I suck.

I am at the beginning of my 2nd week of a 3 week liquid diet  and for whatever reason my food obsession got the best of me and my work bought everyone sandwiches for lunch because we all are working a long day today.  I stupidly chose to not have my slim fast and ordered a low carb wrap with meat, lettuce and vinegar.  I ate most of it and had such an overwhelming sense of guilt, disappointment, and am now mentally ready to crawl under my desk and cry. 
I know it's just one meal, and i still am almost 2 weeks away from my surgery, however I am so upset that I cannot even control my eating that it makes me scared how i am going to finish the rest of this liquid diet.  I am writing this here to try to put it behind me and move forward for the rest of the day but just feel such a sense of sadness about the loss of food. 

Maybe I'm a bad influence but I say, don't sweat it. It was just one slip up and a rather healthy one at that. It's not like you went to a buffet! Just get back on the wagon and do the best you can.

Thanks... I know it was just 1, but I have 12 more days to go and am just doubtful about my willpower.  I know it's out of my hands and I truly am powerless over food, I just hate being out of control.  I figured posting here and writing in my journal would allow me to move past it and not dwell.  I think it's working since I feel a little better now then I did 15 minutes ago.  :)
Still not doing it ever again though. :) 

HI THINVOYAGE , YOU ARE DOING GREAT,KEEP UP GOOD WORK.

The pre-op liquid diet is soooo hard, so I don't blame you! I don't know why surgeons make patients do it for 2-3 weeks -- it's just crazy! Mine was a week and it was hard, but I could still have veggies. The whole idea is to shrink your liver to make it safer for surgery. It's hard to survive on liquids pre-op -- you don't yet have the luxury of having 85% of your stomach removed. Don't be too hard on yourself! At least you made a good choice overall with it being a low carb wrap and with vinegar rather than all the fatty condiments. Shrug off that useless guilt and move on :)

Cheer up, and do right from here on out. no biggie, try not to beat yourself up about it. Also from my personal experience slim fast did not do it for me and I was always starving, The bariatrics choice protein shakes you mix at home have so much more protein and kept me full for at least 2 1/2,  3 hours. You might try some to see if that helps combat the food monster.

like others have stated previous, don't dwell on it... you can't reverse time.. just move on, and stick to it.. I had to do 2 weeks and it was so hard, but i think what kept me on track and not cheating was the overwhelming sense that i could be sliced open from belly button to rib cage if my liver was too slippery and big for the doctor to get under it with laporascopic surgery.  This is the reason they make you do the liquid diet... it's not to torture us before surgery, it is medically needed so they can do the less invasive cutting.  Keep that in your head... you much rather have the 5 small incisions, than a big huge scar down your stomach...

Jessica -

You're better than I was.  I was told 'two weeks, liquids only'. 
I about DIED.  After three days, I was weak and miserable - so on day 4 I had some chicken. 

Guilt, Guilt, Guilt.  That was me, too.  But, I decided I hadn't gone bonkers and eaten something deep fried, so I forgave myself - and even gave myself one final meal -  I went and had a half of a (very small) steak because I knew I wouldn't be able to handle beef for a looooooong time after surgery.  Once I had that out of my system, I couldn't believe how happy I was and how easy it was for me to stick to the liquid diet - - I just needed to say goodbye to beef and that little bit of chicken! 

If you get those overwhelming urges again - get up and do something!  Go somewhere - and when you make it to the end of the pre-op diet - do something to reward yourself!!  (I bought some comfy new pjs to wear at the hospital!)

The sense of los****s me every once in a while, too - - and I am only a little over 3 weeks out from surgery.  When we go to the movies, we go to a movie grill....with lots of food.  I still gaze longingly at their crunch chicken tenders...but remind myself that every tender I pass up is getting me closer to my ultimate goal!!!

 HI JESSICAE,  PLEASE DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP, YOU ARE DOING GREAT. YOU DIDNT EAT SLICE  CAKE YOU ORDER HEALTHY.