Anyone feel (or felt if post surgery) isolated, depressed, lonely?

Sabyan2060
on 8/8/14 4:14 pm - Belton, TX

I have really felt all this in the last week or so. Much more intensified then normal. 

 

I don't live near family and since my accident and divorce I have become isolated. Only person I ever talk to is my mom. I truly have no friends which is so sad. How do i even make any when I live in a new town and I am on SSDI so I don't work. Only time I even leave is to do to various dr appts each month and to the store. 

I have realized over the past few days that I live through the TV and my Facebook "friends" and my vice, celebrity Gossip and news. 

 

Any tips on how I could met new people?   Wish there were support groups near me be there isn't. 

 

Hope y'all have a awesome weekend 

 

Amanda

Amy Farrah Fowler
on 8/8/14 6:43 pm

I've had several bouts of depression in my life, and have found it very helpful when I've gotten professional help. I also needed medication to get through it once, but sometimes people need to be on something to stay on an even keel, so you might want to schedule and appt to talk to someone to see if it helps.

That said, I think it's a good idea to do things that interest you, and then you meet people that have the same interests so if a friendship is struck up, you will already have things in common to bond on. 

Places that I have met people that I clicked with are a book reading group, knitting/crochet group, jewelry makers, board gamers and poker games as well as different exercise groups like walking and a carpool to go snowboarding. All but one of the things I mentioned were free, so there are things you can do to meet others that are friendly to even the tightest budget.

BettieLou
on 8/8/14 9:05 pm

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. I think loneliness and isolation are the most crippling things we can go through. I am lucky to have friends, but I don't live near any of them so I am pretty lonely on a daily basis, especially now that I don't have a steady job.

I second the suggestion to see if you can find a local group that intersects with your interests - knitting circle or a reading club, whatever floats your boat. Check out your local library to see what events they have planned - many of them do informational sessions and free classes, so even if you can't get further than a polite chat with a fellow participant, at least you've had some interaction and learned something. Also, volunteer. You have skills and time, and volunteering is like a job that doesn't pay - you'll get "coworkers" again, and maybe make some good connections. If you're any kind of religious, join a church. I'm not, but I understand it' a great way to make connections and feel part of the community.

Good luck, and big hugs.

Valerie G.
on 8/9/14 12:35 am - Northwest Mountains, GA

Without wls at all, moving can really bring into perspective all of the friendships you've fostered over the years.  The thought of starting all over again sucks.  I have also done this 6 months ago, and have been blessed with some very friendly neighbors out here in the south.  The tone overall in this area is hospitable from everyone.  If you're not working, this makes it harder to foster any good relationships.  the next recommendation would be joining some hobby groups or better yet, a church.

Valerie
DS 2005

There is room on this earth for all of God's creatures..
next to the mashed potatoes

Sabyan2060
on 8/9/14 5:32 am - Belton, TX

Thank you all for the kind word and ideas. I love to read and will try to find a reading group close by and possibly volunteer at the children's hospital. Wish me luck :)

MegZorar
on 8/10/14 4:16 am

Good luck, Sabyan2060. Loneliness is tough. I wish you all the best.

 

     

MsBatt
on 8/10/14 4:28 am

Your local library can probably hook you up with several reading groups. What hobbies do you have? I've met a number of great people through my local plant swap.

jille_bean
on 8/10/14 1:31 pm

Amanda,

This is going to be part of your new journey.  Being overweight is very isolating and if you give into it, you can become a hermit.   Take your surgery as an opportunity to turn everything upside down in your life.  Why stay at home?  Why watch Gossip and news?  Go out for a walk, find a hobby, go to the library.  Look at your local schools and see if they have anything community education-wise?  As you slim down, hopefully your confidence will increase... but you have to want it.  My niece had surgery about a year and a half ago and she was mad because she found that people treated her differently... gave her more attention and she was angry that they didn't do that when she was fat.    Needless to say, she has a lot of self-confidence before and after surgery... but you will get treated differently... and if you want a difference in your life, you need to be willing to embrace the opportunity and make the change you want in your life.   I wish you the best of luck... don't give up. 

Jill

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