More re. Port. OR police officer 'terminated' after WLS fib

Personally, I don't think it's anyone's business that one is havingf WLS.  I'm an RN and I did tell the MD I worked for but I did tell my co-workers that I would prefer that when patient's asked(clinic nurse) how I'd lost weight, tell them she just decided that she'd had enough of being overweight, walking 2-3 miles a day, etc.  I didn't want people to know...they weren't paying for it.  Some people are not supportive whatsoever!!!  They don't have your best interests at heart.  They're like the food police.  There's a lady at my church who's postop (Dec 2005); her pre-op weight was 440 and she's currently 300.  Well, she started losing weight, but whenever we have lunch/dinner at church, she's piggin' out and everyone's talking and whispering about her.  Also, living in a small town, her vehicle is seen at restaurants...needless to say, people are still talking and watching her.  I didn't want people to waych my every move.  In addition, if I didn't do as well as someone else, I didn't want to be compared or considered a failure.  Ya'll know they'll say, "she went through all that and didn't lose hardly any weight or she's picking that weight back up."  Don't fool yourself, people treat us differently because we're obese.  Right now, I'm 230 (down from 376) and people comment how good I look; on the other hand, the lady at church, no one ever speaks an encouraging word to her.  As far as the integrity of police officers, well, we're all human and mess up.  No, I'm not condoning her taking the money under false pretnses; but firing in my opinion is a bit extreme.  I know officers who stop ladies for bogus reasons just to get phone numbers, have affairs, use excessive force, plant evidence, concoct stories, etc.  That's my opinion...and I'm sticking to it!!! T

She lied. And now she's paying the consequences for it. I understand why she lied, but I also think you (proverbial you) have to take responsibility for your actions and pay the consequences and not cry about it or expect sympathy because you got caught lying.

As for not telling people, I didn't tell hardly anyone. I just didn't have the energy to weather the unsupportive comments and stuff like "didn't Carnie Wilson have that and she gained all her weight back" or "my friend of a friend had that and she died" or "why don't you just eat less and exercise more". My emotions regarding the whole situation were already so raw, I just didn't have it in me to be the WLS educator, cheerleader and poster child for everyone I know.

I have started to tell people now, and have gotten the above comments as well as some supportive ones. But I feel like I'm in a much better place to be able to handle it.

I had a very interesting incounter with a child about WLS.  A girl age 15 which I have known since she was 3 years old and who was friends with my daughter up until this year, said to me "my mom said you had to have surgery to lose weight. " And this girl was very disrespectful to me, she said I was a fat *ss before my surgery but "no I had to have surgery to lose weight "and that is when she said that her mom said I had to have the WLS to lose.  I'm amazed that a mother would say something like that to her child and then I'm amazed that a child would speak to an adult in that way but I guess it should not surprise me these days.  Maybe Mom is jealous because I'm now better looking than she could ever hope to be...

What a shame. She really should have sucked it up and told them the real reason. I'm sorry, but I am NOT ashamed of my surgery. I get bad reactions from people because I had it when I was 20, but I did it for me. NOT THEM. My fiance works in corrections and I know that this crap would not fly there. She would be gone. My policy has always been honesty. Honesty is the key. Oregon doesn't mess around either. Let me tell ya. Where I live...you don't get by with anything. Oregon likes to take care of things quickly to avoid any issues. Again...what a shame.

A lie is a lie no matter what size the liar is. A lady in My state Massachusetts told people she had cancer and they raised all sorts of money for her and she wasn't sick with anything. She was just a skinny liar. Guess what she went to jail. This police  officer is lucky she only got fired and is not behind bars.  Maybe she should have bit the bullett and taken the time off without pay and maybe been more carefull with her sick time. I know about sick time Im the gastric bypass complication queen.  Too bad she ruined her life over a stupid lie like this, who would hire her now.

As someone in law enforcement, I hate to see a fellow officer lose their job.  But what I hate more is ANYONE who brings dishonor or shame to our field.  As a society, we choose to focus on the negative, we always do.  And unfortunately, there are officers who do negative things.  The problem I have with this is that one lie; one bad choice; brings shame to all of us.  It is not just the reputation of the officer involved that is tarnished, it is the job itself.  Comments made in this thread alone prove that out.  Christina W. states that it is a well know fact that officers by nature are dishonest.  We lie in interrogations, we lie in investigations, and we lie on the stand.  T states, "I know officers who stop ladies for bogus reasons just to get phone numbers, have affairs, use excessive force, plant evidence, concoct stories, etc."  As someone who has served my community for over 15 years, how am I supposed to react to that?  Do I have co-workers that lie, sure.  Do I have co-workers that may overstep the lines of their authority, sure.  Can anyone tell me that they don't have some co-workers who have the exact same problem?  When you hire a police officer, you are hiring a human being.  And since there has been only one to walk this Earth without fault, there is always the potential for bad hires.    If you say to me that the majority of my co-workers are dishonest liars, and that excuses this officer’s dishonesty then at a minimum I would say that you are uniformed and your logic is flawed.  Are there bad cops, yes.  Are there also bad pizza delivery guys, doctors, and garbage men?  Yes.

As to her lying, I have a big problem with this.  There was no reason to lie.  Everyone who has seen a doctor in the last ten years knows about Hippa.  We know that we do not have to disclose specific information about health issues to employees, employers or anyone else.  She could have simply said "I need an emergency medical procedure."  No one made her give a reason.  No one asked her for specifics.  She volunteered this info.  She made the call to get the money.  They asked what it was for.  She told a lie.  The "evil police department" didn't make her tell them anything.  She made a conscious decision to lie.  And her reason was that she didn't want to be "ribbed" for this surgery.  So it was a choice that her honesty and reputation were less important than possible teasing.  This to me speaks to integrity.  Are you willing to suffer some teasing and ridicule to preserve your sense of self? If your not, that you do not belong behind a badge.

My last thought is simply this.  How does she expect to succeed at this surgery if she will not even be honest with her children as to what is happening?  How can you expect to succeed at WLS if it is based on a lie and you try to live a lie covering it up?  She didn't just keep this from co-workers; she kept it from friends, family and children.  Doesn't it strike anyone here that there are obviously some other issues going on?  And as a matter of disclosure, I work for a department at least the size of Portland's.  And yes my co-workers are aware of my pending surgery.  And yes, I have been the subject of jokes and backtalk.  And to that I say, "So darn what?"