Another NSV.....why do these one's make me so uncomfortable????

Awww Deb big hugs !!!! I am very sure it was a compliment, at work ppl always tell me I am disappearing, which makes me feel weird too cuz I still have so much more to lose until I reach my goal. I see your loss big time, and you look amazing my friend, don't u ever forget it !!!! Just cuz we lose weight doesn't mean we don't have feelings though. I get the "skinny *****" and other comments too. I just say ya ya, and move on. I think mentally for me, I used to try to hide all the time cuz of my weight, and now we seem to be "in the spotlight" and its hard for us when all we did before was try to hide. It plays tricks with your mind for sure. I can't get away from the "oh ya....maybe ppl won't be saying.....damn she is big" to themselves, as I felt they did before. The "oh ya I can walk that far and not ache or be winded". My mind was like that for so long, it doesn't forget so easily. I loved the response from Reliena, she nailed it !!! Don't forget, sometimes ppl don't know what to say, and aren't always politically correct, just know you did this for you, to be healthy and you are rocking it !!!!   xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Thanks Arlene, you're right the compliment was totally meant in a positive way. I have no doubt that the compliments bring out my automatic thought " I'm doing damn goo.....but I still have about 40 lbs to go. The logic brain says " for God sakes it's 40 lbs.....you have had ONLY 40 lbs to lose since you were 17 years old. It's all that internal conflict I'm dealing with...." who am I now "

I know, I have 53 to go till I am 160, what i would like to be. When ppl say...how much do u have to lose...that messes me up...I feel like OMG I still have 53 lbs left....Thats a biggie for my mind, Even when I flip it and say hey....I have lost 72 lbs, most ppl say |OMG thats great, but it never feels like its enough. Which again is just my brain. When you wrap your head around how much u have actually lost...and come to terms with it...then its real and you realize what an accomplishment you have made. I don't know why, but 70 lb mark for me finally sounded like ALOT !!! LOL I weigh now less then I remember, I was 217 after I had Jamal almost 12 years ago, it was short lived. I am 213 now. I guess all we can do is take a deep breathe, smile and nod.....and come to each other for support. I will always be here for you !!!! 

Mona8,

I know what you're saying - and what everyone else has been saying, that the comments are meant to be complimentary, but they leave you wondering (at least I do), just what people thought of me before I'd lost a significant amount of weight.  Also, I don't notice how I'm getting smaller the way other people often do. 

Most compliments are nice to receive and then the people drop the topic, but one woman has been hounding me in the condo, wanting to know absolutely exactly what I did to lose weight because her daughter has a lot of weight to lose and I do not want to tell her - she's just a passing acquaintance, just someone I meet every few weeks in the hallways.  She keeps asking exactly how I did it and has even asked my father, which is pretty pushy, I think.  I mumbled some other plausible reasons how I might have lost the weight - she asked me, "did you lose 40 lbs", so I thought that it wasn't out of the realm of possibility to lose that much weight without WLS, but then I think of her daughter, and wonder if she needs to lose just 40lbs, or half her entire weight, like I did/do, so I second guess my decision not to tell her a little.  But, at the same time, I think it's none of her business, especially when she's being so pushy about it.

For all the pre-ops; many, many people have never mentioned my weight loss once, many others have paid me a compliment once or twice, and no one has been annoying yet, just that lady in my building.  Just remember, it took those of us on the bench a while to get there.  It took me 16 months and I had no tests other than blood work and EKGs.

Jenn.  :)