Concerned...I want WLS but am afraid.

So I have applied for WLS and am waiting for the nurse to approve my initial questionnaire... I brought this up with my mom last night.  She knows how I have struggled with my weight and always wants me to lose weight to be healthier, as she worries about my health.  I told her I was considering WLS and she freaked out.  She said there has to be another route, etc etc.  I should probably mention that my aunt (Her baby sister) just passed away last week due to surgical complications...well it wasn't WLS but it pretty much was caused because the surgeon messed up with a surgery and in turn caused her to have BM waste spread throughout her body; she was poisoned from the surgeon not following procedure.  Now my mom is still sad, and I am too.  I am worried too that something may go wrong with the surgery and I could die from it...if you read my previous post about anesthesia complications/problems with my family history, that doesn't really help my situation!

I am worried about the surgery going wrong now...is there anyone else that had WLS that felt this way before surgery and what did you do to overcome this?  I know nothing is guaranteed and we can't tell the future and there are risks and complications with any surgery, but I honestly do not think I can do this weight loss and keep it off on my own anymore as I have failed at this miserly before.

Maybe I need some reassurance that the new technology and that the surgery is done laproscopically should help settle my nerves, but things can happen and I am just such an unlucky person!

I did tons of research on bariatric surgeons.  I went to three new patient informational seminars before I picked my surgeon.  I think because I did so much research and went to the three seminars that I felt confident in the surgeon that I selected.  Now there are COE (Center of Excellence) surgeon/facilities that have to meet certain criteria and guidelines to keep their COE designation.  I would highly recommend that you only consider (and select) a COE. 

I was pretty sure that I would be the ONLY person ever that failed at WLS (lol).  I had tried so many diets and diet programs for years that I didn't think WLS would work for me.  Thankfully, 13 years later I can say that I was wrong.  WLS did work for me.  From being a member of the OH community and reading other member posts, I know that others have had the same concerns.

I understand your mom's reaction after the loss of your aunt and your own concerns.  Any surgery has risks and we know that going in even if you do your research.  I know that with my co-morbid conditions that the risk to have surgery was lower than all the medical issues that came with being as big (and getting bigger) that I was. 

I can understand you Mom freaking out under the cir****tances.  But WLS is very safe.  Very different from years ago when they "opened you up"  Now, they do it laproscopicaly (sp?) and you have five small incisions.  And all the pre-op testing you have to go through makes it even safer.

Maybe you and your Mom could go to an Orientation together - you will get a lot of information that would probably reassure the both of you.

It is so much better to get the surgery when you are young - before you cause major damage to your body because of obesity.

Good luck to you.

Wish I could say the same. I am one of those regretters of having wls

How is this helpful?  Your regrets have nothing to do with your experience at the time of surgery, which is what the OP is asking about.

We get it... you regret having surgery.  Some do. If you are going to post that you regret it on every other post by a pre-op who is nervous, though, you should at least explain why you regret it, especially in a case like this where it is completely irrelevant to the question posed.

Lora

As the last poster says - I completely understand you regret your surgery. But stating that with no explanation helps no-one and is irrelevant on this thread. 

I think the best thing you can do to alleviate your fears is to carefully and thoroughly research the surgeon that you're considering using. Then sit down and talk with the surgeon, discuss your fears, and ask him/her about his complication rates.

Having confidence in your surgeon will do much more to alleviate your fears than just hearing from random people on the Internet who used a different surgeon, especially since –- as you have sadly seen with your aunt -- even a generally very safe surgery can go wrong if the surgeon is careless. 

Lora

I am 10 years out now.  I would suggest that you research your surgeon, and that you seek out a therapist to speak with about your fears.  Try to keep your family fears about the surgery separate from your own fears.  Make your surgery for you and about you and don't project your mom's fears onto you.  Therapy will help you with this.

Thank you all for your kind words.  I do appreciate it.  I may take her to an orientation so she can see what it is all about!  Oh yes I have been researching surgeons and stuff like it's my job lol.  Thank you all!

When I found out that I was a candidate for WLS it both excited me and scared me.  I followed the process and was thankful for the 6-month wait period of required PCM visits and nutritional counseling.  Do you research, read all you can on this board and you will make the best decision for YOU!