3-Month Update!! (long)
So I’m here with my 3-month update! Man it’s only been 3 months but it seems like forever! So I decided to write a list of things I’ve learned In the past three months with my sleeve… I’m not particularly good with writing out my feelings so this is a “free-style"" (pics below!)
-My knees don't hurt anymore – I am able to walk exercise and feel like a more normal person since the weight has been coming off. They’ve always hurt me since I was about 13, and the past 3 months have been great since I can do anything and they don’t bother me. For this I’m grateful.
Every calorie counts! I’m meticulous about what I put in my mouth, because there’s only so much room in my little tumtum that I have to be careful. And when I make bad choices (simple carbs) It either doesn’t sit well with me and I get the foamies, or I am sluggish and tired which makes me want to eat more. I just try to stay away from them. I watch EVERYTHING I - not just calories, but more importantly the quality of the calories!
I appreciate food more - partially because I can't have everything I want – so what I can I have I LOVE. Also, I’m thankful for the energy that food will give me and keep me going. So I guess you can say I eat more for the fuel than for the pleasure of eating itself.
I'm more aware of myself - I didn't like how I looked on the outside so I wasn’t introspective either. I didn’t want to think about the emotions that I was going through because it all related to how I felt about being so large. To me it was a temporary state. But that “temporary" state was a permanent because it was my whole life. And I only realize now how much I missed learning about myself because “this was going to go away after I lost the weight" I’m getting to know myself again. I’m further aware of how I neglected myself and focused on the outside. I wasn't unhappy just didn't feel like my outside projection represented me!
I still don’t like attention from other people. I'm dealing with a lot of outside attention – from people that know I had the procedure and their appraisal of how I look each time they see me. It’s not bad or judging I just kind of feel like I’m on display and I hate when all eyes are on me. Others who I haven’t told or who haven’t seen me in a while are like “Wow, you look great!" and they want to know my “secret". So far it’s all come from a good place, but it’s a lot. If you thought people were looking before – they’re LOOKING now! Lol.
But it’s a double edged sword. Because I then think “man, was I THAT bad before???"
Flirting... Where before it wasn't as often and I didn't take it seriously, I have to learn how to talk with guys again - another post for another day lol
Sex is better! *giggles*
I miss eating rice :-(. A lot. I’m Haitian and it’s the main carb in any meal, and I miss the different flavors, combinations, the texture. But my tumtum still isn’t confortable eating it, so I have to resolve with the fact that I may not be able to eat it again.
Falling off of the workout wagon - my life has been more crazy/busy than usual and I'm still losing without being as dedicated to the gym/exercise as I was before. I want to put in 100% but because the weight is falling off its easy not to be as focused on working out - 1-2 days/week.
I need to step out of my food “comfort zone" and try new things. Because I still can’t eat everything, I stick with what I know and I need to get my stomache used to eating denser foods. But sometimes I get so frustrated with the fact that eating is such a process, I’ll take the easy route and have something soft, instead of slowly adding back denser foods into my diet. I know I can’t eat soft n’ light food forever and I have to get my sleeve used to working like it did 3 months ago.
It’s definitely easier to say no to food though! If it won't sit well w me I won't go near it.
Sorry I know I rambled on, but it’s more of a list of my feelings in reflecting back the pat 3 months. Hope this helps some newbies out there
Before/after - 50 lbs gone! Instead of rewarding myself with food, i booked myself for a massage instead!
1 month before surgery
This past weekend
-My knees don't hurt anymore – I am able to walk exercise and feel like a more normal person since the weight has been coming off. They’ve always hurt me since I was about 13, and the past 3 months have been great since I can do anything and they don’t bother me. For this I’m grateful.
Every calorie counts! I’m meticulous about what I put in my mouth, because there’s only so much room in my little tumtum that I have to be careful. And when I make bad choices (simple carbs) It either doesn’t sit well with me and I get the foamies, or I am sluggish and tired which makes me want to eat more. I just try to stay away from them. I watch EVERYTHING I - not just calories, but more importantly the quality of the calories!
I appreciate food more - partially because I can't have everything I want – so what I can I have I LOVE. Also, I’m thankful for the energy that food will give me and keep me going. So I guess you can say I eat more for the fuel than for the pleasure of eating itself.
I'm more aware of myself - I didn't like how I looked on the outside so I wasn’t introspective either. I didn’t want to think about the emotions that I was going through because it all related to how I felt about being so large. To me it was a temporary state. But that “temporary" state was a permanent because it was my whole life. And I only realize now how much I missed learning about myself because “this was going to go away after I lost the weight" I’m getting to know myself again. I’m further aware of how I neglected myself and focused on the outside. I wasn't unhappy just didn't feel like my outside projection represented me!
