October 1, 2010

Oct 01, 2010

Hello world,

I was amazed at how many people have viewed my profile since I started this journey.  I am 5 years out. 5 years.  Sometimes I want it to be10 years.  How much of life and love did I miss by hiding behind my weight.  I always thought I was happy but now I kinda of question it.  I don't want to  be prejudice now that I am smaller but I know I was not happy in many aspects of my weight.  But I was happy with my life.

My life has changed.   I had the Panny done 8/2/10 but if you ask me I think  my stomach looks deformed because now my belly button is so low.  I didn't have the tummy tuck with it because I could not afford that $5,000 and insurance was not paying for it.   I am trying to work with what I got. Exercising, toning that area as much as I can.  Maybe someday the money will come for the tummy tuck and thigh lift.    I'm still happy I did it.

Well I am officially divorced. After 24 years.  We are still friends, I've only known him since I was 12!  He has moved on and I will have to do the same. It's scary to be out here DATING?!?! Oh know. 

Anyone who has read this blog knows I don't like shopping for clothes.  I am still wear stuff too big.  I got a few things that fit.  I do have some good bras... that's the main thing right?

My dog died in March. I'm still grieving.  Every time I say that I think of the Bojangles song. " The dog up and died, He up and died. After 20 years he still grieves."

My children are all grown and so self sufficient.  I still give out gas money every now and then but pretty much on their own.

My appetite has returned but I have learned so much in 5 years I haven't gained anything.  Still at the 183 to 185 if not lower now since the surgery about 179 to 180.   I like me at 183.

Still the same story.  Watch what you eat.  Exercise regular. Treat yourself and don't feel deprived.

WLS the best thing that I have ever done for myself. 

I'm really proud of what I have accomplished.  The Lord has blessed me more than my 2 hands can hold.

"The grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, someone to love and something to hope for"  -Joesph Addison.

Peace be unto all the readers.

Pam

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