Jealousy

Gwen M.
on 1/7/15 12:35 am, edited 1/7/15 12:35 am
VSG on 03/13/14

A few people who had surgery around the same time I did have been posting about reaching goal and I'm sad that this has brought out a lot of jealous feelings in me.  I'm jealous of people who only had 100 pounds (or fewer!) to lose.  I'm mad at myself for getting to the point where I had 200 pounds to lose in the first place.  So many feelings swirling around this.  :(

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

CerealKiller Kat71
on 1/7/15 1:41 am
RNY on 12/31/13

Aww, Gwen, I completely understand!  I sometimes feel the same way but I am really happy for them, too.  Jealousy is such an awful emotion --  

I don't have any great words of wisdom, but I hope that it helps to know that you aren't alone.  

"What you eat in private, you wear in public." --- Kat

Gwen M.
on 1/11/15 9:44 am
VSG on 03/13/14

It does help to know I'm not alone.  And you're right, jealousy sucks :P

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

StacyJo44
on 1/7/15 1:47 am - MN
RNY on 12/31/14

I think there are a LOT of us here who are angry at allowing ourselves to get to a point where we ended up opting for WLS. Whatever our individual reasons for choosing to have WLS, it's an emotional journey for all of us. All these emotions you're feeling are to be expected at one time or another, the key to getting through the sadness, anger and jealousy is to change your prospective. You've lost almost 124 lbs and nearly 100 lbs in less than a year! Have you ever been able to do that before surgery? It's AMAZING! Sure, there are others who have lost more in that time, but there are others who've lost less. How much healthier are you now? How much more active? How much has your loss relieved daily aches and pains? We might all be on the same journey, but our paths are so very different and filled with different obstacles and we will all reach our destination at different times but that's ok because what's most important is that we will get there! Can you imagine how you'd feel and look today if you HADN'T had your surgery? I'm only 7 days post op and I look at your ticker and think "WOW, I hope i'll be able to lose 100lbs in 2015"! Let go of the negative and celebrate all the positives! Believe me, from where i'm standing you have plenty to celebrate hon! Keep the faith and wishing you nothing but continued success and happiness on your WL journey! 

    

 

    

    

        

angelstwo
on 1/7/15 3:24 am
VSG on 10/15/14

This is a wonderful post - StacyJo44.  Thank you so much for writing it.  I was starting to get depressed while reading other's post about how great their weight loss has been.  My weight loss has stopped over the last month due to the medical treatment for my issues.  (I have actually gained 5 lbs)  I know once I am off the TPN my weight loss will begin again- but I am just feeling like am being left behind in the dust.  This sentence really spook to me "We might all be on the same journey, but our paths are so very different and filled with different obstacles and we will all reach our destination at different times but that's ok because what's most important is that we will get there!"  I just really needed this post today.  Thank you both Gwen for the topic and StacyJo44 for your answer. 

Robin

  

HW:  407; Decision Wt:  399; Consult Wt:  391;  SW:  327;  Pre-op weight loss:  72;  Post-op weight loss:  ??

Gwen M.
on 1/11/15 9:45 am
VSG on 03/13/14

You make really super points and I appreciate it.  Most of the time, like 99% of the time, I can think this way and I know that I'll reach my goals and that my life is infinitely better than it used to be and that those are the things that actually matter.  

It's that 1% of the time though, ya know?  When I'm just like RAR, NOT FAIR.  

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

GeekMonster, Insolent Hag
on 1/7/15 5:09 am - CA
VSG on 12/19/13

If it makes you feel better, I'm ENVIOUS of you for being in Onderland since you have surgery AFTER mine 

It is difficult to see people reaching their goals (and their goal weights are far lower than mine) and knowing that I still have so much to lose.  I completely went off the rails over the holidays and gained six pounds in about two weeks.  It was a combination of sloth and gluttony, throw in some depression, temptation and self-pity, and my mind was back to preop mode of eating everything all the time.

Yesterday was my first day back on track.  I had a headache all day long, either from carb withdrawal or dealing with the idiots at work.  But I did stick to plan and managed to exercise last night.  I hate to put it into the context that I was taking a "diet vacation" because to me, that's an unhealthy way to deal with food.  This was my first holiday season post surgery and I found it was filled with traps.  

Thank you for bringing this up.  It's good to know someone else feels the same way.

"Oderint Dum Metuant"    Discover the joys of the Five Day Meat Test!

Height:  5'-7"  HW: 449  SW: 392  GW: 179  CW: 220

T Hagalicious Rebel
Brown

on 1/7/15 6:30 am - Brooklyn
VSG on 04/25/14 with

Luv your avatar!, sometimes I want to throat punch my supervisor when he acts up. LOL

No one surgery is better than the other, what works for one may not work for another. T-Rebel

https://fivedaymeattest.com/

Gwen M.
on 1/11/15 9:48 am
VSG on 03/13/14

I guess we're all envious of someone, right?  I should keep that in mind too.  

I know what you mean about the holidays.  My mom had candy dishes out with my biggest weakness, those reese's minis.  I wanted to shove them all into my mouth.  And I feel like I did.  Sigh.  I'm actually really glad to be getting back to my normal life.  It might not be super exciting, but I love it and there aren't candy dishes everywhere! ;)  

We CAN do this.  Because we're awesome, amazing, and smart people :)

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

T Hagalicious Rebel
Brown

on 1/7/15 6:28 am - Brooklyn
VSG on 04/25/14 with

I can understand how you feel, I get jealous too sometimes when others reach their goal weight and I have still so far to go. On one hand yeah I'm happy for them & on the other I'm like when the hell will I get there. 

I can only say that like you I also have 200 pounds to lose, actually more, but would love to see what 166 would look like. Accept that you've got some negative feelings going on & you're not the only one & try to get past them & concentrate on the positive.

You've made it to onderland!, you're running!, like marathon running, you've probably got a whole bunch of NSV under your belt. Hopefully we'll all make it to goal & you can look back to see how far you've come.

No one surgery is better than the other, what works for one may not work for another. T-Rebel

https://fivedaymeattest.com/

Most Active
×