I still don’t like attention from other people. I'm dealing with a lot of outside attention – from people that know I had the procedure and their appraisal of how I look each time they see me. It’s not bad or judging I just kind of feel like I’m on display and I hate when all eyes are on me. Others who I haven’t told or who haven’t seen me in a while are like “Wow, you look great!" and they want to know my “secret". So far it’s all come from a good place, but it’s a lot. If you thought people were looking before – they’re LOOKING now! Lol.
But it’s a double edged sword. Because I then think “man, was I THAT bad before???"
Flirting... Where before it wasn't as often and I didn't take it seriously, I have to learn how to talk with guys again - another post for another day lol
Sex is better! *giggles*
I miss eating rice :-(. A lot. I’m Haitian and it’s the main carb in any meal, and I miss the different flavors, combinations, the texture. But my tumtum still isn’t confortable eating it, so I have to resolve with the fact that I may not be able to eat it again.
Falling off of the workout wagon - my life has been more crazy/busy than usual and I'm still losing without being as dedicated to the gym/exercise as I was before. I want to put in 100% but because the weight is falling off its easy not to be as focused on working out - 1-2 days/week.
I need to step out of my food “comfort zone" and try new things. Because I still can’t eat everything, I stick with what I know and I need to get my stomache used to eating denser foods. But sometimes I get so frustrated with the fact that eating is such a process, I’ll take the easy route and have something soft, instead of slowly adding back denser foods into my diet. I know I can’t eat soft n’ light food forever and I have to get my sleeve used to working like it did 3 months ago.
It’s definitely easier to say no to food though! If it won't sit well w me I won't go near it.
Sorry I know I rambled on, but it’s more of a list of my feelings in reflecting back the pat 3 months. Hope this helps some newbies out there
~Jules
Before/after - 50 lbs gone! Instead of rewarding myself with food, i booked myself for a massage instead!
1 month before surgery
This past weekend
My vlog: http://www.youtube.com/user/juleslac?feature=guide
Highest weight: 298 Surgery Weight: 291 Current Weight: 231
Weight/Inches lost by time period: M1: 24.4/10.25 M2: 12.6/10.25 M3: 9/8.25
Hey Lorraine,
I've been following you on youtube for the last month and I just love your positive energy! I don't know you personally but I wish I did because you are the inspiration and motivation that I need and like. You tell your story how it is, you share with us the lessons you have learned and you manage to make me feel like I am on this ride with you. I greatly appreciate you video blogs and love hearing about the lessons you have learned! You are doing great, can't see the pics but I know from your videos you face is really showing your loss! Cant wait to see whats next for you :) Hows the new place and your doggie doing?
I've been following you on youtube for the last month and I just love your positive energy! I don't know you personally but I wish I did because you are the inspiration and motivation that I need and like. You tell your story how it is, you share with us the lessons you have learned and you manage to make me feel like I am on this ride with you. I greatly appreciate you video blogs and love hearing about the lessons you have learned! You are doing great, can't see the pics but I know from your videos you face is really showing your loss! Cant wait to see whats next for you :) Hows the new place and your doggie doing?
OMG thank you so much for your kind words! I started the vlog to hold myself accountable and I never really know how people are receiving my videos (and if I make ANY kind of sense! LOL). It's nice to know that I'm helping others all while I'm trying to help myself. I'm no where near perfect and with the stumbles along the way, i know that it's most important that I keep moving forward. I tell ya, people comment and say that they see a difference, and for me I really didn't see it until recently! I'm behind on the videos becasue my computer is acting up, but I'm going to post the latest 3 this week! The new place is doing well, I'm settling into my new house and job, and Pepe is doing great! He's at my parents during the week though since I don't have the luxary of bringing him into work with me, but I have him on weekends and I see him during the week. I edited the page so hopefully you're able to see the pics now. I'm going to post them in my videos also!
My vlog: http://www.youtube.com/user/juleslac?feature=guide
Highest weight: 298 Surgery Weight: 291 Current Weight: 231
Weight/Inches lost by time period: M1: 24.4/10.25 M2: 12.6/10.25 M3: 9/8.25
Always great to read you! I am Haitian as well and I DO understand the rice issue :)- I sometimes try to taste it but quickly learn that it is just not for me anymore, or at least for a long while. I am at the 2-month mark and feel pretty happy with the decision to have had surgery. Everything you say SOOOOO resonnates with me. I get it. I get you. Hang in there and keep on being courageous, candid, and perseverant. It is a self-learning road that I am very happy to have embarked on because, without comfort food and binging in the equation, it has forced me to learn about myself and face myself and implement corrective actions to forever change the trajectory of my life. Take great care! A bientot! :)
Pre-op/HW: 302- SW (7/16/2012): 296 lbs- GW: 160-150 lbs. Month 1: -32 lbs.- Month 2: -16 lbs.
www.theskinnygirlinsideofme.blogspot.com
www.theskinnygirlinsideofme.blogspot.com
. could not see pictures either.... 
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