental to my personal peace of mind as not doing heroin.  Eating an Oreo wouldn't be "cheating", it would be a freaking big red flag that something was really off the rails.  Eating an Oreo would mean I was in a really bad place, about to spiral into the living death of addictive eating, roaming from one store to the other like a zombie in search of a fix.  It wouldn't be "cheating." 

"Cheating" for me means pulling a fast one over on the diet police.  Guess what?  There is no diet and there is no diet police.  There is just me and food and choices about what I'm going to do.  "Cheating" = "Diet" = "Temporary Deviation from Eating What I Want."

Eating hit fat foods (for me) is not addictive, it is a choice.  I get to make that choice because it's *not* addictive (for me) and it either is or isn't conducive to my goals for healthy eating.  But it isn't "cheating" if I eat it.  It's a tradeoff I make for other foods in my plan, or my overall goals for calories, or a tradeoff in the speed of my weightloss.  It's not the Army, outside of sugar, I am in complete control of my food choices.  I just have to acknowledge what the impact of my decision might be and move on. 

I had some artichoke dip last weekend at my sister-in-law's.  I didn't put it on crackers, I had several bites from a spoon.  Not my best moment, I know.  It is part of why I'm stalling, and part of a bigger picture of where I am with food and weight and weight loss.  But it wasn't "cheating."  It was not a great choice, but I get to make not great choices *and* I get to learn from them.  What I don't get to do is make choices I don't acknowledge, or feel like I'm being sneaky and getting away with something, or feel like there some standard imposed from the outside ("diet") that I'm not living up to. 

I have a food plan, not a diet.  I strive every day to keep my calories between 700 and 800 calorie**** my marks on protein, keep my carbs low.  But this food plan is my choice, I embrace it, I own it, and even when I don't make my goals, I AM NOT CHEATING.  I am a human being with an addiction to food.  If I want sanity around food, I need to have a plan, abstain from my personal binge foods, and be accountable (not mindless) about my food choices.  I will have to do this today and tomorrow and probably every day until I die if I want peace of mind.  

Rant over.
 

Very well said 

Looking for the "LOVE"  button Happy becuase this is truly an awesome post.   I refuse to think of this as a diet and cheating is a word I eliminated from my vocabulary.   Should I stray it will be considered going off my plan.   But the plan is something I will always need to have in place.  FOREVER.

 I'm making my husband read this!!!! 

Thank you!!!!!!

:)

Thank you so much for posting this!  I really needed this today!

Awesome post Happy! Even though I've not been sleeved yet I was on a 1500 cal diet for 5 months and have now dropped down to 1300 calories just to get prepared for my sleeve and the change in my eating habits that will come with it. This helps both my husband and I to learn about foods during this process and make better meal choices. He is actually so supportive and reading calories at the grocery store for me! He's now looking at proteins and carbs too in preparation for my sleeve. Cheating is not a word we use in our house. We just make 'adjustments' if I've made a bad choice. So far I've been able to stay away from sweets of any kind for about 4 months and I don't feel like I'm missing anything. But Mexican food is my weakness so we've agreed to have it only every other week - 1 meal early afternoon so I can walk extra and make other 'adjustments' for the day. Thank you for the post - you make a lot of sense!!!!!  

Old habits die hard. For a long time trying to lose weight has been such a negative experience it is no wonder we use words like cheating. Great post!

i'm reading this out loud to my honey today! This is a terrific post!

Amen, sister!  Well said!

Great post. I do however have 1 day a week that I  allow myself 1 cheat item. I also have 1 piece of dark chocolate daily for sanity. Whether it be a slice of greasy pizza or an unhealthy greasy cheeseburger with fluffy white flour evil bun I don't feel guilty. I have however substituted the word Cheat with Naughty. It is my naughty day and I am fine with that. In fact these weekly days give me something to look forward to and actually have helped break stalls for me. Not everyone experiences this so I guess I am lucky. And who are we kidding - bad food tastes good. Nothing wrong with a treat every now and then. Then again if it makes you spiral out of control it is probably not a good idea for you, but for me - it works. I have learned to respect food. It can give you pleasure but it can also destroy lives.

All this talk about food naughtiness makes me want to hit the gym!