It Still Works!!!

Well I am 6 years out and I learned something over the last 3 months that I thought was pretty interesting.  A little about myself.  I started out at 626 lbs and lost over 350 lbs over the first 2 years but then I stalled.  It was my fault entirely that I never reached my goal for I was loosing so fast I thought I was invincable.  I was loosing 20-30 lbs a month and I thought one bad thing wouldn't hurt me.  Well I started having more of the bad things and added diet pop to the mix and I lost that dumping that helped control me at first.  I stopped dumping on sugar and high fat meals so it was almost like it used to be only on a more limited basis.  I still didn't eat like I used to but over the next 4 years I put 80 lbs back on and that is something that is embarasing to talk about for I went into this saying when I lost the weight I would never gain it back.  Well let me tell you it happens to more people than you would think.  I started to feel that helpless feeling again that I felt pre-op.  I would try for a few days and then slip slowly back into the old habits a little at a time until I would sabatoge myself.  No one to blame but myself.  I made the choices even though I knew it was wrong.  

But 3 months ago I decided enough was enough.  I bought a food scale and started measuring my foods and cut back to what I was eating at the 2 year mark for obviously it worked then and it was enough food to keep me satisfied and I cut out all diet pop and high fat meals.  

A remarkable thing started to happen.  The first 2 weeks were hard I will not lie.  I started to notice that I started to get the old stomach back.  The 8-10 ounces of food filled me up again.  I had a bowl of raisan bran cereal for breakfast last week and dumped instantly.  I thought bran cereal, thats healthy, but the sugar made me dump again.  The other night my wife was hungry for egg rolls so I had one baked along with 3 ounces of grilled chicken breast and brocolli and I dumped instantly.   I haven't had that in 5 years.  I know sounds stupid to be excited that you dump but I want that, I need that to remind me to stay on track.  I am not depending on the dumping to tell me what foods are good and bad for I know that, we all do.  But now I will think about that food I am putting in my mouth again for there is consequences to eating bad food.  I still might make a wrong choice from time to time but I am more aware and debating if I really want that.  Most times now I decide its not worth it and I don't make it or don't eat it.

It was exciting for me to know that it is all coming back to me again.  The old tool still worked when I let it.  I've always known what I had to do but it was up to me to decide it was time.  I got off track and it was up to me to start down that road to get back to my goal.   In 3 months I've lost 35 pounds and will start riding my bike to work again in a few weeks when it warms up enough so that should help me even more.

Just because I am 6 years out doesn't mean I have all the answers.  Yes I knew what I had to do and I slipped up and ate around the surgery.  Nobbody's fault but my own.  I still have the food demons I had pre-op and I will fight them my entire life.  It is never to late to get control again. 

So the moral to this long story is it doesn't matter how far you are out from surgery, the tool still works if we work at it.   This gives me hope and the determination to keep working at it.  It will take me a while to loose the weight I gained but for the first time in a long time I feel like I have a chance.  It has always been up to me but just like pre-op we must each have that moment when we say enough is enough and take control of our lives.  

wow - thanks for posting this - good for you!  It's really a continuous journey isn't it?  Congrats for recognizing that and being willing to continue traveling!

thanks for the inspiration!

Thank you.  You're right it is a journey that never ends.  It is one I will be on for the rest of my life and I'm okay with that.  I wouldn't change having the surgery for anything for it has given me so many blessings.

First of all.. Congratulations...And thank you for sharing.  It's good to hear from someone who so far out that is able to come back a report on their progress.. ANNNDDDD It's good to know that the tool still work IF YOU WORK IT..  And it will work..  I am a firm beleiver in that. 

(sidebar.. Ummm I kind missed the dumping syndrome too ...

It is a little hard to talk about the weight gain and one I hesitated to talk about but I think there are a lot of people that are in the same boat I am.  Yes I gained back 80 lbs but I still lost 260 lbs and am now approaching the 300 lbs lost mark again.  I will always consider my surgery a success for I got my life back. 

Thank you for this post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I am 5 yrs out and have gained back some weight, due to going back to old habits etc. Keep saying I will get back to the basic and something in your story really gave me encouragement.  I also believe diet pop really causes one to eat more and is bad.  So thanks again and I will begin my journey once more.  

Betty,

I have seen many posts about diet pop and I always thought how can it be bad, there's no calories.  I have seen in three months how much less I can eat and I yes the weighing of the foods helps but I can't help but think that no pop is helping me as well.

Good luck to you as well.  It never gets easy does it.

Calvin

Calvin....Thank you Thank you!  I've said this is just a tool and you have to work the tool.  My MD said it wouldn't work after another 3 months and I had to get my weight off before then.  Thanks it's nice to know it will work later and I knew he was a crazy resident anyway.  Thanks again for that wonderful story.  Patty B

Your MD must be talking about the honeymoon stage for the tool is always still there as long as we keep working at it.  It won't be as easy as it was the first 18 months but it can still work no matter how far out you are. 

Keep up the great work.

As a person hoping to have this surgery sometime this year, this story really brings a new meaning to me. I have that fear of failed diets but knowing that as long as I pick myself up and dust the food off of me, I will make it, helps! Thank you! Keep up the great work and remember why you began this journey in life to begin with!